When you reach a certain age, it may start to bother you that your parents don't feel comfortable leaving you home alone. Whether it's a security or trust issue, they usually have good reasons not to want you to be alone. However, if you feel ready for this responsibility, just show your parents that you are mature enough. To do this, you need to behave well and know how to react to problems and difficulties that can arise when they are not at home.
Steps
Part 1 of 3: Prove that you are Responsible
Step 1. You do well in school
One of the best ways to show your parents that you are responsible is to get the most out of school. This means studying for questions and exams, doing all homework, and delivering reports and projects on time. If they see that you take your duty seriously without their intervention, they may begin to realize that you are ready for more responsibilities, such as staying home alone.
- If you have problems with a certain subject at school, show that you are responsible by asking for help. Ask if you can meet the teacher after school, or take private lessons. You can also ask your parents or siblings for a helping hand if it comes to subjects they know.
- If you get a bad grade in a written test or question, tell your parents about it. Try to explain why you didn't do as well as you hoped. If you don't try to hide bad grades, they'll know they can trust you.
Step 2. Complete your duties
Taking care of the housework without being asked is another way to show your parents that you are responsible. They will certainly notice if you make your bed or take out the trash without them having to beg you to. If you have trouble remembering what to do, make a chart with all your duties and deadlines, then hang it somewhere in the room.
- If your parents ask you and your siblings to do something, like unload groceries from the car, you can earn points by volunteering.
- You can also make a great impression by taking care of jobs that have not been asked of you. For example, if you notice that your lawn is covered in leaves, rake them so your parents don't have to.
- When your parents are busy with housework or other activities, offer to look after your younger siblings or help them out, as a reminder of how responsible you are.
- If you have a pet, it's a good idea to help look after it. Take the dog for a walk when he needs to do his business, fill the cat's water bowl when it's empty, or clean the bird's cage if it's dirty.
Step 3. Follow the rules
Your parents will hold you accountable if they see that you abide by the rules they have imposed. Make sure you do this without complaining too much. For example, if they tell you that you are only allowed to surf the internet for a certain number of hours a day, don't try to do it secretly and don't complain that your friends can stay online as long as they want. Respect the rules, so that your parents understand that you respect them too.
If you have to break the rule on occasion, talk to your parents about it. For example, if you have to go to bed earlier than a certain time, but the movie or sporting event you want to watch ends later, ask if you can make an exception for that night
Step 4. Spend quality time with your parents
They may not want to leave you alone because they want to have fun with you. Maybe they're going to the movies and they wish you were there too. They might feel hurt if you say you'd rather stay home alone. Making time for your parents can increase the likelihood of them leaving you at home in the future.
When your parents ask you to accompany them to an event or activity that you find interesting, answer yes right away! Maybe in the future they will leave you at home when they have to do more boring things
Part 2 of 3: Give your opinion
Step 1. Talk to your parents at the right time
When you want to make a request, timing is of the essence. If you do this when they're in a bad mood or stressed, they're more likely to say no. That's why you should pick a time when they're relaxed and happy, when they're more likely to say yes.
- Find out when your parents are in a good mood, like after eating their favorite meal or just waking up after sleeping longer than usual. These are the ideal occasions to ask to be left at home alone.
- Also pay attention to times when your parents are irritable. For example, they may be in a bad mood after a long day at work or when their favorite team has just lost an important match. Avoid asking to be home alone on such occasions.
Step 2. Stay rational and calm
If you let your emotions dominate when you talk to your parents, they probably won't take you too seriously. This means that you don't have to scream, moan or cry when you ask to be home alone. Also avoid saying that all of your friends can do this. Often this motivation will not change your parents' opinion.
If you feel frustrated and think you are losing composure while talking to your parents, try counting to 10 in your head. This can help you regain control and not do something you may regret
Step 3. Explain why you think you are ready
To convince your parents that you are responsible enough to stay home alone, it is important to explain why you think you are ready. Point out all the ways you have shown that you are responsible, such as the good grades you got in school and the fact that you washed the dishes after dinner without anyone asking. You should also reassure them by saying that you know what to do in an emergency, so make sure you know how to find any contact numbers you may need.
- When explaining your reasons to your parents, use simplicity. You can say, "I think I'm ready to stay home alone because I'm responsible enough to only get good grades in school and because I remember taking the dog out every afternoon. I also know I have to call 113 if there is a emergency and ask Mrs. Rossi next door for help if I have a minor problem. You can trust me."
- Your parents may be concerned that you are afraid of being home alone. Reassure them that this is not the case. For example, you can say, "I feel completely comfortable being home alone", or "I don't mind being alone at all."
- Make sure you know how to operate the home security system and know where useful tools are located in an emergency, such as a fire extinguisher.
Step 4. Point out to your parents that this is an opportunity for personal growth
They may be more likely to leave you at home alone if you say it will help you become more mature and responsible. Explain that it will allow you to become more independent so that you are able to take better care of yourself and help more around the house.
You can say, "It will help me become more mature because I will understand how important it is to be careful around the house, for example by locking the door and respecting other security measures."
Step 5. Express gratitude
When you ask your parents for permission to stay home alone, it's a good idea to show that you are grateful to them. That way, they won't think you expect to always win when they ask you for something. Name every time they have shown confidence in you or have allowed you to do something you asked for, so that they understand that you appreciate their actions.
Try to be as specific as possible when showing gratitude. For example, you can say: "I really appreciate that you made me stay up late to watch the league game last week", or "It meant a lot to me that you trusted me enough to let me sleep at Marco's house. even if the next day there was school"
Step 6. Use more subtle persuasion strategies
In some cases, you may need to explain what the direct benefits to your parents are of leaving you home alone. For example, you might point out that they can save money on babysitting, or suggest that they can go out alone or with friends more often.
Don't overdo it when trying to convince them this way. If you appear to be doing them a favor, they will probably be skeptical
Step 7. Suggest a test
If you feel like your parents are undecided, it might be a good idea to give it a try before making a final decision. Ask if they are willing to leave you in the house for a short time instead of a whole day or night, so you can see how you behave when you are alone and be more comfortable.
- Ask for a short test. You can suggest to your parents that the next time they go to buy milk, they leave you at home. Even if you are alone for no more than 15-20 minutes, it may be enough to convince them that you are ready for this responsibility.
- In some cases, your parents may want more rehearsal before they feel comfortable leaving you home alone for an entire evening. You have to accept all the evidence necessary to convince them that you are responsible enough to be alone for longer periods.
Step 8. Give your parents time to think
If you put them with their backs to the wall and demand an answer as soon as the request is made, they are much more likely to say no. Instead, you should say that you would like them to think about the situation for a while before deciding. As they reflect, be patient and don't keep bothering them.
To maintain patience, it is a good idea to decide on a specific time when you will discuss the topic again. For example, you might say, "Why don't you think about it for a while? We'll talk about it again on Friday afternoon."
Part 3 of 3: Receive the Response
Step 1. Accept compromises
When your parents are deciding whether to leave you at home alone, you need to be willing to go out and meet them. They may only feel comfortable in certain situations and you should respect their feelings and agree with them. Even if you will only be allowed to stay home once in a while, it is still a chance to prove that they can be trusted to leave you alone all the time.
- Your parents may have some conditions on when you can be home alone, such as when they are not out for more than a couple of hours or when trusted neighbors are home while they are not around. The conditions may seem annoying to you, but remember that you will still have a chance to gain the trust of your parents.
- Your parents may also set rules for when I'm not at home. For example, they may forbid you from inviting friends or using the stove. Make sure you talk to them about all the rules so you understand what they expect from you.
Step 2. Accept the decision calmly
If your parents decide that you are not ready to be home alone, you should react maturely to their choice. Screaming or complaining would only convince them that they were right. On the contrary, accept the decision in a calm and composed way, so that they understand how mature you are.
- Remember, this is an important decision from a parent's point of view and you may not be able to influence the outcome. You can take all 10 to school, follow the house rules to the letter and they may not be safe anyway, because they care about your safety.
- You have the right to tell your parents that their decision angers you, but do it with respect. For example, you can say, "I am very disappointed, but I understand your decision."
- You can also ask if you will be able to reopen the dialogue in the future. That way, your parents will know that you really care about being home alone and that you hope to get this responsibility in the future.
Step 3. Wait before asking again
If your parents don't leave you home alone after you talk, you'll probably want to ask again at the next available opportunity. However, it's a bad idea to push too hard after they've said no. Instead, give them some time to think. Try to wait at least a month or two before bringing this up again, so they've had even more time to see how mature and responsible you are.
When you wait to ask your parents to stay home alone, behave flawlessly. Get good grades in school, do all the housework you are entitled to, and follow your parents' rules. If they see you taking a responsible attitude, they will be more likely to say yes next time
Advice
- Before asking your parents if you can stay home alone, make sure you are ready. If you have fears or worries, it may not be the right time to take on this responsibility.
- Schedule times to call your parents when they are not at home. For example, they might be heard every hour, so you know everything is fine. This can reassure you and them a lot.
- Make sure you understand all the security measures in your home. In addition to knowing the emergency contact numbers, you should know what to do in the event of a blackout, storm or fire.
- You should know basic first aid practices, in case you get hurt when you are home alone.
