What do you do when you are young, and would you really like to have the money for the latest video game, mountain bike or pair of sneakers? Virtually anything! There is no "right" way to convince your parents to buy you something you want, but there are various techniques you can use to persuade mom and dad. If you are ready to try to convince them, here are a couple of effective strategies!
Steps
Part 1 of 3: Direct Confrontation with Parents
Step 1. Explain to them the productive benefits of what you want
Unless you're really lucky (or privileged), there's a good chance you won't get very far by simply asking your parents something "why do you want it". This is the kind of reasoning very young children do - how many times have you heard a five-year-old scream, "But I want it!" during a scene? Rather, be smart. Describe what you want as something that will help you in some way - will it help you study? Will it help you improve in sports? Tell your parents how that something will help you achieve some benefit. Try to remember this often in conversation.
Example: Kim is 13 and would like a tablet device to be able to play games, listen to music and share photos with her friends. However, last week Kim's parents scolded her for being a slacker and not doing her homework. When she goes to her parents for a tablet, she should focus on the wide variety of educational apps available on the model she wants, not her recreational potential.
Step 2. Offer to do something in return
Your parents may not want to buy what you want so much just because you "could" use it for charity. Sweeten the deal! Offer to do something for your parents if they will buy you what you want. Make a plan to rake the garden or take out the trash for a month, for example. You should have an idea of the things your parents like - for starters, many parents like to see that a child is more responsible for housework and spends a lot of time studying or pursuing a healthy hobby (such as sports, music, theater, etc.).
- When you contract with your parents, start with a low offer. Instead of saying that you will walk the dog every day for two months, say that you will do it for a week. They will likely raise the stakes - and that's okay. If you will eventually have to take the dog out for a month, that's always better than if you left and offered to do it for two months.
- Example: Kim's parents don't seem to respond positively to Kim's attempts to justify the need for a tablet. Kim's next move is to offer to garden in the yard. She says she'll do it for two weeks - her parents might make her do it for longer, but everything is fine for her up to a month and a half.
Step 3. Offer a challenge to your parents
If you're feeling really brave, don't be afraid to give your parents an ultimatum. Tell them that if they buy you what you want, you will ensure that you get good results (for example, you will strive to get all the marks from 6 upwards in your next report card). This is risky - you are basically betting that you will be able to keep a promise "after" you get what you want. This is a great choice if your parents tend to forget things (or forgive them) and it's a bad choice if your parents consider a direct challenge as something impertinent and disrespectful.
- If you can, try to incorporate the thing you want into the challenge. If you want a new pair of sneakers, for example, tell your parents that you will wear them to run the half marathon next month.
- Example: Kim told her parents that she would like a smartphone because it would help her from a school standpoint. He supports his request by saying that, using the tablet apps as a study aid, he will get a high grade in the next math test.
Step 4. Research the product
Make sure you know the product you want (and all possible alternatives) like the back of your hand. The more you know the product, the more serious you will seem towards your parents. Be prepared to name specific alternatives to the desired product (especially if they are cheaper).
- Take a tour of the online stores or in your area to get an idea of the prices of the item you want. You will need to be able to explain to your parents what the lowest possible price for a particular product is, including possible refunds, discounts, etc.
- Example: When Kim turns to her parents to ask for the tablet she wants, she will tell them the lowest price she has found on the internet, taking into consideration the special offers for which you have to sign up via email to contact the seller. She will also be ready to offer a cheaper product, sold by the competition, in case the parents say no.
Step 5. Find excuses
If you can't make any progress by explaining how the product you want can help you, you may be successful by focusing on "why" you deserve it. Were you particularly good? Have you recently achieved something difficult? Tell your parents, for example, that you have been through such difficult times this year and that product would be the perfect thing to help you relax.
Example: Kim just had to spend a weekend at the home of a hateful aunt who loves to pinch her cheeks. When she asks her parents for the tablet she wants, she is quick to describe, in painful detail, how awful it was.
Step 6. Write your parents a compelling letter
Stubborn parents can be influenced if you show them that you are really serious with a well-written letter. Use the most formal tone possible, paying particular attention to spelling and grammar. Describe to your parents the many advantages of the object, how it will help you grow as a person, and why you deserve to have it.
Step 7. Talk to other people
Your parents have acquaintances and friends, just like you! They are influenced by the words and opinions of these people as you are influenced by your own friends. If you have the chance, talk to someone about this product, describing how useful it would be and how much you deserve it. If you are lucky, he could talk to your parents about it, perhaps giving them the last "push" to give in.
Example: Kim has an uncle who dotes on her, who thinks she is simply the prettiest. At the next family gathering, Kim will make sure to tell her uncle how much she would like to have a tablet to help with her homework.
Step 8. Be ready to compromise
You can not Always Get What You Want! If your parents just don't give in, be ready to accept a lower offer. You may have to do half (or more) of the shopping with your parents. You may even come to accept a cheaper or less exciting product for you. Take what you can get - it's always better than nothing!
Example: Kim's parents eventually give in - they offer to buy her a tablet as long as she pays half the cost and does more housework. Kim wisely accepts the offer - turning down now would mean she doesn't really value the tablet as a potential homework aid.
Part 2 of 3: Putting an Idea in Parents' Heads
Step 1. Probe the waters
In the presence of a parent, or both, casually mention the thing you want without letting them know that you desperately want it. Just use a sentence or two, describing it simply as "fantastic" or "exceptional". Observe your parents' reaction without showing it. Do they seem to have noticed? Did their antennas stand up? Maybe you just gave your parents a good idea for your birthday present!
Example: Jason has his eye on a new pair of flamboyant basketball shoes. At dinner, while his parents are talking about the last Lakers game, he throws a little clue into the conversation by saying, “Did you see that Kobe dunk? It must have been because he was wearing those fantastic Jordans shoes”.
Step 2. Send very clear signals when the holidays are approaching
If Christmas, Hanukkah or another holiday where it is customary to exchange gifts is upon us, don't waste your wish by begging your parents to give you a gift. Rather, benefit from the holidays! Before a gift-giving event, a parent will start searching and listening to figure out what gift to give to their children spontaneously - something they usually keep in mind for months. Usually, it's okay to hint to your parents in a polite way with an idea for a gift (or, provide great clues) before the holidays.
- Don't ask for too many things - by focusing on something you "really" want, you will increase the chances of getting it.
- Example: Christmas is upon us and Jason still wants new shoes. The next time he takes two shots for a field goal with his dad, he might say something pretty blatant, like “Dad, I can hardly keep up with you. It's the fault of these worn shoes, I think. If only I had the new Jordans!"
Step 3. Make this object appear in your parents' lives
The more your parents randomly find the object you want, the more likely they are to catch your clues! Leave the magazines open on the page where the product is advertised. If your family uses a co-op computer, "casually" leave advertisements for the product open when you know someone else will be using the computer. If you have a digital video recorder in your family, use your parents' favorite shows to throw other clues about the product. Do whatever you can to make sure you don't go a day when your parents don't see or hear about the thing you want with all your heart!
- Parents may not really notice. For best results, repeat things over and over.
- Example: Jason's family uses a computer in shared mode. Whenever Jason has finished using the computer, he makes sure to leave an internet page open for the shop that sells the shoes he wants.
Step 4. Plan a visit to the store
If your parents really don't seem to be picking up on the clues, taking a trip to the store can help get them to see the product in person. Find a good excuse to go to the store - for example, you may have to go to department stores in your city to buy a pencil or paper for school. While you are there, go to the product you want inside the store. Pretend to be surprised to see it, and at the same time repeat how awesome you think it is. If you're lucky, your parents might consider buying it for you in the future with phrases like "Maybe for your birthday".
Example: it is the time of reopening of the schools and Jason needs a new backpack. Jason knows that, in his hometown mall, the shoe shop is right next to the shop that sells the backpacks. As she walks past the shop windows with her mom, she stops and says “Wow! Look at those shoes. They are really great! They even have that fantastic velcro strap like the ones that professional basketball players use”. His mom replies, “Well, the basketball season starts in a few months. We can buy them later ". Victory!
Part 3 of 3: Show Your Parents You Deserve It
Step 1. Be responsible
Parents are more likely to buy something for children who respect their duties - children who study hard, behave politely, and do household chores without complaining. Give your parents a reason to reward you! Don't respond badly to your mom, even when she's totally annoying. Offer to help your dad make dinner. Quit when asked to (without complaining). Do whatever you can to show your parents that you are ready for the responsibility of having this new item you want.
Step 2. Be mature
Parents love when their children act like adults. Show them that you are mature through your behavior. Be polite to everyone you meet, even if you find them annoying or stupid. Always look for a way to be useful to people. Engage in new hobbies with satisfaction. Basically, try to be a pleasant person and show that you work as much as possible. Not even many adults are that mature - if you are, you will look particularly deserving.
One of the biggest mistakes you can make is making a scene if your parents don't buy you what you want (even worse if you do it in public!). An important sign of being an adult is to accept rejection with education and dignity. Don't beg on your knees, don't protest, and don't make a scene if you don't get what you want
Step 3. Save some money
When an adult wants something, he usually buys it himself. If you really want something, a good way to show that you really want it is to start saving some money. Working to earn and save some money when you are very young is a fantastic sign of maturity. When your parents see that you are serious, they may offer to help you buy what you want by covering part of the expenses. If not, keep saving - if you set aside a little money every week, resisting the desire to spend it on small vices (such as candy or toys), you will probably be surprised at how quickly you accumulate it!
Make sure your parents know you are saving money to buy that product. You can tell them directly or give them some visual reminders - for example, a vase in the kitchen that you slowly fill with pennies
Advice
- Begging and begging on your knees and trying to play the part of the little angel are not recommended behaviors.
- The use of brute force is not recommended.
- If, for example, you want a bunny from the Sylvanian collection, you can definitely find some at lower prices on eBay or Amazon. Show your parents what you want and don't tell them you want it, just list the features you like, maybe the face or the dress. This might make them think.
- Instead of asking your parents to buy you something, ask your aunt, your uncle, your grandparents, anyone! Try asking someone else. Don't worry if you've asked everyone and get multiple gifts of the same size. Ask the person who gave you the gift to give you the receipt so you can return the item, or ask whoever gave it to you if they want it, or you can simply give it to one of your friends, or to charity, or the like. As a last resort, you can also keep it in reserve. For example, if the gift you want is a hair dryer, you can keep a spare in case the first one breaks.
Warnings
- If you know the thing you want can be broken easily, or if it's something you can only use once or twice and it will bore you, don't ask for it unless you desperately want it.
- Make sure you ask your parents when they are in a good mood.
- Make sure you never say that if you don't get that thing you desperately want, you won't do what your parents ask of you, especially homework or other educational activities.
- Make sure you really want this thing and you won't abandon it right away after begging and begging for it.
- If your parents say no, and they get angry, give them some respite. And try to ask him again when I'm in a better mood.
- Think about your family. Maybe your parents can't afford to buy you something now.
- Becoming too anxious can lead to depression, anxiety disorders, panic attacks.
- Don't act immature and stupid.
- The object you want may not be suitable for you.
