Do you only think about the stories your girlfriend had before she got with you? It is a problem that must be addressed promptly, so as to avoid unnecessary suffering and not risk losing the person you love.
Steps
Step 1. Ask yourself why you are always thinking about your girlfriend's past
Are you the one who often introduces the topic in your conversations, also making inappropriate comments? Or maybe you are creating the problem yourself, trying to compare yourself to his exes? Try to figure out what the reason is and identify if your anxiety is due to your girlfriend's wrong attitude, or your own.
Step 2. If your girlfriend is talking about it, then you need to talk to her about it
Let her know how bad it is to hear her talk about her exes and tell her not to do it again. If you don't see any improvement after talking to her, you may need to think carefully about your relationship. The girl may still have feelings for her ex.
Step 3. If you are always thinking about it, try to understand why
Don't have enough self-esteem? Perhaps for this reason you are always fretting about your girlfriend's exes. Why do you torment yourself? You may be a jealous person and tend to compare yourself to other people who have been a part of your girlfriend's life by feeling inadequate. Does she help you overcome the problem? Whatever the reason, however, only you can put an end to certain thoughts.
Step 4. Live in the moment
If your girlfriend's affairs with other people didn't work out, there must be a reason. So why get down and get discouraged, even risking losing her forever? If you are sure that your girlfriend has finally closed with her exes, then there is no reason to torture yourself thinking about them; if you bring up the speech in her presence she too will be annoyed.
Step 5. Don't stifle these feelings
If you realize that your worries are making you feel bad, there is no point trying to banish them. It is important to tackle the problem by also talking about it with your girlfriend, so that once solved it never comes again and does not disturb your serenity even in the future, when you will be even more close and connected to each other.
Advice
- Don't be too hard on yourself. Do not think that her exes are better than you: if the girl has chosen you it means that in her eyes you have an edge (otherwise you would not be together now). Does it tell you about your future? It is a clear signal to understand that he has completely removed his past stories.
- Try to be open-minded and try to understand your girlfriend's reaction and point of view. If she tells you you don't have to worry, there's no point in continuing to hurt yourself. There are sure to be many reasons why she is now with you and no longer with her ex.
- Be honest with yourself by asking yourself why you are always thinking about their past relationships.
Warnings
- If you don't tackle the problem right away, it can come back in the future. At that point the balance of your relationship could be severely affected.
- If you don't confide in your girlfriend, you won't be able to put an end to your worries, even putting your life together at risk.
- If you don't stop thinking about your girlfriend's past, you may one day lose her and pull her away from you. Remember that she has chosen to be with you and not her ex. You are the person who makes her happy, not him.
- Think about how your girlfriend may feel in this situation. She cannot change her past and at the same time she will feel guilty about seeing you feel bad. Don't let your relationship be troubled by unnecessary tension and grudges. Don't make her suffer.
