If your parents still treat you like a child and haven't noticed how much you've matured lately, you can do a little more to prove that you are truly responsible. Whether you want to persuade them to get a privilege or just want to be treated like an adult, you need to commit to being responsible and accepting the consequences of your actions.
Steps
Part 1 of 2: Starting with the Basics
Step 1. Appropriate your education
Taking school seriously and applying yourself will help show your parents that you can manage your time and set goals.
- Keep good grades and ask your teacher for a helping hand or private lessons if you need help.
- Prove that you are not lazy by choosing the most difficult courses.
- Develop good study habits and do all your homework without the need for reminders from your parents. Use a journal to keep track of classwork and question days, so you never have to find yourself doing all the work at the last minute.
Step 2. Take more initiatives around the house
Helping your parents around the house makes their lives easier and leads them to see you as an adult.
- If your parents usually wake you up in the morning, you can show them that you are becoming more responsible by starting to use an alarm clock.
- Try ordering your room without being asked. If you have to do some housework regularly, do it without receiving the order. You can set reminders on your mobile or hang a calendar in your room, so you never forget when you have to do your duties.
- If you get dirty, always clean.
Step 3. Find a job
If you start working, you will show your parents that you are responsible enough to stick to schedules, follow orders and manage money. If you're in your late teens, look for a part-time job as a waiter or clerk. If you are younger, you can help neighbors with housework, such as raking garden leaves, mowing the lawn or shoveling snow.
- Show your parents that you are responsible for managing your money by saving some of what you earn.
- Offer to use part of your income to help with household expenses, such as your phone bill or car insurance. This can be especially helpful if you are trying to show your parents that you are responsible enough to have a phone or start driving.
Step 4. Learn some skills useful in everyday life
Show your parents that you don't need them to take care of you like they used to by learning how to shop, cook dinner, or do laundry.
- If you don't know how to do something, ask your parents if they can teach you. They can show you how to use common appliances like a washing machine or lawn mower, or train you in more specific activities, like whitewashing a room or unclogging the sink.
- If you want to start driving, ask your parents to teach you the skills you will need on the road, such as changing a flat tire, changing the oil or topping up the radiator fluid.
- Help out your parents when they are dealing with these things, especially if they are very busy.
Step 5. Keep your word
If you want your parents to trust you, you need to make sure you always keep your promises. If you say you'll clean your room by Friday, do it for real! Be careful not to promise things you can't keep.
- If you use a school diary, make it a habit to write down your other duties as well, so you can manage your time better.
- Being on time is also very important. If you keep your word but are always late or fail to meet deadlines, you will not seem very responsible.
Step 6. Don't get in trouble
Nobody expects you to be perfect, but do your best to make the right decisions and avoid socializing with people who can get you on the wrong track.
- If you make a mistake, admit it and tell your parents that you learned from that experience.
- Instead of hiding things, you need to be open and honest with them about the difficulties you encounter as a child or teenager. Tell about all the times you did the right thing, even if it was a difficult decision.
- If you need advice on dealing with issues like bullying, drugs, and alcohol, remember that it's a good idea to talk to your parents. If you don't feel comfortable discussing these things with them, find another adult you trust, such as a teacher, football manager, or other relative.
Part 2 of 2: Convince Your Parents That You Deserve New Privileges
Step 1. Do your research
If your goal is to convince your parents that you are responsible, so that they allow you to do something, like dating a girl, or buy you something, like a cell phone or a pet, read some materials on the subject. so that you can prepare a good speech.
- If the item you want has a price, make sure you know it exactly and know what the best deals are.
- If you want a pet, write a detailed list of all the activities that will be done and suggest who can take care of what and when.
- Try to anticipate some of your parents' objections and prepare responses accordingly. For example, if you believe your parents will be worried that you are in danger if you go to the mall with friends, inquire about the centre's security service.
Step 2. Start the discussion
Tell your parents exactly what you want and why you think you deserve it. Come prepared with all your research and try to provide examples of how you have been responsible in similar situations in the past.
- Make sure your parents have time to talk when you start the talk. Try saying, "I'd like to talk to you about something important. Now is a good time?"
- Once you have their full attention, explain to your parents exactly what you are asking for and what you are willing to do to get it. Try saying, "I think I'm old and responsible enough to go out with my friends alone. I promise I'll be very careful and will always come home before curfew."
- If you've had the same discussion with your parents in the past, try starting by repeating the objections they raised in the past and explaining what has changed. For example, you can say, "I know you didn't want to buy me a phone last month, but I worked hard to save some money to contribute to the cost and I'm willing to accept any rules you want to impose on me."
- Find out what your parents' concerns are and try to negotiate by creating a set of rules that you will abide by. For example, if you are asking your parents for a phone, you may have to accept that they read your messages. If you are asking to be allowed to drive, you may need to accept a curfew.
- Be willing to offer something in return. You could contribute your money to the purchase of an item you want, or offer to do more housework in exchange for a new privilege.
Step 3. Take baby steps
If your parents don't want to give you the freedom you want, try asking for something else. For example, if they don't plan on leaving you alone without babysitting for an entire weekend, ask if you can stay home alone for an afternoon.
Try to abide by your parents' rules and keep all your promises if they give you a privilege that is slightly less important than you want. It can take time to gain their trust, but if you can show that you always behave responsibly when you receive a concession, you will be more likely to get what you really want in the future
Step 4. Be patient
Keep taking on more responsibilities at home and at school to show your parents that yours is not just a stunt to get what you want.
- Try reopening the conversation from time to time, but don't bother your parents, or they'll stop considering the matter.
- If you finally get what you want, you need to continue to be as responsible as you were before, if not more. If you betray your parents' trust, you will likely lose the privilege you just gained and in the future it will be much more difficult to convince them that you are responsible.
Advice
- To be convincing you really have to be responsible. You can't just play a part for a few days and expect your parents to believe you.
- All parents are different. If your parents are particularly protective, you will need to try harder. Try talking to them with an open heart and make sure you focus on why you deserve some privileges, instead of telling them how your friends can do those things already.
- If your parents tell you no, accept the answer in a mature way. You can calmly say "I understand" and let it go. Keep trying to become more responsible.
