It's not always easy to make someone love you, but there are some strategies you can use to improve your odds. For example, try to make yourself more attractive, try to get to know the person you are interested in better, and try to build a relationship with them. If all goes well, you may find a few more tips to help keep love alive.
Steps
Part 1 of 4: Make yourself more attractive
Step 1. Take care of your physical appearance
If you take care and consideration of your outward appearance, you will be able to attract the attention of the person you like. So, never neglect personal hygiene and cleanliness in order to keep fit and be attractive. Here are some ways to look your best:
- Exercise regularly;
- Dress well, choosing clothes that are suitable for your body and that enhance your physicality;
- Shower every day and use deodorant;
- Keep your hair clean and tidy;
- Brush your teeth and, if necessary, use mints or gum to freshen your breath;
- Shaving or grooming the beard (for men).
Step 2. Be yourself
If you want to get someone, you don't have to make them fall in love with a false image you have built for yourself. He must love you for who you are. Keep in mind that you can't be nice to everyone, but at least try to be authentic and spontaneous. Perhaps you will have to reflect on yourself and analyze yourself to really understand who you are. To find out, take advantage of the work of some researchers, who have identified four fundamental elements of personal identity:
- Self-awareness, which corresponds to knowing and trusting one's emotions, stimuli, abilities and tastes;
- Clear assessment of one's strengths and weaknesses;
- Open behavior, in order to show one's nature and beliefs in a sincere and spontaneous way;
- Important relationships, which are necessary because they allow others to know who you really are, both for good and for bad.
Step 3. Learn to converse
It may happen that the person we are interested in does not even know that we exist because we are too shy to speak to them. So, try to overcome any hesitation in the approach and take the initiative. For example, you could make her laugh by telling jokes or funny anecdotes - it's always a good start. However, if the idea of using humor frightens you, try interacting with her by chatting about anything that can connect you, like the classes you attend, the traffic, the weather.
- "Today it rains so hard that I was afraid I would float down the street! I even saw a car submerged in water on my way."
- "Did you know that the bar will start selling fresh croissants? I can't wait to try them. I'll probably order three: I'll eat one right away and take the others home. But if they're too good, I risk eating them all and regretting it later. Also. are you so tempting? ".
- "My brother dressed up as Darth Vader and is already in line for Star Wars seven days ago. I mean, I love Star Wars, but I can't imagine camping out on the street to see a movie!"
Step 4. Communicate openly with your body and facial expressions
If you use this communicative language, the harmony between you and the other person will certainly improve. Generally, we are most attracted to those who have spontaneous and inviting ways, so try to show these qualities when interacting with the person you are interested in. For example, you might:
- Sit facing her;
- Smile at them;
- Lean slightly in their direction as you chat
- Look her in the eye.
Step 5. Show your kindness
We are also attracted to people who are nice to others, so try to show all your friendliness when you are in the company of the person you like. Here are some simple ways:
- Always have a nice word to everyone (do not gossip and do not speak ill of others);
- Show that you are genuinely concerned if those you care about are sad or in pain;
- Offer your help as much to the person you like as to others, whenever you can;
- Encourage the person you like as much as others by valuing all their successes.
Step 6. Show that you have confidence in yourself
Even if you don't feel that cocky, try to show some ease. If you are shy, test yourself by feigning confidence among others. Cultivate your interests, reflect on the most important goals you would like to accomplish in life, and try to achieve them. People are attracted to those who manage to enrich and broaden their horizons and personal interests.
- Learn something new: a language, a sport, a profession. It could give you a feeling of unthinkable well-being and confidence, as well as being a great conversation starter.
- Get involved. If you are shy, play a sport, play theater or join a musical group to control nervousness and become more confident when dealing with strangers.
Part 2 of 4: Deepening the Knowledge with the Person You Like
Step 1. Ask her a few questions
Sometimes, we would like those we like to reciprocate our feelings, but when we actually begin to meet her, it happens to find that it does not correspond to the idea we had of her. Before investing all your energy into winning over someone, make sure you like them, both outwardly and in the way they behave and treat others. If you have the opportunity to sit next to her in class or at the restaurant, ask her what her interests and goals are. You can ask her:
- What did he do during the holidays;
- What she likes to do for fun;
- Which places do you want to visit the most;
- What kind of music do you like;
- What is she particularly greedy for.
Step 2. Try to make friends with his friends
You may understand many things by dating the people closest to your flame. Pay attention to how he relates to them. Ask yourself if you'd like to be treated the same way. If not, take it off your head.
Step 3. Attend it
You should take the time to get to know the person you've fallen in love with from various points of view. Try to observe her when you are in a group before going out alone together. This way, you will be able to get to know her gradually and see how she behaves in different situations. After a while, you will begin to understand his true character and realize if you still like him as a person.
Step 4. Look for his company
It is also important to be alone because you can see how it behaves. Even if he only sees you as a friend, it can be the beginning of a closer relationship, but it doesn't mean that a love story can't be born. Here's what you might do the first few times together:
- Organize excursions;
- Try your hand at rock climbing;
- Go to the restaurant;
- Volunteer at an animal shelter
- Visit a museum;
- Playing bowling;
- Have a coffee.
Part 3 of 4: Be Romantic
Step 1. Don't be sparing with compliments
Tell the person you like everything you appreciate about them. Sure, you can focus on the physical characteristics, but it is best for you to focus mainly on the sides that are not necessarily part of the outward appearance.
- "You're so good with animals. They seem to really love you!"
- "I'm so impressed that you're writing a book. I don't think I could ever do it. How did you get started?"
- "You really are the best skier I've ever seen. Why don't you try to get into the pro category?".
Step 2. Try flirting
It's not for everyone, but this way you can take the relationship to a more advanced level. Jokes and little jokes are part of the game, but also eye contact and smiles. Also try gently touching the person you like, perhaps on the arm or hand as you speak, to show your interest.
Before you try to flirt, look out for signs of interest in her. If he smiles at you, looks you in the eye, and occasionally touches you, the flirting game is very likely to work. However, if she tends to avoid eye contact, is cold, rude, and keeps her distance, then forget it
Step 3. Ask for an appointment
At this point, he may really see you as a possible partner. Sure, it's not easy to expose yourself by asking someone out, but if you're trying to win the person you're interested in, you'll have to take the initiative. Take this step once you get to know her a little better so that you have a clearer idea of what she likes to do. Here are some suggestions:
- Take a dance class together. You'll have a great excuse to be closer to her.
- Organize a picnic. A delicious cheese, fresh bread and a good bottle of wine will allow you to spend a nice afternoon.
- Go to a jazz club. Even if you don't like this kind of music, the atmosphere and the possibility of being at close range to talk to her will play in your favor.
Part 4 of 4: Keeping the Relationship Alive
Step 1. Listen
Having good listening skills is essential to keep a relationship going. So, try to listen and always pay attention to your partner when he talks. Here are some ways:
- Watch him while he talks to you;
- Nod and step in to show your attention;
- Repeat what he said from time to time to show that you are following his speech;
- Ask questions to clear up any doubts.
Step 2. Say what you think
Sincerity is also an important element in a healthy relationship. If you need help or are upset about something, don't hesitate to tell your partner. On the other hand, he too should feel capable of doing the same.
For example, if you feel disheartened because you always fix the bed in the morning, ask him to help you or take turns
Step 3. Plan something fun
The relationship is more stimulating if you organize fun outings and activities with your partner. Try to go out at least once a month and share other little things to make life more interesting.
For example, you could take a painting class, learn a language, or play a new sport
Step 4. Take some time for yourself
In healthy relationships, it is also important to take a few moments away from your partner to be with friends or pursue your interests. Set aside one evening a week and spend it however you like.
For example, you could go out with friends, go to a coffee shop for a few hours to read a book, see a movie that doesn't interest your partner, or stay at home and engage in artistic or manual work
Step 5. Always try to surprise your significant other
Small, loving gestures that can make her happy and surprise her from time to time will help keep your relationship healthy. For example, you could bring her coffee while she works, surprise her with a flower, give her a little thought, or simply have a heartfelt gesture to brighten her day.
