Many have no problem opening up to anyone; after all, they think they have nothing to hide. However, to really spark a person's interest, playing mystery is a much better tactic. If you want people to ask "What will this girl ever be hiding?", Read on.
Steps
Part 1 of 3: Mysterious True Thinking
Step 1. Be yourself
Have you ever met a person who is very different from you? So different that her way of seeing things fascinated you irresistibly? It didn't seem mysterious to you by nature, but because of your differences. The surefire way to stand out from everyone else? Be yourself.
Seriously, think about it. When a man and a woman date, the mystery factor arises due to different viewpoints and behaviors. Man sees woman darting in a purely feminine world, knowing that she will never be part of it, and vice versa. The same goes for your world - it's unique, regardless of gender or relationship you have with someone
Step 2. Believe in yourself
To be truly yourself in today's world (the one that the media bombard with images that praise the need to conform and succumb to the prevailing trends), you must be sure of yourself. When you are faced with two options, sink or float, you can do nothing but choose the second. And then people love self-confident people: they are magnetic, persuasive, attractive and admirable, and often you don't even understand why.
There is nothing mysterious about people with low self-esteem. When everything you do is influenced by the question "Will people accept me?" and this haunts you, you do not grasp the potential of your charm, you are not attractive and it is very easy for others to notice your underlying insecurity. The person who believes in himself, the one who feels perfectly at ease in his own skin, assertive and who knows how to assert himself, is the one to whom everyone feels irresistibly attracted. Everyone looks at her and realizes that she has a certain I don't know what
Step 3. Stay calm
People who are an open book don't leave much room for imagination. After talking to them a couple of times, you know what they eat, what makes them happy and what makes them depressed. But if you are a perpetually calm person, no one will ever know what happens to you. Nonetheless, this can be counterproductive: others will do anything to find out.
In difficult situations, show a calm attitude. And, if you really need to show an emotion, demonstrate one that is not necessarily related to the circumstance
Step 4. Be courteous
Since the adjective "mysterious" is often used as a synonym for "gloomy" and "detached", it is important to evade these negative thoughts with a good education. Being mysterious doesn't mean being rude or unpleasant. Don't get confused! Everyone deserves to be treated well, regardless of how you want to look.
A good place to start is to always have a hint of a smile. Not only will it make you seem friendlier and more approachable, people will ask themselves, "What's going on in her mind?" You know what we're talking about: surely you ask yourself this question when you meet someone on the street who smiles or laughs to himself
Step 5. Don't be afraid to look weird
Over the years, we gradually get a better idea of what society expects of us and how we should behave in public. This is necessary in order not to give in to impulses that would not be accepted or that could cause you problems with the law. But you can listen to those quirky impulses that wouldn't get you in trouble. When a waiter asks you what you want to order, try to answer him like this: "I could tell you, but then I should kill you." Say it with a totally deadpan expression to accentuate the effect.
While not the most sophisticated of tactics, it will lead people to wonder what will ever go through your head. And it can be fun. So, before ordering a shrimp salad, say, "I'm allergic to shellfish." When asked why you ordered this dish, tell them that you will find a way to remedy the problem
Part 2 of 3: Interacting with Others
Step 1. Don't go into too much detail
When people ask you questions, you generally understand what they want to know. If someone asks you "Are you engaged?", You know that in reality they are also implicitly asking you "And with whom? Since when?". Instead of saying "Yes, my boyfriend is called Andrea Bianchi", answer: "Yes". He will not be able to understand if it is appropriate to investigate further, but he would like to, ah, if he would like to!
- Try to summarize the stories accurately based on the facts, without going into any detail. Don't put personal comments here and there - just stick to what happened.
- Let's assume your boyfriend asks you about your ex. Instead of talking and talking about why it didn't work out, say, "We didn't get along. When the relationship ended, I stopped thinking about it." Simple. Maybe a little blunt, but straight to the point and honest.
Step 2. Don't let them read you
Most of our interactions with people are non-verbal. Our gestures and our body "explain" by themselves how we feel at a given moment. Keep this in mind and consciously take advantage of the patterns that others rely so heavily on to understand someone. Have you ever seen a James Bond movie? He gets all serious when he makes a joke, and even when he tries to win a woman he has an attitude that doesn't show too many emotions. Here, that's a mysterious man. Inspired by his way of doing.
When interacting with someone, check their body position. Experiment by changing the way you port and observing the reactions of your interlocutor. Play with your tone of voice and eye contact. This person must be left with a very specific doubt: what were you feeling?
Step 3. Turn your attention to others
This step is surprisingly easy. When you talk to someone, all you have to do is ask them questions to get them to tell you more. When he leaves, he will get the idea that you are great at conversation, without realizing that he has not acquired even a new information about you. Long story short, people love to talk about themselves, so take advantage of it.
Ask open questions. When you spot an interesting topic, use it to your advantage. Encourage your interlocutor to speak. Behave in a genuinely interested way to keep him going. You will seem nice and a good listener. Although you don't intervene that much, he'll think it's fun to be around you. Seen? It's easy
Step 4. Talk about facts
When the conversation is actually about you, you prefer to talk about concrete things, not opinions, beliefs or experiences. This way, you can contribute to the conversation without giving any real information about yourself.
Instead of saying, "You know, the other day, while I was killing time before going out with Sonia, I read an article on the internet. It explained that drinking an extra liter of water a day can promote long-term weight loss.. I will definitely try. Exercise is not enough ", you prefer:" Some research says that increasing water consumption can lead to significant weight loss. It seems to be a valid trick to lose weight. " You will give the same information without exposing yourself too much
Step 5. Be mysteriously absent
To be invited to parties often, the first few times you have to show up when they propose you to go to an event. However, after these people get to know you and learn to like you, take the liberty of mysteriously absent yourself. Don't always show up. Let everyone wonder where you are. Arrive late. Go away first without giving an explanation. It raises doubts.
Don't always do it. If you always leave a party out of the blue, it will become an annoying behavior that everyone will expect. If you never go to an event, they won't invite you again. So, as with anything else, choose your battles
Step 6. Leave your past shrouded in mystery
If you are new to the city and want others to feel intrigued by you, don't talk about your past. You will be surprised: by avoiding bringing up your story, there will be so much information about you that you will not have to give. When someone asks you where you are from, you answer like this: "It doesn't matter where we've been, only where we're going." Or, you could say "From Rome", without adding any details. You will arouse a lot of interest around you.
If hiding the past is difficult for you, pretend it's a game. Tell everyone that you lived for a few years in Vietnam, where you worked on a farm. Then, you moved to your hometown, where you were hired as a chef in an upscale restaurant. Finally, between one thing and another, he says that for a year you went out with a famous person. Try to cultivate a striking image
Part 3 of 3: Cultivating a Mysterious Personality
Step 1. Maintain perfect posture
Keeping your shoulders hunched shows insecurity, and instead of conveying an aura of mystery, you will pass for a shy or lonely person, which is not the effect you want. The perfect posture is to pull the breastbone out, move the shoulders back and keep the belly in. If you don't have good posture, practice to improve it. Having perfect posture will make you look more attractive and confident, things that will positively attract the attention of both men and women.
Step 2. Try to have a unique sense of style
Unfortunately, clothing is used very often to label people, or at least it gives the feeling that it can. Are you wearing a scarf and a pair of thick-rimmed black glasses? You are a hipster. Are you wearing a low-cut shirt and a miniskirt? You are no good. Do your pants reach your knees and your shoes are unfastened? We are not. So instead of adapting to a label, create your own.
If there's something you like, just flaunt it. You can mix different styles in one look, or change your way of dressing often. One day, put on a pair of black-framed lenses, as if you were a hipster; the next, he wears designer clothes; the next one, sport a shirt you made yourself. You can also mix these three elements in one go. You choose your style
Step 3. Choose hobbies that don't require you to socialize
If you met a typical soccer player, you would probably think, "Okay, he's athletic, he's not doing so well in school, he likes to go out on weekends and he has a perfect girlfriend." If you met a classic "nerd", you'd think, "He's a bit of an introvert. Smart. He doesn't have many friends. He has a good relationship with his family. In general, he's kind. Maybe he plays a lot of video games." While these are just stereotypes and aren't completely correct, mix them up for your own image. You can be a girl who loves wearing makeup and dressing up in a provocative way, but who always has a book in her hand. You can be a saxophonist and a football fan. You can mix everything.
The more dynamic you are, the harder it will be to get into a compartment. When people are attributed certain characteristics, it stops being mysterious. So, get noticed while trying something you usually wouldn't do. Not only will you be mysterious, you may also discover something that you really like very much, but that you would never have considered
Step 4. Don't show too many emotions
When people can get a reaction from you, they will take advantage of it. If they know what makes you angry or excited, they think they have a certain influence on you. Avoid letting your feelings leak out, so they won't understand you and consequently won't be able to label you. When a person fails to grasp what they hear, they will never know the truth. They will never know your tastes, what you hate or what you stand for. And they're not used to this: most people can't shut up!
In addition, you should also turn down the volume of the voice. Have you ever noticed? People who tend to scream are never mysterious. Nobody would have any doubts about them because they let everyone know. When talking to someone, keep your voice down, whisper if appropriate, and put on an indecipherable expression. Others will think you are talking about them, but they will never know for sure. It's fun to be mysterious, isn't it?
Step 5. Little notice of your online presence
You know those people who update their Facebook profile every six seconds with phrases like "I forgot to have dinner" and so on? Don't be like them. Those people do nothing but ruin the reputation of social networks. Don't post photos of whatever you eat, don't post self-portraits taken in the bathroom because you were bored, don't try to express delicate and deep emotions. When you have something to say online, make sure it's worth reading.
The truth is, we don't need to know what a person is doing every single moment. The less we know, the better for everyone. If you want to be mysterious, let people wonder where you are, with whom and what you are doing. Therefore, avoid letting everyone know where you are or write status on trivial daily life actions. Resist the temptation to put a hashtag every time you post something. Social networks are useful, but don't use them to tell the whole world every single thing you do
Step 6. Prove that you are mysterious in every area of your life
There are billions of ideas from which to draw inspiration to be considered inscrutable. Some are immediate, like wearing a pair of dark sunglasses, others more elaborate: you can create a room inspired by the Gothic style and at the same time as that of the princesses, trace the quotation marks in the air saying very normal phrases like Today I went to the "post office", wear a cloak. How far are you willing to go?
Want to have fun? Pretend to be someone else. When you go to a party, use another name and ask those in attendance if they have noticed anything suspicious, as if you were doing an investigation. It's not quite like being yourself, but it can be quite fun
Advice
- Don't tell anyone about your attempts to be mysterious, otherwise you won't be.
- Try to use words that people will have to search for after talking to you.
- Do not use abbreviations when sending a message, write in full. It's not the best in comfort, but it helps you develop your character and get yourself taken seriously.
- Try not to fit into the stereotype of the "mysterious". Strange as it sounds, once you get a label, the mystery will diminish exponentially.
- The trick is to stand out while adapting to others. This means they will recognize your unique personality without you having to look too bold.
- Try to understand why you want to be mysterious. Is it a game or do you have another reason?
Warnings
- Being mysterious doesn't mean you can't have friends. You can have many and still surround yourself with an aura of mystery. It all depends on how you behave and present yourself.
- Being too mysterious may make people, especially your parents, think that you are doing something shady. Control yourself and don't overdo it.
- Some might consider you weird. Don't take it as an offense, but as a compliment.
- People may start to think you don't like them anymore. He will stop calling you because he will not want to bother you and will ignore you by switching to something else. If you want to keep your friends close, don't go overboard with your mysterious doings. It's not worth being a loner, no matter how fun it is to intrigue others.
- They might call you moody.
