What is the secret of perseverance? Putting one foot in front of the other will take you to the finish line, but there are tools you can use to tackle obstacles, reach your goals and really enjoy the process, rather than living for the day. Believing in yourself, living by your principles, and nurturing your spiritual side are just some of the ways you can strengthen your intention to keep moving forward.
Steps
Part 1 of 3: Strengthen your decisions
Step 1. Identify what you want
Maybe your goal is precise: you want to climb Everest, quit smoking, or find a better job. Or it could be a more general goal, like becoming a better member of your family or a happier person. Either way, the path to achieving your goals will be clearer if you take the time to think and prepare thoroughly.
- If you have a specific goal in mind, draw a trajectory to help you achieve it. Do your research to find the necessary steps along the way. If it helps, create a table that will help you achieve your goal. Give yourself a deadline for each step.
- Whatever your goal, be prepared to invest time and effort. Developing the mental strength to persist takes a lot of training, but you can start immediately.
Step 2. Get rid of indecision
The first hurdle you will likely encounter will be correcting your low self-esteem. It is very difficult to make progress unless you believe you can persevere. No matter how unattainable your goals may seem now, you have the intelligence and strength to get where you want. If your goal is to solve problems and face life's adversities with grace, you can do that too.
- Don't compare yourself to others. In this way you will go towards insecurity. You have the strength to persevere using your unique strengths and talents, and your path will be different from that of others.
- If there are things in your life that undermine your self-esteem, get rid of them. For example, if you tend to fall back into bad habits like drinking, abusing drugs, or eating only junk food, it will be harder to see yourself as someone with the mental strength to persist. Take steps to stop your addictions and bad habits.
- Spend your time doing things you are good at. Exercising your skills, such as a sport, an art, cooking, reading, sewing or gardening, is a great way to increase your self-esteem. Invest your time in activities that make you feel fulfilled and satisfied with your life.
Step 3. Practice staying calm
Being overly conditioned by stressful and small unexpected events takes a lot of energy - energy that could be devoted to something more productive. Part of perseverance is developing the ability not to be swayed by the little things. This is much easier said than done, but you can start practicing right now. The next time you find yourself standing in line or stuck in traffic, or starting to heat up over someone's stupid comment, stay calm by using the following technique:
- Think before you speak or act. Think about it for a couple of minutes before doing anything. Think about the importance of the issue from a global point of view.
- As you think, you feel the anger or irritation move through your body, then feel it diminish.
- Take 5 deep breaths. Breathe in order to stretch your stomach when you inhale, and then contract it as you exhale. Inhale through the nose and exhale through the mouth.
- Get on with your day, dealing with the situation in a relaxed and appropriate way. If you are in line, wait patiently for your turn (and don't blame the person behind the counter when it's your turn). If someone made an annoying comment, respond with a smile and forget it. You have more important things to think about.
Step 4. Don't get discouraged by those who hate
While you are on the road to your goal, or simply commit yourself to persevering in your daily life, you may meet people who are skeptical about your abilities or your possibility of getting what you want. Don't be swayed. Know that people are usually negative as a result of their own problems and the issues they are facing.
- If the goal you are trying to achieve is important, like climbing Everest, you will meet people who will tell you that you can't do it. It's all part of the journey. Believe in yourself, and think about when you will prove them wrong.
- If there are particularly negative people in your life who seem intent on preventing you from being successful, it's okay to both stop dating them and limit the time you spend with them.
Step 5. Recognize your values
Through the awareness of your personal values you can discover the best way to proceed in any given situation and stay focused on the goal. What are your core principles? What do you stand for, and how is your life affected? The answers to these questions are not simple, but with each experience you will get closer to understanding yourself and your worldview. These things can also be helpful:
- Learn about many different perspectives. Even if you feel convinced about a certain topic, listen to the opposite point of view. Learn as much as you can about the topics you care about.
- If you are religious, delve deeply into the teachings of your creed. Talk about ethics and morals with anyone.
- Meditate. Explore your mind and learn to listen to your subconscious.
Step 6. Find out if you are enjoying life
Perseverance can take endless hours of boring or extremely difficult work. In any case, knowing that you invest your time for goals, life will have a predominantly positive tinge. You are not just surviving, you are living life to the full. If fear and discontent have infiltrated and you are no longer enjoying the challenges, you may want to change your approach.
- It doesn't mean that life won't be upsetting sometimes as you pursue your goals. Over time, you will distinguish temporary frustration from lasting negativity.
- What tools do you have to help you be more positive? For example, you could spend time with your best friend, to have a shoulder to cry on in difficult times, or you could take a few minutes for a run with your dog to disconnect your mind.
Part 2 of 3: Coping with obstacles
Step 1. Face reality
Being able to face life's challenges is a big plus, but it can be very difficult to do. When a big problem arises, it's much easier to ignore it, mellow it out, or postpone the solution. Practice seeing obstacles for what they are, so you understand the best way to avoid, overcome, or deal with them.
- Be honest with yourself. If you have strayed from your goal, acknowledge it. For example, if your goal is to publish a book, and you haven't started writing, face facts instead of making excuses.
- Do not blame those who have no faults. You haven't started running because your boss gives you too much work to do, your kids misbehave or it's too cold outside - do you recognize yourself in these sentences? Remember the control you have over your life, and use it to move forward, even at the cost of starting from the first step.
- Avoid escape. Big problems can be temporarily avoided by resorting to alcohol, TV, drugs, food, video games - but only temporarily. If you find yourself procrastinating because you are too busy to address the important issues, the problem will only grow in the meantime.
Step 2. Consider your choices carefully
Making wise, reasoned decisions instead of impulsive ones will get you further, faster. Whenever you encounter an obstacle, consider the matter from each angle before taking action. There is always more than one way to handle a problem, and you want to find out which way makes the most sense without taking shortcuts.
- Ask for advice from those who are wiser than you. Others can be of great help when it comes to making important decisions. If you know people who have been through this before, ask them how they dealt with the situation. Just remember to take advice with a grain of salt, especially if it comes from people involved in the aftermath.
- It can also be helpful to have a couple of role models - people in your life, celebrities, spiritual figures - with values that match yours. Asking yourself what those people would do in a given situation could help you take the right path.
Step 3. Listen to your conscience
It is the deciding factor. What do you think is the right thing to do? Being guided by your conscience is always the best choice, even if it makes you take an apparent step back. When you act according to your conscience, you can be sure that you have done your best. In case of subsequent doubts or confusion, the awareness of having acted according to conscience will help you to overcome it.
Sometimes the right path is clear, other times less so. Do what you can to see clearly, whether it is meditating, going to a religious ceremony, writing a diary or other activity that helps you tidy up your thoughts
Step 4. Stand up for your reasons
After you've made a decision that you know is right, stand up for it with all your might. Persevere against all criticisms, difficulties and doubts. It takes courage to follow one's beliefs, especially when they are not popular. But you can gain strength and confidence from the awareness that you have weighed your options carefully and acted based on your firm beliefs.
Step 5. Learn from your mistakes
You won't always find your way on the first try. Wisdom comes from making a lot of mistakes and trying something new every time. Reflect on what happened and find out what you can gain from that experience, then apply what you have learned to the next obstacle you will have to overcome.
Even the strongest people fail. Don't fall into the vortex of self-pity when something goes wrong. Rather, develop a new strategy to achieve your goal, knowing that the outcome will be different next time
Part 3 of 3: Conserve strength
Step 1. Keep your body and mind healthy
When your mind is obscured and your body out of shape, it can be much more difficult to cope with difficult times and achieve your goals. Taking daily steps to stay healthy will be very helpful on the road to perseverance. Here are some things to keep in mind:
- Eat healthy. Make sure you eat plenty of nutritious, seasonal fruits and vegetables. Eat grains, meats, and healthy fats. Try not to eat too many processed foods.
- Get enough sleep. A good night's sleep can be the difference between a good day and a bad day. Get 7-8 hours of sleep a night when possible.
- Move. Whether it's walking, yoga, running, biking, swimming or other activities, move as much as you can. Exercise puts you in a good mood and keeps you fit for any challenge you expect. An exercise regime of 30 minutes a day is an excellent starting point.
Step 2. Be part of a community
Surround yourself with people who know and support you as you work towards your goals. Support other people in turn by becoming an integral part of a community. Be someone you can rely on, and have no qualms about reaching out to them when needed.
- Be a son, daughter, brother, parent and trustworthy friend. Having close ties with family and friends will help you through the darkest times.
- Get involved in the community you live in. Volunteering, classes, city assemblies, the local sports team, are all great ways to feel part of something bigger.
Step 3. Keep everything in perspective
Instead of living for the day, look further away. Know that all adversity will pass, and do your best to face it gracefully and forcefully, so that you can be proud of yourself, looking back. Understand that although your problems are important, they are no more important than those of others. Get an idea of the immensity of the world, and interact with it as much as you can.
- Reading books and articles and following the news can help you stay connected and aware, and put everything in perspective.
- Get out of your mind and try to see things through the eyes of others sometimes. Take your granddaughter for ice cream, or visit your aunt at the nursing home.
Step 4. Cultivate your spirituality
Many find that honing a sense of belonging to something greater gives comfort and energy. A spiritual life can help you find purpose when you don't know who to turn to.
- If you are religious, attend ceremonies regularly. If you pray, do it often.
- Practice meditation and other forms of spiritual awareness.
- Spend time in the midst of nature, and allow yourself to admire the wonders of the forests, oceans, rivers and the open sky.
Step 5. Stay true to yourself
You will persevere if you continue to match your actions with your values. When some element of your life starts to look strange, change it. Keep correcting the trajectory until you reach your goal.
Advice
- Winners never give up, those who give up never win.
- Try to avoid those who always say no. It will put you off for the sake of it.
- Seek advice from those with more experience, and others who have been successful in your field.
