Sooner or later all breastfeeding moms will come to a point where they need to stop doing it. This is generally a gradual process that should allow the baby and mother to progressively get used to the changes that will occur during weaning. Sometimes, however, it is necessary to suddenly stop breastfeeding due to some variation in lifestyle, a pathology or because the mother no longer has the same availability as before: in such circumstances there is no time to simplify the transition. However, mothers who find themselves in this position should not be discouraged. Of course, it is more difficult to abruptly wean your baby, but there are ways to get through this phase smoothly.
Steps
Part 1 of 3: Encourage the Passage to the Child
Step 1. Decide which foods are best for your baby
Before weaning, you need to make sure that your baby will have an adequate diet in the absence of breast milk. This aspect varies according to his age.
- If she is under a year old, she will need to switch to formula milk to get most of the calories. Babies under the age of 12 months need 50 calories per day for every 50 g of body weight, and since they cannot digest cow's milk, they will need to receive this nutrition from the specially formulated formula for their consumption, available in any pharmacy or supermarket. Although babies over 6 months of age may begin to taste solid foods, such as baby puree, remember that "for them, consuming food before one year is mostly fun." Generally before 12 months, solid foods do not provide many calories and are not enough to meet their nutritional needs.
- After 12 months, it is possible to proceed directly to the administration of whole cow's milk and solid foods, as long as the child is able to chew and has a varied diet. Between one and two years of age he will need about 1000 calories per day, distributed over 3 small meals and 2 snacks. About half of these calories should come from fat (mostly through cow's milk, cheese, yogurt, butter, and so on) and the other half from protein (meat, eggs, tofu), fruits, vegetables, and whole grains.
Step 2. Stock up on weaning foods
Babies should be fed every few hours, so that they have something available immediately to replace their mother's milk.
- If you are forced to stop breastfeeding immediately, however, having several alternatives available, you will be able to facilitate the transition phase for the baby.
- If your child is one year old and has never taken formula milk, consider purchasing different types (but also getting several baby food if they are over 6 months old). Ask your pediatrician for some advice on this, but remember that you will likely have to go through trial and error for your child to accept this substitute food if they have never tried it before. Each type tastes slightly different, and some may be more gentle on the stomach or have a more or less pleasant taste than others, so your baby can tolerate one instead of another.
- If the baby is a year or so, buy whole cow's milk. If you have reason to think he may be suffering from any sensitivity or allergy to cow's milk, you will need to find a milk replacer that provides enough fat, protein and calcium to meet the nutritional needs that underpin neonatal development. Consult your pediatrician and ask if you can try goat or soy milk enriched with fat and calcium. You can find them at most pharmacies and, currently, even at the counters of some well-stocked supermarkets.
Step 3. Ask for a helping hand
A baby may oppose weaning and be reluctant to accept the bottle or drip cup from the mother, because it associates the mother figure with breastfeeding. Therefore, during the transition period, it would be helpful to ask other adults you trust to bottle or feed the baby.
- Ask your child's father or another trusted person your child is familiar with to give them the bottle or drip cup. Many babies refuse to bottle from their mother but accept it from someone else because they don't associate it with breastfeeding.
- If the baby is used to eating during the night, ask the father or another adult to take care of night feedings for a few nights.
- It can be helpful to ask a friend, parent, or grandparent to be around you during this time. Maybe your baby is disappointed because, despite your presence, you don't bring him close to the breast, so in some moments it would not be a bad idea to get away from him or even run some errands in order to give him a respite.
Step 4. Make sure your baby gets the milk he needs
Young children or those who have not yet learned to drink from a bottle or drip cup are at risk of being malnourished, especially during the transition period.
- Look at the level on the side of the bottle or drip cup to make sure you are getting the right amount of milk with each meal.
- If they can't suckle or don't understand how to latch onto the teat, you will need to try using a dropper or cup with a spout (cup-feeding). It is not very easy to use this latter tool when children are very young, but it is possible with a little patience.
Step 5. Use your child's age-appropriate language to explain this step to him
Babies do not realize what weaning is, but generally as they grow they understand words even before they can speak and are able to understand a simple explanation for weaning.
- When the baby points or looks for the breast, tell him, "Mom has no milk. Let's go get some," and immediately bring him the bottle or drip cup.
- Be consistent with your explanations. If you say you don't have milk, don't give in by offering your breasts. This will confuse it and lengthen the weaning process.
- If the baby is older, you can refer him to someone else when he asks to be breastfed. "Mum's out of milk, but Dad has. Go to him and ask him" can be a great way to distract a child who has learned to walk by encouraging him to turn to his father for a cup of milk. If he is smaller, he usually wants to be breastfed more for a feeling of well-being and protection than for hunger: in these cases a different type of distraction can be used. Try taking him out or find a toy he hasn't used for some time.
Step 6. Be patient
Weaning is often an emotionally and physically tough time for infants and slightly older children, who may have a tantrum for several days.
- Remember that breastfeeding not only gives your baby the nourishment it needs, it is also a time for pampering. Therefore, make sure he has the affection and attention he needs during this transition phase, as they are critical to emotional and social development and a sense of security and belonging. This will help him feel confident and understand that if he is not breastfed, it does not mean that he will not receive affection or protection.
- It is normal for him to wake up during sleep, especially if he was used to being breastfed before going to sleep or taking a nap. Be persistent, but patient.
- If your child is persistent and you are running out of patience, take a break. Ask a trusted friend to stay with him while you take a shower or go out for coffee. If you feel dejected, put the baby in a safe place, such as in the crib, and close the door. Just breathe deeply for a few minutes and calm down. It is never a bad idea to distance yourself and give yourself some time.
Part 2 of 3: Getting the milk out of the breast
Step 1. Prepare for a process that will take several days
Suddenly expressing milk to meet the baby's nutritional needs can be such a long process that it will take you almost a week to get used to it and about a year for your breasts to completely stop producing milk (although by then it will be quite poor.).
The procedure can be as painful as the breast congestion that occurs at the beginning of breastfeeding, when milk production is abundant. It may be helpful to take some ibuprofen or acetaminophen to relieve discomfort
Step 2. Wear a bra that fits snugly
Bras designed for high impact sportsmen can help compress the breasts and slow down milk production, but be careful they don't tighten too much.
- If it is too tight, it can cause the milk ducts to become blocked and, as a result, cause severe pain. Bring a bra that is no tighter than those designed for sporting activities.
- Likewise, avoid underwire bras, as the latter can also clog the milk ducts.
Step 3. Take a shower with your back facing the water
Avoid running water directly onto your chest and keep the temperature warm, but not hot.
The heat of the water can cause the milk to escape and increase milk production
Step 4. Place a kale leaf inside each bra cup
Cabbage is known to help with milk flow, although there are not enough studies to explain why.
- Wash the leaves and place them in the bra, directly on the skin. You can use them slightly cool or at room temperature.
- Leave the leaves inside the bra until they begin to wilt and replace them with fresh ones. If necessary, you can continue to follow this process until you have finished pumping the milk mechanically.
- Alternatively, she can try applying cold packs to relieve pain.
Step 5. Pump the milk only if necessary
Expressing milk (with a breast pump or by hand) may increase milk production, but sometimes it is the only way to relieve the pain caused by breast congestion.
Wait until you can tolerate it and press just enough to relieve the pressure. Try gently squeezing your breasts in the shower with your hand surrounding them just above the areola
Step 6. Consult your doctor about any medications that may possibly help you reduce milk supply
For some women, the use of a nasal decongestant during weaning is helpful.
- Pseudoephedrine, the active ingredient in many nasal decongestants, can decrease milk production as well as mucus production during allergy season.
- Many women rely on the consumption of herbs, such as sage, jasmine and peppermint, to decrease milk production. Contact your doctor for more information on this.
Part 3 of 3: Understanding the Process
Step 1. Keep in mind that breasts swell when filled with milk
It will become heavy and sore and you will likely feel uncomfortable.
- Breast congestion can create enormous discomfort: the breasts become sensitive, sore and quite turgid for almost 2-3 days. If it becomes hot to the touch or if you notice red streaks, contact your doctor immediately as you may have developed an infection.
- In addition, when due to breast congestion you abruptly stop breastfeeding, an obstruction of the milk ducts may occur. When a duct becomes blocked, you have the impression that a hard knot has formed which causes a feeling of tenderness to the touch. In these cases, it must be treated using warm compresses and gently massaging the lump. See your doctor if it doesn't get better after a day - it could be an infection.
Step 2. Expect breast discharge that can last for several weeks
They are normal during the weaning process, especially if you don't breastfeed a few times and your breasts swell.
- You may find that you are producing secretions when you hear the baby cry or even the thought of your baby. This is normal and will not last more than a few days.
- Purchase nursing pads so that you can dab any sudden secretions.
Step 3. Be aware that you may gain weight when you stop breastfeeding
Breastfeeding burns a lot of calories, so unless you reduce your calorie intake, you will gain a few pounds when you wean your baby.
- Since weaning can cause some difficulties for the body, it is better to start reducing calories gradually rather than following a crash diet right away.
- If you want to continue taking in calories as you did while breastfeeding, you need to increase your physical activity level to burn them.
Step 4. Realize that hormonal changes during weaning can affect mood
The body may take several weeks, if not longer, to fully return to its pre-pregnancy state, and until then, hormones may be subject to fluctuations.
For some women, it is normal to feel low after giving birth. This feeling of sadness is accompanied by irritability, anxiety, the urge to cry, and a general sense of dejection. Sometimes it can lead to depression as well. See your doctor if you feel unfit
Step 5. Seek support if you need it
It can be physically and emotionally difficult to wean your baby, so you may need to have someone to talk to.
- Talk to a friend or lactation consultant to learn more about the weaning process and what you are going through. Sometimes it can be reassuring to be told that your experience is normal.
- Consider contacting "La Leche League Italia" for further help and support. The site has a pretty simple interface and can be a great resource for a mother looking to wean her baby.
- If at any time you feel helpless or desperate, or if guilt and anxiety become overwhelming, call 911 for immediate help or see your doctor to find out what options you have to manage your anxiety.
Advice
- Avoid holding your baby in the same position you were nursing him in. He will expect similar behavior and will likely be disappointed when you don't bring him close to the breast.
- Avoid wearing low-cut tops that show your décolleté or bust. The baby may think it's time to feed and will be disappointed if he doesn't have milk, even though he sees the cleavage.
Warnings
- Be cautious when taking medications to reduce milk production. Learn about any side effects or complications. Always make an informed choice about everything you ingest.
- Never use homemade infant formula as a substitute for breast milk. Recipes available on the Internet or through friends do not contain the right balance of nutrients essential for the growth and development of the child.
