Religious faith is a very personal subject that has its roots in the way an individual was brought up and in his emotions. Beliefs help make sense of the world and provide guidelines for relating to others. Everyone has the right to believe in what they want and disrespecting those who do not share the same opinions does not give credit to you or them. In some cases, however, you may think that a certain belief is dangerous. Starting a regular theological discussion can help your friend change your mind and even change your way of thinking. Just remember that it is a long process.
Steps
Part 1 of 2: Research the belief system
Step 1. Get informed
Read everything you can about atheism, Christianity and the history of religions. You must read up on both opposing positions, both on the beliefs of atheists and on those of Christians, as well as on other belief systems and religions. Morals and values are shared by several beliefs, thus becoming an indispensable common ground for discussion.
There are many online research sources that can help you learn about various religions, including podcasts and audio and video lessons
Step 2. Read and understand the sacred text, from the first to the last page
Argument and persuasive arguments cannot be built on nothing. You need to understand the origins of your friend's beliefs to build a dialogue between the two belief systems.
The Bible is considered one of the most influential literary sources of Western culture and is worth reading, if only for its narrative merits
Step 3. Find out about common topics raised by members
While it is not possible to prepare to counter every conjecture, you should learn the most common and used by defenders of Christianity.
- Among these is the one of the finely regulated universe, according to which the world supports life in such a precise way that it is impossible that it has not been studied and generated by a higher being. This argument contrasts directly with scientific knowledge about the origins of the universe.
- Another argument in favor of faith is Pascal's wager that everyone should live in the belief that God exists because the stakes are staggered. If God does not exist, our life simply ends; however, if God exists, our behavior during mortality determines how we will be rewarded eternally in heaven or punished in the infirm. This argument, while steeped in logic, raises questions about honesty, morality, and the magnitude of God's powers.
Step 4. Consider your own superstitions, urban legends and myths
Learn why people believe stories that are backed up only by anecdotal evidence. Learning that belief and faith are something that belongs to the field of psychology, allows you to better prepare yourself to counter and understand the reasons why you behave the way you do about your beliefs.
- Urban legends like that of Bloody Mary, for example, are not backed up by any scientific evidence or foundation and are known to be false. However, they spread because the idea that such an event could exist is fun and seductive.
- These stories or tales often arise from real episodes or deal with people who really existed, but the crumb of truth contained in them has been distorted or exaggerated over time. The Bloody Mary legend, for example, could refer to Mary Worth, a woman hanged for witchcraft, or to Mary I of England, who was known for her ruthlessness.
Step 5. Study the basics of physics and biology
Some believers' arguments are based on misinterpretation or misinformation regarding the basic concepts of physics and biology. By understanding the core of these arguments, you can dismantle unscientific reasoning and assumptions.
Evolution is the best known topic of debate between Christians and atheists. Natural selection, how creatures survive and die are great starting points for your studies
Part 2 of 2: Start a Conversation
Step 1. Let the other person bring up the topic
Wait for the other party to initiate the discussion. This way, you can dodge any accusations of attacking his belief system for ulterior motives. Stay calm, steadfast and reasonable; a common stereotype surrounding atheists is that they are angry and hostile.
- Explain why you are an atheist and what this means to you. The goal of the conversation is to dispel all preconceived beliefs that you both have of each other's beliefs.
- For example, you might say, "I believe that people have the ability to distinguish and choose what is right from what is wrong because of the experience they accumulate in life."
- You could also argue: "The human being is very complex and interesting - I am convinced that he can make mistakes, but at the same time he can learn from them without being supervised."
Step 2. Ask questions about the other party's beliefs
Why do you believe in a certain thing? Sometimes, it is enough to demonstrate a false belief from time to time. Ask them to explain something about their religion that you cannot understand, to grasp its deeper meaning.
- You can ask your friend, "How can God allow some people on Earth to starve while others eat too much?"
- Another question might be, "I'm interested in a Christian's opinion that the Bible was written by multiple people. Is it difficult to trust so many different accounts?"
- Suggest that the interlocutor ask himself questions about daily happenings. This practice can help you find the truth and can become a habit to change your mind.
Step 3. Keep an informal approach
Prove that atheism hasn't negatively affected your life. If the other person states that there is the hand of God in every event in their life, you can counter with other factors that have played an important role, such as their actions or professional skills.
For example, accessing a very exclusive university faculty might lead the person to believe that they have received a divine gift, but it was the hard work that this individual did that paved the way for that result. For this reason, you can tell him: "Congratulations! All the effort you put into the studio has paid off!"
Step 4. Avoid logic errors
Both sides of a debate often develop the wrong arguments, relying only on rhetoric without even realizing it.
The most common informal errors are circular reasoning that begin and result in the same idea. For example: "The Bible does not contain false claims; everything in the Bible is true, therefore the Bible contains only the truth." The second and third parts of the statement repeat the same concept and not a value argument
Step 5. Socialize with the interlocutor
Spend a day with a diverse group of friends who have various different life experiences. Getting in touch with the views and philosophies of others allows you to expand your thinking.
- Avoid proposing activities that may make friends of particular religions uncomfortable, such as wild parties or watching violent movies.
- Board games, shopping or hiking are perfect activities that everyone enjoys.
Step 6. Give friends practical advice for their problems
Refer to your personal experiences to show that they are genuine suggestions. If they cite some pearls of wisdom from the Bible, respond with equally wise quotes from other belief systems or a historical figure.
- For example, if a friend can't keep up in school, you can say, "I understand you, I too have had a hard time with all my homework. Have you tried joining any study groups? classmates and in the end we got the job done in half the time! ".
- When your friend is experiencing a period of low self-confidence, you can offer your help like this: "When I feel depressed, I always think of a great Buddhist phrase: You can explore the universe in search of someone who deserves yours. love and your affection more than you deserve and in the end you will realize that it does not exist."
Step 7. Know when to back off
Do not let differences of opinion and discussion cause the end of your friendship; learn when it's time to drop the conversation.
- Don't raise your voice. A high tone of voice often indicates anger or can lead to anger, which in turn can lead the discussion off topic. If the interlocutor starts yelling, tone down the discussion.
- Avoid physical contact. A debate that becomes a physical aggression is no longer an exchange of ideas. If you or the other person starts tugging at each other, end the conversation and keep your distance for some time.
- Talking about the emotions from which thoughts originate helps create a more peaceful and constructive atmosphere. Show the interlocutor that you are motivated by thoughtfulness, good intentions, and that your goal is not to be right in an argument.
- Stay on topic. If the discussion begins to touch on other topics, turning into a personal attack or a series of insults, it means that it is time to stop it.
- If your friend gets angry or hurt, step back and apologize. Even if you feel like you're right, hurting someone else's feelings isn't the purpose of an argument and you don't want to put your friendship at risk.
Step 8. Keep an open mind
Listen and understand the point of view of the interlocutor; if faith helps him feel satisfied and at peace, accept this fact. Do not harm or destroy another individual's sense of peace.
Advice
- Respect must be mutual; if you want to receive it, you must show it to the faithful.
- Do not overdo it. Changing one's faith is an extremely personal process, which by its very nature takes a long time. It is also a gradual evolution and you have to let the individual come to their own conclusions. A journey of personal discovery leads to stronger results.
- If you are open to your friend's opinions, you will be repaid in the same coin.
- Listen carefully to the believers' concerns and doubts. Try to understand the reasons that lead him to believe and then address them one at a time directly.
- It may be inappropriate and even hurt your arguments to cite peer-reviewed scientific publications at every possible opportunity.
- Each person is different, even within the same religion. Don't assume your friend thinks or believes anything just because he's a Christian, but ask for his or her opinion on it.
- Demonstrate the normality of an atheist's life through your friendships and the goals you have achieved. If the interlocutor understands that being an atheist does not mean having a less fulfilling existence, he may abandon some prejudices.
- Draw attention to some positive and altruistic organizations founded and run by atheists, such as Emergency.
- Don't bully him into becoming an atheist.
- Only discuss religion and faith when invited to do so. Avoid this topic in dinner conversations; the last thing you want is to look like a "moralizer", become boring or monopolize attention.
