It is important for children to develop social skills. Social interaction can foster personal relationships and professional careers. There are many ways to help them improve these skills. Begin by explaining the basic principles of good manners and kindness. Then keep them engaged in something that allows them to strengthen their interpersonal skills, perhaps through a group activity or sport. If you have the impression that they find it difficult to develop an adequate attitude to socialization, contact a professional for external help.
Steps
Part 1 of 4: Explain the Basic Principles
Step 1. Explain the concept of personal space
One of the fundamental principles for acquiring social skills is personal space. Often children fail to understand that each individual has their own personal space that should be respected.
- Explain to the child that personal space changes in relation to individuals and the culture to which they belong. Closer figures, such as relatives and siblings, may be more open to physical contact than strangers. Likewise, the culture of origin can affect how much personal space people need.
- Try telling him how to interpret body language. Teach him that if a person is tense, folds his arms and backs away, it is a sign that his personal space has been invaded.
- You should explain that he too has a right to personal space. So, don't take him without his permission and don't hug him if he doesn't want to. Let him know that he has the power to manage his body.
- Teach him to behave in the same way. Get them to ask for permission before hugging someone, sitting on their lap, and so on.
Step 2. Teach empathy
Empathy is another cornerstone of social skills. A young child's point of view is quite limited, so they may have a hard time understanding how to put themselves in another person's shoes. Therefore, help him understand what empathy is.
- Encourage him to use his imagination. Get him to immerse himself in a number of different situations. Take advantage of various opportunities that arise throughout the day to understand and learn. For example, if your child tells you that he saw someone at school who was annoyed, encourage him to imagine how he would feel under similar circumstances.
- When watching a movie or TV show, ask them what a character might think and why. Invite him to relate and think about how he would feel.
Step 3. Help the child understand how to engage in a conversation
For the development of social skills it is essential to know how to dialogue, albeit in an elementary form. Often young children are able to participate in a conversation and risk interrupting the interlocutors or ignoring what they say. Talk to your child about the basics of conversation.
- Explain how to start a conversation. Teach him to greet people by saying "Hi!" and “How are you?” Also talk to him about the gestures that accompany meeting people, such as shaking and shaking hands, smiling and nodding.
- Explain that in order to speak, he must wait his turn. Tell him that, before speaking, he has to wait until the interlocutor has finished speaking. Also, teach him to listen. He points out that during a conversation it is a good idea to respond to what the other person is saying rather than just talking about himself.
- Also teach him to communicate assertively when talking to people. Explain that assertiveness is not synonymous with aggression, but it means expressing wishes and needs in an honest and direct way. People who communicate assertively do not threaten, insult, and make no excuses to get what they want.
Step 4. Teach him the basics of good manners
Children do not know the rules of good manners, so it is important that they learn them. Explain to your child that it is necessary to say "please", "thank you", "excuse me" and use other forms of courtesy. Have everyone in the house make their requests with courtesy and thanks. This way he will learn to behave politely.
Step 5. Talk about how wishes and needs are expressed
It often happens that children are insolent when they try to express what they want or need. For example, your daughter might tell her older brother he's stupid if he doesn't let her play a game. In such cases, what she tries to communicate is that she doesn't want to feel left out. Therefore, teach your children to appropriately express what they want and need.
- Correct them as soon as they get it wrong. You may hear your child complaining that his sister is hogging a toy. In this case, intervene by saying: "Carla, what Pietro means is that he wants to play too. Tell him you don't want to exclude him."
- He teaches to be direct when someone makes him difficult. A preschooler can kick and hit when he feels teased. Instead, teach him to use words. Let him know that when he feels laughed at, he should react by saying, "You hurt me when you talk to me like this, so stop it, please."
- When he's upset, get him to stop and think. If a child isn't sure what he wants or needs, ask him a few questions to help him realize this. For example, ask him, "Why does this make you angry and react like this?"
Part 2 of 4: Finding Activities That Develop Social Skills
Step 1. Read some stories to your children
Fiction has been shown to promote empathy in children and adults. Therefore, to guide you in the choice of stories, give preference to texts of a certain quality over the more popular ones, because generally in works conceived for a mass audience the events and character of the characters are less articulated. Children's classics, such as The Little Prince and Charlotte's Web, can help them develop empathic skills and improve social skills throughout their lives.
Step 2. Lead by example
A great way to help your child gain social skills is to set a good example through behavior. Therefore, respect people in everyday life. If you take it to the grocery store, politely address the cashier. When you pick him up from school, be kind and courteous to other parents, teachers, and school employees. Children look at their parents and assimilate good habits by observing them.
Step 3. Propose the mime game
This is an excellent game for teaching children to interpret behavioral signals. To do this, you can write various types of emotions on a few pieces of paper, such as happiness, sadness, fear, and so on. Then put them in a container, fish them in turn and mimic what is written inside. This will teach you to recognize a certain emotion through a person's physical expressions.
You can also modify the game. Have the children draw pictures of people or animals experiencing certain emotions and guess which emotion it is
Step 4. Offer games that encourage eye contact
Eye contact is also an important social skill. In Western culture, looking in the eyes, listening and attention is shown. Then, try to teach children to make eye contact through play.
- The eye contact challenge can be a fun and playful way to introduce children to eye contact.
- Try playing "eyes on forehead". Stick an eye sticker on the forehead and invite the children to look at it. It won't be real eye contact, but it will give them a clearer idea of the direction they should be looking in when talking to someone.
- When you take them to play on the swing, encourage them to look you in the eye.
- Explain that eye contact does not have the same value in all cultures and that it is a sign of unkindness in some communities.
Part 3 of 4: Encouraging Children's Social Life
Step 1. Support the value of friendship
Friendships are important for a child's social development. To help them socialize, encourage them to make friends and nurture relationships.
- Invite your child's friends to play at home. Talk to other parents, suggesting that they spend a day together.
- Make him hang out with his friends. School events, birthday parties, and park afternoons are a great way to ensure your child meets up with his or her friends regularly.
- Help him manage conflicts in friendships. Explain that it is normal to argue or get angry with a friend. Invite him to apologize if it hurts another child's feelings.
Step 2. Have him play a team sport
According to research, team sports allow you to acquire important social skills, such as leadership and empathy. If your child loves physical activity, consider signing him up for a sports team.
- In addition to having a positive effect on their social skills, sport promotes physical activity and the learning of healthy habits. People who play team sports in childhood are less likely to smoke and even develop better self-esteem.
- However, be aware that not all children enjoy playing sports. If your child doesn't like it, don't force it. There are many extracurricular activities that promote work and team spirit. They can be just as useful as sports.
Step 3. Involve him in extracurricular activities
This is a great way to encourage them to develop social skills. Therefore, encourage him to attend an association or join the activities organized in the place where you live.
- Respect your child's interests. If they like to write or express themselves through other art forms, find a course or enroll in a special school.
- Consider the Boy Scouts. Many children acquire important interpersonal skills through Scouting.
Part 4 of 4: Seeking Outside Help
Step 1. Consult a therapist if necessary
If you have the impression that your child is having difficulty in relating, it may be that he has some mental health problem. If you are concerned about the development of his social skills, talk to a child neuropsychiatrist or therapist. Try asking your pediatrician who you can turn to.
Step 2. Recognize the social developmental delay in the child
If you notice that your child is having difficulty developing social skills, it is likely that he is different from others. A number of disorders, such as genetic disability or autism, can slow or hinder this development. Therefore, seek help from your pediatrician or child neuropsychiatrist if you seem to be experiencing this kind of difficulty:
- Between 19 and 24 months he cannot interact with others. He doesn't smile or react when he looks at you, he doesn't show interest in the game, and he doesn't recognize images of familiar objects. These symptoms may indicate that the child is autistic.
- If you have autism, your social development may be slow or erratic as you grow up. It is possible that he does not participate in small conversations, does not obey simple directions, does not listen when someone tells him a story, does not make friends, does not take the initiative to speak or does not express how he feels physically. This means that he can't even say "I'm hungry" or "I'm sick".
Step 3. Talk to your teachers
Try to regularly consult with your child's teachers. Learn about her social development, but also make sure she isn't being bullied or harassed. Bullying suffered by peers can delay the development of social skills. Therefore, a healthy relationship with teachers can help you keep an eye out for problems, such as bullying.
