Striking up a conversation with a guy can become the most complex and embarrassing thing in the world, especially if you think he's handsome. But if you can arm yourself with courage, the results may be worth the effort. Here are some simple and easy-to-follow tips for starting an interesting conversation with a guy.
Steps
Method 1 of 3: Make him talk
Step 1. Introduce yourself
The most direct way to talk to a guy is to walk up to him and introduce yourself. It doesn't matter if it's your new colleague, or a guy who hit you while walking down the school corridor or a stranger you saw at the bar; pull your shoulders back, smile and approach casually. Say hello to him, tell him your name and ask him for his, if you're lucky he'll do his part!
- Once you know his name, use it frequently in conversation. People like to hear their name - it makes the dialogue more personal and creates a certain intimacy.
- Say something like "Hi, I saw you around and I thought I'd introduce myself. My name is Katia, you?" Simple!
Step 2. Use the circumstances of the situation you are in
One of the easiest ways to strike up a conversation is to take advantage of your surroundings. It could be literally anything - the weather, traffic, or the results of a sports competition. You could directly address him a comment or do it to yourself, out loud, hoping that he will take the opportunity and try to respond.
- Making a time appreciation may seem trivial as an approach, but it works. Try saying something like, "Nice day, huh? Isn't the bright sun really nice?" Starting a conversation with someone you don't know is mostly about breaking the ice and opening a line of communication. Once this is done, you can move on to more interesting topics.
- If you are sitting next to a handsome guy on a train or plane, try to complain quietly about the delay, or the inconvenience of the journey. If he is interested, he will take it as a cue to respond with a hint of understanding. Once you have her attention, you can start chatting!
Step 3. Ask him for help
Men love to help women. They are biologically programmed to do this. For this reason, involving them by asking to help a lady in need can be a help in starting a conversation. Calling on his manly strength and muscles - will give him self-confidence and make him feel more comfortable with you, allowing for a smoother dialogue.
- If you're having trouble with a heavy stack of documents, or a bulky crate, ask him for help. If you can't open the coffee container or can't twist the cap on the water bottle, ask him a favor.
- Remember to smile and thank him softly for his help; everyone likes to be appreciated when they do a good deed. By the way, this way he'll be ready to come to your aid at the next opportunity.
- But be careful not to overdo it. You want her respect as well as her attention, so don't play too much checkers in distress, or you will appear to be clueless.
Step 4. Compliment him
Guys like them just as much as girls, so giving him a genuine and enthusiastic compliment will put you in a good light, thus increasing his interest in talking to you. A compliment is a good starting point for a conversation, in fact it allows you to give a light tone or complicity based on what inspires you best at that particular moment.
- If he doesn't embarrass you, compliment him on his amazing eyes, gorgeous abs or his George Clooney smile. This will let him know that you find him physically attractive; all guys like to hear that.
- If you want to be more original, appreciate her elegant dress, her funky t-shirt or her cologne that smells wonderfully; pretty much let him know you appreciate his good taste.
- Show your appreciation for their job skills or sports skills if you get the chance. Tell him he did a terrific job with the presentation, or that he played really well. He'll know you were paying him special attention.
- Alternatively, you can compliment him on something less personal. If you meet him walking the dog, say something positive about the dog rather than him (you will earn even more points). Or tell him that the sandwich he chose for lunch looks like a great idea. In short, whatever catches his attention and stimulates him to chat.
Step 5. Ask him a question
Questions are great places to start a conversation, especially if you're feeling a little uncomfortable. In fact, under the pretext of asking for information, they give you an excuse to talk to him. They can be simple and short. However, avoid the kind of questions that he can answer dryly with yes / no, since they would lead to embarrassing silences, blurring the occasion of the conversation.
- Formulate the questions in such a way that he must necessarily think about the answer, or at least that he is forced to give you more than a monosyllable as an answer. Sometimes men can be a little "dumb", so try to give them "a hand" during the conversation. At some point he will realize that you are more interested in him than knowing what time it is.
- Ask him if he has a pen to lend you or if he saw the basketball game the previous night. At that moment you need to get his attention and get him involved in the conversation, so don't worry too much about the topic.
Method 2 of 3: Make him keep talking
Step 1. Find a common interest
Finding something you share is valuable for a dialogue. If you find a topic that both of you enjoy, chatting smoothly will become easier. Even if it is a topic that you are not very knowledgeable about, show your interest by asking him questions and giving him the opportunity to manage the speech.
- For example, if you find that you both love football, ask him what his favorite team is, which players he thinks are the best and who they will play against in the next match. Once you get involved, you will probably never be able to get him to stop talking, and he will surely think you are a particularly interesting girl since he sees you so involved.
- Try to infer his interests by looking at his clothes, accessories, or desk. If it had the name of a band on the shirt, great! He clearly loves music. If he has a surf image as his screen background, you'll have a good clue as to his interest in surfing the waves. Pay attention to the small details, they can help you choose the right topic to keep the conversation going.
Step 2. Ask him open questions
To have a smooth conversation and discover the boy's interests and personality, it's important to ask him open-ended questions. Avoid questions that can be answered in one word or automatically, without thinking.
- For example, avoid starting with "How are you?". He would respond with a simple "Good" without even thinking. Better to start with a "What did you do over the weekend?" or "What about the new boss?". This will force him to concentrate a little and form a sentence.
- Alternatively, you can try one of the "one or the other" questions: "Do you prefer the Simpsons or Family guy", "Rock or Hip-Hop?", "Hamburger or hot-dog?". Whatever you answer, joke about it, in no time at all you'll both find yourself laughing.
Step 3. Listen more than you talk
For a successful conversation, you need to listen more than talk. It's not for nothing that you have two ears and one mouth, right? So when you have started the flywheel, take a step back and listen to what he has to say. Let him lead the conversation - if you haven't noticed yet, men love the sound of their own voice.
- Even when you're not talking, stay engaged in the conversation. Confirm what he says with a smile, nodding, and making appropriate expressions and gestures.
- Being a good listener has two positives: it allows you to make a good impression, making him think that you can listen and that it is pleasant to talk to you, and at the same time it gives you the opportunity to find out if indeed this guy is worth the time he you are dedicating to him.
- From the things he tells you you will get a pretty clear idea of his personality and you can think about whether or not you want to take the next step. This is important because, to be honest, if you didn't find him interesting now, the situation wouldn't change by going out with him.
Step 4. Ask interesting questions
On the other hand, if you have nothing to say, he may also find you not particularly interesting. Elevate the conversation beyond the normal chat, ask him a thought-provoking question, and make sure you hit home. Give him something to think about and he'll keep thinking about you even after the talk is over.
- For example, ask him funny but interesting questions, such as, "If you could visit any place in the world, which one would you choose", "If your house was burning, what three things would you save? '" Or "If you were a character in a book or a movie, who would you be? ". These questions are likely to make him smile, and the answers will give you some insight into his personality.
- Instead, you could be more serious and personal and ask him questions like "Have you ever been in love?", "What is your biggest regret?" or "Where do you see yourself in 10 years?".
- Just to be clear, these aren't the questions you ask to start a conversation, or ask out of the blue. If you do, he'll probably think you're a little crazy. It's best to reserve these types of questions for later, when the initial awkwardness has already been overcome, perhaps after a shot or two.
Step 5. Use the popular culture theme
It's a reliable argument when it comes to finding material to talk about. Everyone, regardless of taste, has something to say about movies, music, TV shows, books or even the extravagant names that VIPs give their children. When you have an idea of his tastes, you can ask him if he has seen a specific movie, if he has read a special book or if he has heard the new record of a successful group.
- Try asking him for his opinion or advice when it comes to an aspect of popular culture that he thinks he's an expert on. Men love to demonstrate their knowledge in front of an enthralled audience.
- For example, if he loves Woody Allen movies while you've never seen them, ask him which one is best to start with. If you want to be daring, maybe you could ask him to see it together.
- If you can find a subject that you know as well as he does, you are in luck. Impress him with your love for 70s punk bands or your knowledge of the writings of the surrealists. This could be an opportunity to make him think that you are his ideal person.
Step 6. Finish with a grand finale
The last step in a successful conversation is knowing when to gracefully end it. You always have to leave him with the desire to be with you again, certainly not hoping that you will finally go away. After a nice or good sentence, it's time to leave. Tell him you need to go back to work or home. If it went well, he will feel disappointed that you are leaving and will be looking forward to another chance to talk to you.
- If you feel like things were going really well and you like this guy, create the situation or suggest they go out together for coffee or a drink after work. If you are embarrassed to ask him blatantly, do like the girls in the movies and pass him your phone number written on a slip of paper.
- Right before you leave, look him straight in the eye, give him a smile and say "I really enjoyed talking to you." Add his first name. The phrase must sound personal, it is seductive, and definitely more effective than a simple "See you".
Method 3 of 3: Send the Right Signals
Step 1. Laugh and smile
Guys feel more attracted to happy, smiling girls than to those with frowns and diva poses. Smiling makes you friendlier and more approachable before starting a conversation. He will immediately feel more comfortable and will be more willing to open up. Laugh at his jokes, you will stimulate his Ego, he will feel good and all this will make you more seductive in his eyes. A win for both of us.
Step 2. Look him in the eye
Eye contact is among the most important aspects of a successful conversation. Think about it. If you just look away, you will look rude or embarrassed, and still give the impression that you want to be somewhere else rather. Sufficient eye contact communicates confidence and indicates interest, which is exactly what you want to achieve. Don't stare though, that's pretty troubling.
Step 3. Be elegant
Okay, what you want is for this guy to know you're interested, but you don't need to hit him in the face. You can smile, look at him, laugh at his jokes and ask him questions, but be careful not to overdo or hang on his words as if you were an impatient puppy. Keep some mystery and let him make some effort to please you too. Guys like to be hunters, remember?
Step 4. Look after your appearance
Attraction isn't always physical and it shouldn't be. You want a guy to feel attracted to your intelligence, your irony, your sweetness and maybe, why not, your ability to drink a beer in under 7 seconds. But when you want to get a guy's attention, taking care of your image still matters. It doesn't mean wearing high heels, or diva makeup. More than anything, it's about wearing clothes that fit your figure, having clean hair, a good smell and some makeup to draw attention to your most beautiful features, like your lips or eyes.
Step 5. Don't put pressure on him
Asking him questions and trying to get to know him is perfect, but you don't have to scare him. Don't ask him questions that you probably wouldn't even answer yourself. Also, keep the tone of the questions light; don't let him hear in court or at a job interview. Try to be relaxing.
Step 6. Look for physical contact
Lightly brushing his shoulder or hand in the middle of the conversation can give him chills and let him know you're interested, even if you don't say a word. Don't overdo it, do it once or twice throughout the speech and it will achieve the desired effect.
Step 7. Ask him out
This is the goal you wanted to achieve, right? If you've talked to him, if you've decided that you like him and are convinced he likes you too, why not arm yourself with courage and ask him out? It doesn't have to be a romantic or formal date like dinner. Ask him if he would like to have coffee on Fridays after work. It will give you the opportunity to spend time together without it being too much a planned situation. This proposal does not scare at all !!
