Starting online friendships and relationships with people has now become the norm. Whether it's looking for a girlfriend, finding someone with the same interests as you, or connecting with an acquaintance, the internet has made it much easier to meet people online. Tackling this relatively new terrain is complicated by the many dangers and diverse social rules. It is therefore very important to proceed with caution.
Steps
Part 1 of 4: Choosing the Venue for the Online Meeting
Step 1. Determine exactly what kind of people you are looking for so you can choose the right websites and apps
Since there are various sites and applications depending on the type of meetings you want to have, it is important to know what you are looking for right from the start. For example, while both Meetic and Tinder are perfect for finding a possible partner, Meetic is usually frequented by people interested in a serious and monogamous relationship; instead Tinder is aimed above all at those looking for adventures and occasional encounters.
Step 2. Decide how much information about yourself you want to share
The amount of information requested and the possibility of making it public differ greatly from one site to another. Online forums that bring together people with the same interests, such as Watches & Passions or PlayStation Forum, are open to everyone but generally ask for little information in order to register. To create a social profile, for example on Facebook, a lot of personal information is requested but then you can protect your privacy by restricting the people who can see them.
Step 3. Determine the level of intimacy you want to achieve with the people you will meet online
Here too the various sites differ greatly from each other: participants expect to find different levels of intimacy. Online dating sites are designed so that users eventually meet in person. On the contrary, forums on specific topics encourage interaction between very different people so that they share their interests, but without it touching the personal sphere or without arriving at the meeting in real life.
Keep in mind that sites and applications that do not filter or do not allow you to choose the city or country you are in make meeting off the web much more difficult. This means that the friend with whom you share the passion for wine who is in another continent will hardly be able to take a plane to have a glass with you
Part 2 of 4: Creating a Profile
Step 1. Be careful starting on the right foot
What people see of you on the internet will determine how they think of you - there are no second chances online. If you are posting a featured photo on a dating site, choose an image that enhances you, taken with a quality camera. If you are writing a description of yourself for a forum, highlight your most particular and unique interests. Write clear and grammatically correct sentences. Be brief and get straight to the point: it often takes people very little to get an idea of others.
What is the "right foot" depends on the website you have chosen. Before creating your real profile, it can be helpful to create a blank profile to explore the site and see what kind of people people expect
Step 2. Be honest
It is very important to maintain the level of privacy that you feel is right, but it is equally important to be honest, whatever type of information you share online. If you intend to meet in person who you will meet on the web, you need to be sure that they are interested in meeting the real you. Furthermore, honesty is essential for building a relationship on the web, often considered a dangerous and unsafe environment.
Step 3. Complete the entire profile
Providing all the information for your online profile is useful for others to interact with and respond to you. It will make you seem genuinely interested in the site or application and other users will think you are someone worth chatting with.
Part 3 of 4: Texting with Other People
Step 1. Get familiar with the social rules of the site or app
Each of these has its own label, with rules often implicit. Search the web for information about it. For example, on Facebook it is considered polite to send a greeting message to an acquaintance before sending them a friend request. If a site or app has a list of social rules, it is good to follow them. Many forums, including the new and very popular Reddit, list rules for interacting with other users; violating these rules can mean exclusion from conversations and, at worst, being banned from the site.
Remember that forums often have several messaging sections, each with their own rules. Do not assume that the rules of one also apply to another. For example, the "askphilosophy" section of Reddit allows you to ask open questions, while the "philosophy" section allows you to ask questions followed, however, by an argument or an opinion
Step 2. Interact with the online community
Meeting people on the internet can be intimidating, but at some point the best thing is to jump in and start interacting! Remember that the relative anonymity provided by the internet allows you to walk away from an unpleasant situation at any time, which is very useful to remember when dealing with a contact that does not convince you. On the other hand, this same anonymity allows some people to behave in a much more rude way than they normally would: it is therefore important to detach yourself from these individuals and remember that their opinions have nothing to do with the real you.
Step 3. Protect yourself and always act with caution
The anonymity of the internet also means that you never know for sure who you are dealing with. Never give out more personal information than you would like. Never agree to go somewhere or do something wrong with you. Trust your instincts.
If you feel threatened, contact the site or app moderators or find the link to report abuse. If you need more help, you can contact an association against cyberbullying, where you will find people who are able to understand the situation
Part 4 of 4: Meet in person
Step 1. Ask the other person politely if he wants to meet you live
You may not want to meet friends you have met online, but it's important to ask respectfully and politely if you like. Don't ask others for information that you don't want to give about yourself. Propose a public and outdoor place to find yourself (for your safety and theirs).
- Choose a place that will allow you both to have a long conversation and to go away whenever you want. For example, going to the cinema might be a bad choice because you can't chat during the movie. Even going out for dinner is not ideal for a first meeting, as it would be strange to leave and leave the meal halfway through if you are not comfortable.
- If the site or app is not normally aimed at meeting in person, as in the case of forums dedicated to sharing common interests, pay particular attention. If done too casually, the request to meet will seem intimidating and suspicious.
Step 2. Arrive early for your appointment and be presentable
Meeting someone you know online isn't much different than meeting anyone else. You won't impress him if you don't try to. Act as if it were a friend you haven't seen in years: show warmth, interest and respect for their spaces. Remember that you are still two strangers and that you know very little about each other. It will take time to achieve "offline" intimacy, which is completely different from online!
Advice
- Never take everything someone says online as true.
- Use humor to break the ice when meeting new people.
