How To Find Out If A Shy Guy Likes You: 15 Steps

2024 Author: Samantha Chapman | [email protected]. Last modified: 2023-12-17 09:13

Shy guys are extremely reserved and can be difficult to understand. In general, they follow different rules, mainly because they don't know what the rules are and because they are too insecure. To find out if a shy guy likes you, try these tips and techniques.

Steps

Part 1 of 3: The Approach

Step 1. Don't ask blatantly if he likes you

Direct comparisons are the kryptonite of shy kids; not only will he deny his interest, but he will likely start avoiding you due to embarrassment. Always use a discreet approach when interacting with a shy guy.

Step 2. Don't ask his friends if he likes you

Confidentiality is the top priority of shy kids. If a shy guy likes you, chances are he hasn't told anyone, nor is he going to.

• Asking his friends has a very serious drawback: you may receive incorrect information. By being shy and not expressing his feelings often, you may get the idea that he is not interested when in reality he is not. This could be a severe psychological blow.
• Asking his friends also has the cons of passing the ball to him. When he knows - or imagines - that you like him, he'll think you want him to ask you out. This will make him feel pressured. As frustrating as it may be, you'll have to do most of the work yourself, helping him feel relaxed as he goes.

Step 3. Compare his behavior towards you with his behavior towards others

The behavior of shy guys can be so strange that it seems senseless. Instead of just analyzing the behavior towards you, compare it to how he behaves towards others. Look at the extra things he does with you - whether it be positive or negative. Is he kinder? Quieter? More nervous? More irritable? If he treats you differently than others, he certainly has strong feelings of some kind towards you.

Is it very quiet in your presence? Her inability to speak may be due to her nervousness - she has a crush on you, and she's so afraid to say something weird or stupid that she's decided it's best not to talk when you're around

Step 4. Interpret his body language

Instead of looking for the usual signs of interest (e.g., approaching you, touching you, and so on), look for signs that indicate her discomfort when you are together. If she looks down, crosses her arms, avoids eye contact, or has more nervous tics than usual, she may be making an effort to hide her interest in you.

• Does he play with his hands, clothes or hair when you talk to him? These are clear signs of nervousness; talking to you will shake him to the point that he won't be able to sit still.
• Sweat when is he with you? Sweating is another sign of nervousness. Sweating is an uncontrollable bodily function, so your forehead and armpits are likely to be dripping.
• Does he blush or swallow a lot when he's with you? The blush can be hard to notice, but on some guys it will be very noticeable: his face lights up and he looks like he just ran a mile. Swallowing is a sign that he knows he needs to speak but can't find the words.
• Is he often found near you, but never at your side? They may taste the closeness, but don't want to risk getting too close. If that's the case, it could mean he's just as attracted to you as you are to him.

Step 5. Try to catch him in the act while watching you

Since shy guys suppress their feelings far more than others, keeping their interest secret and sometimes avoiding the person they're infatuated with, they often attempt to steal glances to compensate. Observe him with peripheral vision to check if he is staring at you when he thinks you are not looking. If he does this often, he is certainly interested. Be careful though: if you look at him and he will immediately look away, he will surely feel embarrassed. Smile at him if you want to give him hope.

Do you completely avoid looking at you? Even shy guys look at girls sometimes. If he always avoids looking at you, he may be trying to hide his feelings. Notice if she looks at other girls to find out if it's general or just for you

Step 6. Pay attention to the way he talks to you

We all get nervous when we talk to the person we like, but for shy guys, it's even worse; usually, they will give you short, terse and abrupt answers or they will speak very quickly and stammer in panic. Again, notice if the conversations with you are even stranger than those with others.

• Does he give you monosyllable answers and refuse to elaborate? He is not uninterested in conversation; on the contrary, he is too interested in the conversation and does not want to say anything that would reveal his feelings for you.
• Are you more confident with your friends? His friends give him some psychological support. He still wishes not to say something wrong, but he will be more open to conversation.

Step 7. Notice if he becomes friends with your friends

It doesn't necessarily mean they like your friends; is looking for an excuse to get even closer, and wants to know about you from the people who know you best. Especially if he becomes friends with all of your friends and not with you, it could mean that he has feelings for you.

In this situation, make sure he is not flirting with your friends. If she does, she may actually feel something for another and not for you. Or he might do it to show you that he knows how to treat girls

Part 2 of 3: Really Find Out

Step 1. Ask him to do you a favor

Although shy guys will actively avoid pursuing their romantic interest, they will often take passive actions to show their affection. If he likes you, he will probably drop everything to help you - often whenever he can. However, do not abuse your power over him. It's a mean thing to do, especially with a shy guy; in fact, the cause of his shyness may lie in the fact that he is used to being treated badly.

• Calmly and sweetly ask to bring your books or backpack to the next class. If you need an excuse, tell him your back hurts and you don't want to make things worse.
• Ask him to help you with your difficult tasks. If he's not good at math, don't ask them to help you with geometry, you'll just make him more nervous. Find out what he is good at and ask him to explain something to you.
• Ask him to exchange a part of your lunch. If he accepts without hesitation, that's a good sign.

Step 2. Compliment him and see how he reacts

It doesn't have to be who knows what - a simple "Great job on that relationship of yours" or "Hey, thanks for helping me with the math" is enough. You may struggle to compliment him, especially if you're just as shy, but this method will go a long way in making him more confident when you're together and will let you find out if he actually has something for you. Here are the most important things to note in his reaction:

• His reaction if he likes you

  • He stutters, falls silent, or blatantly embarrasses or becomes even more shy.
  • Return your compliment, even if in a slightly awkward way.

• His reaction if he doesn't like you

  • Your compliment has absolutely no effect.
  • Your compliment seems to displease or annoy him.

  

  Step 3. Talk to him on the internet

  Many shy kids feel more comfortable writing behind a screen rather than talking to each other. Try starting conversations on Facebook or other instant messengers and use these tips to figure out if he's trying to flirt with you.

  • If he's sending you a request on Facebook, that's a good sign. Wait to submit the request yourself if you just met him. Wait and see if he does it. Guys are usually able to do online what they would not be able to do in person. And he definitely wants to get to know you better if he sends you that request.
  • If he chats a lot online, and he likes sharing things with you, it's because he loves the chance to talk to you, but he wants to control the situation. He feels the situation more in control now that he doesn't have to worry about how he looks in person.
  • Ask him questions and see if he answers with questions of his own. Shy guys are pretty good at asking questions (they don't want to have to talk all the time). If he often asks you about your past, your goals, or just your day, take it as a good sign.
  • Don't limit conversations to online chat. It's okay to start talking to him online or in text, but eventually, you'll need to approach him and have him open up in person. Otherwise he will feel too comfortable on the internet and will need even more courage to jump in person.

  Part 3 of 3: Taking Control

  

  Step 1. Start interacting with him in places where he feels comfortable

  Shy guys always feel like a fish out of water. This can make even simple things like talking to people at school extremely complicated. However, a shy guy is very likely to have his own personal place where he can feel "safe", where he feels as comfortable as at home. If you can find that place, and most of all you can be welcome, that is the first step towards becoming more than friends.

  What that special place is is entirely up to him. For some it is the football field, for others it is the bookshop. Find out what he likes to do and commit to getting into his comfort zone

  

  Step 2. Initially accept that you are just friends

  Shy guys tend to stay in the friend zone for very long periods, continuing to wonder with pain whether or not they should ask you out. For them, the friend zone is a way to be able to be close to you and talk to you, but without risking anything by asking you for a gallant outing. Enjoying your presence without risk is something that many shy guys particularly appreciate.

  Don't be discouraged, and don't believe anyone who tells you you can't go out with him once you become friends with him. It is simply not true. You are the architect of your success

  

  Step 3. Pay attention to your own body language

  You've already tried reading his to find out if he's interested in you; now is the time to analyze yours to know if you are sending the right signals. The key is to communicate a sense of openness towards him, rather than the other way around:

  • Smile, take off your earphones, talk to the people around you, and laugh whenever you feel like doing it. All of this will convey to him and others that you are an easygoing person.
  • If you hang around on your own in a corner, focused on your laptop, with headphones on and ignoring the people around you, he'll feel petrified at the thought of approaching you to ask for anything. Avoid "closing signals" at all costs.

  

  Step 4. Be patient while you wait for him to come to you

  At best, once you show your interest in her she will finally arm herself with courage and ask you out. At that point you will know that he really likes you and you will have no doubts for the entire time you are dating. By managing to enter "his world", becoming friends, paying attention to your body language and having a lot of patience, he will eventually ask you out if he likes you. It's just a matter of time.

  

  Step 5. If all the advice outlined so far has not been successful, ask him out yourself

  You can text him as many as you want, or lick your lips so many times that you feel like you've eaten the lip gloss. Sometimes the only thing to do if he is too shy or does not understand the signals … is to take the initiative and ask him out. Don't worry - it's not an out-of-this-world thing, and many beautiful and intelligent women have already done it. If you like him, it doesn't really matter who asks what to whom. What matters is enjoying a beautiful sunset together at the end of the day.