Getting your parents to let you have a boyfriend takes a lot of courage, especially if they're not very permissive. So ask them to talk about it directly. Begin the speech with confidence. Make sure they have a positive mood.
Steps
Step 1. Tell your parents that you have thought about it a lot, but would like to know their opinion because you respect them
Step 2. Tell them about your situation and talk about the guy you would like to date
Step 3. Emphasize that you feel mature enough to date someone
Knowing their fears, reassure them by saying that you will be careful and you will not get into trouble. Give them some concrete examples of why you think you are a responsible person: do you help with housework? do you get good grades and don't get in trouble?
Step 4. Explain that you will be responsible for your actions and will face the consequences if something goes wrong
Step 5. Don't compare yourself to other people your age
Your parents don't take this trick. Never.
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If your parents tell you no, don't cry and don't immediately ask "but why?". Try to appear disappointed and sad but without tears. Acting immature won't help you get their approval. It's best to let it settle down. Wait a few days, during which he mentions the boy but without exceeding, then try again.
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Step 6. Talk to them about him
He illustrates his personality, tells what school he does, what he does, what he would like to do when he grows up, what his family is like and so on. This will allow them to get to know him. Suggest that they meet him first, see what he is like, then decide.
Step 7. Answer their final question with maturity:
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If your parents say yes, hug them and give them a kiss to show your love and happiness!
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If they say no, try to ask again or wait until the right time to start dating a guy. Or ask them if you could go out in a group, with your friends and him. This way they will feel safer: you will be with friends rather than face to face with him.
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Advice
- The best time to ask your parents something is when they are in a good mood. Certainly not when you just got a bad grade.
- Try to be mature. Don't scream or cry and ask them why you can't have a boyfriend. This would make them think that you will never grow up and that you would not be able to handle a relationship with a guy.
- Be prepared to take "no" for an answer. Wait a little while to ask again - trying every day would irritate them and not cause them to have a better opinion of you.
- Tell your parents about the meeting place. If they know that you will meet in the right place and at an appropriate time (for example in a bookstore), they will feel less tense.
- Inform your parents about the exits. They will feel safer and give you more privacy in the future.
- Stay calm during the speech until they say yes. At that point you can give vent to your happiness.
- Tell your parents that he is a nice guy and that he is not the kind of person to get into trouble.
- If every other attempt fails, don't tell your parents you have a boyfriend or let them know that you clearly understand that they said no.
- Invite the boy's parents over to your house for dinner. Show them what kind of family he has and what environment he grew up in.
- Try to schedule an exit with him and your parents. It can be embarrassing, but it will show them what you and your future boyfriend do when you go out.
- If your parents say no, ask them if you and the boy would like to be just friends. You will then grow the relationship over time.
- Invite your friends to your house and have them talk to your parents. This may ease the problem and your parents may feel relieved to see that your decision is supported by others.
Warnings
- If your parents say no, don't make a scene, it will end badly and you should just wait longer to have a boyfriend.
- Parents have good reasons not to let kids out, such as protecting them from violence or teenage pregnancy. These reasons must be respected: Respect will show your parents that you are a mature person.
- Make sure the person you want to date deserves this. It may be helpful to wait a day or two before asking your parents to make sure you really like him.
- Make sure you are ready, you could throw yourself into a relationship when you are not yet the right age or he is not ready.
- Your parents may not allow you to have a boyfriend but allow you to go out with him as a friend.
