Are you a very good friend of a guy… maybe even his best friend? Then, he asks you out and you don't know what to do. You obviously don't want to ruin your friendship. Don't despair - this article will help you.
Steps
Step 1. Be prepared
If you have heard from some of his friends that he intends to ask you out and he has not yet done so, you have two options: let him do it or try to stop him. If you chose the first option, go to the next step. If, on the other hand, you have chosen the latter, do everything in your power AVOIDING hurting him. Try to avoid situations that would be congenial for him to propose to you, such as being alone with him or in a romantic place. Also, ask a mutual friend to let them know that asking would not be a good idea. If, however, he still decides to step forward, skip to the next step to learn how to behave.
Step 2. Answer his question
This is the decisive step. He asked you out! If you're reading this, he's probably not interested in that role. If you like him, you should definitely agree to date, but if you don't want to, you can tell him directly to his face or say you'd like to think about it. Saying it directly to his face gets the message across, but you could hurt his feelings and make both of you uncomfortable. A good way to do this is to say, "Thanks for asking, but I wish we were just friends." If you're not sure how you feel about him, add "for now" to that sentence. If you told him instead that you want to think about it, this will give you some time to really think about it, but you would end up feeling even more uncomfortable; therefore, the best thing is always the direct approach. Even if you don't want to hurt him, it would be worse if you told him you like him when you don't. If you consider him a special friend and have respect for him, you should answer truthfully rather than babbling about nonsense, like that you are in love with him but don't feel ready.
Step 3. So, you rejected it. After you have done it, you absolutely must behave as if nothing had happenedunless he started crying or making a scene; in that case you should repeat the same things you said before. Behave as you usually do; in this way it will be as if nothing had happened. Try not to look uncomfortable at all. Your friendship relationship could even IMPROVE after this experience. For now, act like you don't know they like you. The only thing you need to be careful of is to avoid flirting with him, otherwise you would just confuse him.
Step 4. If he feels the need to talk to you about it, let him talk about it
Be patient with him. If the guy you like had rejected YOU and you felt the need to talk about it with him, the last thing you would like to hear from him would be: "FOR THE LAST TIME, I DON'T WANT TO KNOW ANYMORE !!!!" Try to avoid hurting him in any way.
Step 5. Be prepared to sever all contact with him if necessary
If he continues to insist or becomes rude to you, you will have to stop being friends with him. If he were a true friend, he wouldn't try to pressure you and he wouldn't be inappropriate with you, right? He probably feels a little hurt and this alone would be enough to explain his behavior. So if you've never talked about it, do it now. If despite all your efforts, he persists in being rude, end your friendship. You just have to tell him that you need to take a break for a while. If asked why, then say, "Because I don't feel comfortable with you because of the way you are behaving and, frankly, I don't think a true friend would treat me like that." Then, leave. Be firm, but let him know that you understand his feelings.
Advice
- If you rejected him because you like one of his friends and not him, don't try to get together with his friend immediately afterwards. It would be very bad for us.
- Try to understand what he is feeling.
- Try to pay attention to your facial reactions when he asks you out. Do not make faces or the expression of someone who is about to burst out laughing. Try turning away or make a straight face.
- If you decide to reject it, act as if nothing has happened.
- After you reject him, ask him to go out for a drink or have lunch together. Do ANYTHING to let him know that you always want to be his friend.
- Before he asks you out, if you decide to ask a friend for help to discourage him from trying, make sure they are someone you trust and won't cheat on you. Also make sure it does its job well.
- If you notice that the guy is upset, don't avoid him. Ask him what's wrong, even if you already know the answer.
Warnings
- Clarify your feelings before dismissing him: Are you sure he's just a friend to you? He won't forget your rejection, and if you ever decide in the future that he wants to take your friendship to the next level, he may not be interested in you anymore at that point.
- If you are not careful and do not try to make things go back to the way they were before, you could also lose him as a friend.
- Don't let him be rude to you. Confront him.
- Don't let it haunt you.
