Whether you want to go out with your friends in the afternoon to go to the mall or you want to attend a future event, you need your parents' permission to do so. Especially if they are particularly protective of you, you will need a good strategy to convince them. Do your research and be prepared to respectfully negotiate with your father and mother to get what you want.
Steps
Part 1 of 3: Set a Time to Talk to Your Parents
Step 1. Ask your parents when they have time to talk to you
To get them to let you out, time has to be on your side. Find out when they have a few minutes to sit down with you and talk about your future plans. Meet their needs and don't expect them to listen to you when you are free.
- If your family gets together for dinner, you can ask at the table. If, on the other hand, you spend Sunday afternoons relaxing together, this is a perfect time to talk to your parents.
- Act early for important events. If you want to ask permission to go to a concert in a month, don't wait until the last minute. Parents appreciate scheduling, especially when transportation and expenses are required.
- Parents rarely accept last-minute plans, but in some cases you may be given permission to visit a friend at her home, even on short notice.
Step 2. Make sure they are in a good mood when you discuss your plans
If they are tired or stressed, they would probably answer no to any request. Wait for things to calm down before asking if you can go out with friends.
- Make sure you are not in trouble or in detention before asking permission to go out.
- If you are in detention, you will need to be forgiven before you get any favors from your parents.
- Try asking after all week's homework and errands are done. To sweeten the pill even more, try clearing and washing dishes after dinner as well.
Step 3. Be patient when waiting to talk to your parents
Tormenting them relentlessly would make them say no. Annoyed parents will be less likely to grant your requests, and if you insist too much, you may even get into trouble. Give them a couple of days to reflect.
Step 4. Respect your family's commitments
Whatever your intentions, it is in your best interest to try to plan activities that are compatible with your family's daily life. Don't ask your parents to talk about important projects on a very busy day. Rather, wait for everyone to be home, enjoying a relaxing evening, and have time to listen to you.
- For example, if your mom has to take your sister to volleyball practice, you might ask to be dropped off at the nearby mall because she's on the way.
- Coordinate your plans with those of your parents. Try not to ask for passes too often and instead think about how you can take advantage of the journeys they have to take anyway.
- Avoid asking to skip a family event to go out with friends. In the future it would be more and more difficult to get others yes.
Part 2 of 3: Negotiating with Your Parents
Step 1. Prepare to submit your request
Make sure you know all the details when talking to your parents. The more information you have, the higher your chances of success will be.
- Tell them where you will go, who will be with you, how long you will be out and what you will do.
- Throughout the conversation, be completely honest. If they catch you lying, you will lose their trust.
- No detail is too many. If you want to attend an event, find out in advance if you need a ride, money or reservations.
- Start small and gradually expand the scope of your plans. Before asking if you can go on a week-long trip, try to get permission to stay overnight at a friend's house for one night. If you show that you can handle these short outings, your parents will trust you to leave you alone for longer.
Step 2. Explain why you want to go
It may be obvious to you why you don't want to miss the only concert in Italy of your favorite artist or the exceptional sales at the mall. Your parents, on the other hand, may not understand that these are important events to you, so be clear when asking for permission. Explain why these are essential opportunities for you.
If the event offers educational benefits, be sure to explain them to them; they will no doubt care about your academic achievements
Step 3. Use the words they want to hear
They care about you, your safety, and they want you to have the best in life. Assure them that you will go to a safe place and that you are not foolish enough to do something dangerous or illegal. Promise to always carry a charged cell phone with you and communicate with them at regular intervals as long as you are out of the house.
- Tell your parents if there are any adult carers who can look after you.
- Even if they already trust you, reminding them why you are trustworthy will have a better chance of convincing them.
Step 4. Stay calm as you discuss your plans
By holding a dramatic attitude and raising your voice, you would prove that you are still too immature to go out on your own. You can let your excitement shine through, but don't let the enthusiasm turn to anger if things don't go your way. You still have a chance to convince them, so don't blow her up by losing your temper.
- Even if you feel like they will say no, do your best not to scream, scream, or raise your voice in frustration.
- Don't threaten them and don't make claims. You won't be able to get them to let you out by telling them to stop running errands. You would end up in serious trouble.
Step 5. Give them time to reflect
After setting out your plan, let them think in peace. You might say, "Thank you for listening to me. If you want to think a bit before deciding, I understand." This way, you will show that you are patient and mature, even if you just want to spend a few hours at a friend's house.
Step 6. Involve your siblings only if necessary
If your parents are still not convinced, propose taking your sister or brother with you. In some cases, the company of a sibling may convince them that you will not behave badly.
- Siblings have a tendency to spy. You can use this habit in your favor, because your parents will trust you more if you are accompanied by your brother.
- Make sure you behave flawlessly, because your brother could really be a spy.
Step 7. Accept defeat to win in the future
Even if your parents said no, you can still take advantage of the situation. Thank them for talking to you, don't get angry and don't scream. If you show maturity and understanding even in the face of rejection, it is possible that the next time you make a request, they will answer yes, because they will be positively impressed by your behavior.
Part 3 of 3: Getting a Yes
Step 1. Finish all your tasks and errands
Make a point of tidying up your bedroom and finishing all school projects before talking to your parents. Don't give them a reason to doubt you, but rather impress them with your time management skills.
If you don't have time to get everything done before you ask for permission, promise your parents that you will take care of all your business before you leave the house
Step 2. Have your parents talk to your friends or carers
They will probably ask if there will be any adults present when you go out with friends. Give them a chance to call other parents. By showing them that you will be under adult supervision, it will be easier to get them to let you go.
If no adults are present, don't lie. Eventually they would discover the truth
Step 3. Give them a chance to meet your friends
If they've never seen the people you want to hang out with, they may worry. Invite your friends over to let your parents know them. That way, when you ask if you can go out with them, they will know who it is and can trust them.
Step 4. Flatter your parents
By praying and pleading, you can achieve your result. While you wait for your parents to give you permission, write cards for them or talk to them to show how much you appreciate them. Behaving yourself helps, but try bringing home some flowers for your mom or letting your dad eat the last piece of cake.
- Be discreet and not too blatant. Parents easily recognize attempts at flattery.
- Do not overdo it. Try to sweeten them, but don't lead them to believe you are faking it.
Step 5. Offer to do chores around the house
In addition to the tasks you already need to do, take care of a few other matters. Wash the car, mow the lawn before they ask you, or help your mom cook dinner for a few nights. If you do the work for them, they can relax more and be in a better mood when you ask for permission to go out.
Step 6. Show appreciation for your parents
Thank them no matter what their answer is. If they let you out, be grateful. If they refuse, thank them anyway. Remember, your parents want you to have fun, but they also want the best for you. Be grateful for their love and protection, regardless of the outcome of your conversation.
Warnings
- When trying to convince your parents, always be honest.
- Betraying your parents' trust is the quickest way to get grounded and jeopardize your future plans.
