Going on a date can be a lot of fun for both of you. However, the hardest part, if not the one that scares the most, is when you have to propose to go out. Thankfully, you don't have to leave everything to chance. If you know the psychology behind an invitation, you will be able to better understand the whole process and can increase your chances of success.
Steps
Part 1 of 3: Start the Conversation
Step 1. Don't ask for an appointment right away
By making an invitation on the spot, you risk significantly reducing the chances of the other person accepting. Rather than approaching her and inviting her out, ask her a simple question or ask her a favor first. You can also use this trick to carry on a conversation and get to know each other better before being more direct.
- Try asking her a simple favor. For example, in order to strike up a conversation, you could ask for an indication or advice for a good restaurant nearby.
- After your request, try asking if she'd like to see you again later.
- By asking for a favor first, you'll have about a 15% chance that you'll agree to a date.
- By inviting someone out rather directly, you'll only have a 3% chance that they'll say yes.
Step 2. Try saying something positive
If you approach someone in a public place, it can be difficult to think of a conversation starter. If you want to have a chat, it is better to focus on something beautiful that is in the surrounding environment.
- Don't use the usual phrases to strike up a conversation. They are discouraging and are not considered very spontaneous.
- For example, if you are at the grocery store, you could give an opinion on a certain product, perhaps saying it looks delicious, and ask if she has ever tried it.
- By chatting, you will express interest and will likely prevent the other person from feeling threatened.
Step 3. Keep talking
Once you have started, you need to move on. The key is to listen and pay attention to what the other person is saying, both verbally and with body language. Start chatting gradually and pay attention to the details that your interlocutor offers you, because you could use them to keep the conversation alive.
- Go slowly so that you can find out more about the person you are talking to.
- Adjust to the length of his response. If you talk more about your interlocutor, you may appear self-centered.
- Make sure your answers don't last more than a minute.
- Towards the end of the chat, ask for a date.
Part 2 of 3: Demonstrate Interest
Step 1. Try to make a good first impression
The first impression is formed automatically when two people meet for the first time. These are judgments that arise quickly based on behavior, clothing, appearance and everything that is said during the meeting. A good impression can increase the likelihood that the other person will accept your invitation.
- It can be difficult to change the first impression.
- It can be helpful to look good and dress well to make a good impression.
- Be confident when you greet people and make eye contact.
- The first words are important. Try saying something that demonstrates your character and that you are an intelligent person.
Step 2. Use body language appropriately
There are many non-verbal channels that you can use to convey interest in your interlocutor. By using them in conjunction with verbal communication, you can express self-confidence and make the other person find you interesting.
- Keep your shoulders back and stand straight.
- Occasionally try tilting your head to the side or nodding to show interest.
- You smile. While talking to the other person, put on a nice smile. However, it can be off-putting if it's overdone or too shy.
- Stay closer than you normally would with someone you don't care about.
- Make eye contact. Try not to stare at the other person, but look them straight in the eye just enough to show self-confidence and communicate your attention.
- Speak calmly and relaxed. Don't rush when you talk and take a few breaks when the other person is done talking.
Step 3. Match the right colors when dressing
If you are planning on getting a date or have to meet with a group of people you don't know well, choose the colors of your clothes carefully. Since they can affect the people you are dealing with, you have the opportunity to leave a certain impression on them based on the clothes you wear. Make sure the color of clothing you wear when looking for someone to go out with conveys the right message.
- Men who wear blue are often seen by women as stable and loyal types.
- Women who wear red can communicate passion and power to men.
- Gray can give the impression of neutrality and calm, so it's not ideal when looking for a date.
Part 3 of 3: Ask for an Appointment
Step 1. Make the appointment sound like a suggestion
If you're going to ask someone what plans they have and if they want to go out with you, the best way to do this is to take an indirect approach. This will make the other person feel less obligated and allow them to answer honestly. When you invite her out, she always asks the question indirectly.
Ask what his plans are. If she doesn't have any, post your proposal and ask if she'd like to join you
Step 2. Make the appointment appear as if it were an idea started by your interlocutor
When you ask someone out, try phrasing your request in such a way that the other person sees it as their idea. Often people have less difficulty following their own way of thinking and therefore, in this case, whoever you are in front of you will be more likely to accept a date.
For example, ask if there is a good restaurant nearby. When he suggests one, you reply by saying that the name sounds great, and since he recommended it to you, try suggesting that they go together sometime
Step 3. Explain the benefits
When you invite someone on a date, you may want to formulate your request in a way that highlights the benefits of what you are proposing. If you give reasons why it would be a good idea to go out with you, the other person will be more likely to accept your invitation.
Explain why it is worth going to a certain place. If your interlocutor likes the idea, tell him that you also want to go to that place and suggest that they do it together
Step 4. Invite directly
Some do not like the turns of the word, because they feel they are being manipulated. If you feel that the person you are going to ask for a date prefers a more direct approach, do this. It is an approach that avoids any mistakes or misunderstandings and goes straight to the point.
Just ask if the other person would like to go out on the day you thought of
Advice
- Don't use typical pickup phrases.
- Be spontaneous and show your personality.
- Do not be shy. Try to always look confident and relaxed.
- Don't neglect personal hygiene and wear clean clothes.
