Accepting and welcoming dissent is difficult for those who are perpetually seeking harmony and cooperation. However, without dissent and divergent opinions, the world would be a boring and conformist place. Welcoming dissent is useful for learning new ideas, shaping your opinions to compromise and finding solutions that can benefit everyone. Learn to change your perspective on disagreement and find out how your interpersonal interactions will improve exponentially.
Steps
Part 1 of 3: Dissent and Reaction
Step 1. Respectfully express your disagreement
Shouting "You are wrong!" it certainly does not help to respectfully express one's disagreement. Similarly, it is useless to behave as if your own opinions were the only acceptable ones, a bit as if you were saying, "This is nonsense." Such an attitude conveys the feeling that your opinion is the only acceptable one and that those of others are irrelevant. Instead, try to make a peaceful preliminary statement before expressing your opinion:
- "Interesting. We seem to have different points of view. Can I explain to you why I see it this way?"
- "Really? The observations I made are different, probably because I have had different experiences …".
- "I value your ideas about it and understand why you are concerned about trying something different. Maybe we could consider a new approach."
- "I just wanted to offer you a different alternative. If you were interested, I'd be happy to give you more details."
Step 2. Practice active listening
Once you have stated your opinion, make sure that your interlocutor has the opportunity to have their say. This means listening to him actively, carefully and with respect. Here are some principles of active listening:
- Look at your interlocutor and show him to listen to him without distractions;
- Avoid intruding until he has completely finished speaking;
- Encourage him to continue by consenting and encouraging him (example: "And then?");
- Repeat what he told you to make sure you understand the message (example: "So, if I understand correctly, you are saying that …");
- Rework the interlocutor's message by emphasizing his emotions (example: "Apparently you really believe in your beliefs").
- Share your views and thoughts about the message without judging.
Step 3. Show empathy
To prevent an unpleasant discussion from overheating and turning into a fight, communicate in solidarity by expressing observations, emotions, needs and requests (in that order).
To show empathy and solidarity, you could explain that you understand the situation by talking about your past experiences. For example, he says, "I've had a similar experience in the past and I've felt just like you." Obviously, the connection has to be sincere, don't make anything up
Step 4. Refer to shared interests
In a context of disagreement, it's easy to fixate on your goals and overlook the big picture. To catch up on a discussion that is losing its original purpose, remind the other party of what you have in common on the matter. This allows you to return to the focus of the conversation and be on the same side.
You can say, "Let's consider the goal we have in common. We both want … What can we do to make sure we meet our needs? What tools can we use to achieve this?"
Step 5. Recognize that disagreement takes courage
Be sure to thank your interlocutor for having the courage to express their opinion and congratulate yourself if you disagree. Disagreement means that your interlocutor is introducing a different perspective and is offering you the chance to broaden your horizons.
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It also means that your interlocutor appreciates and trusts you enough to voice a different opinion in your presence (you can also congratulate yourself for promoting such openness). Show that you value his courage by saying:
- "You know, although on the one hand I still think we have different approaches, now I understand your point a little better. Thank you for discussing it with me."
- "I very much appreciate that you took the trouble to explain clearly what you think about this situation. I have never considered it from this perspective before and it gave me the opportunity to reflect. I will definitely consider the points. you mentioned ".
Improve Performance in Life Step 1 Step 6. Look for easy ways to resolve disagreements
If you have an easy-to-remember acronym, you can effectively resolve issues as quickly as possible. For conflict resolution, think of the acronym LEAP, which in English stands for listen, "listen", emphatize, "identify with", agree, "agree", and partner, "connect." You can use it when you are in the middle of a dissent, eager to come to an agreement quickly and effectively. Is formed from:
- L (listen): Listen to the other person's message.
- E (emphatize): identify with the other person's point of view, think about why they processed this message.
- A (agree): agree with some aspects of his message to find elements in common.
- P (partner): to relate to the other person to find a mutually advantageous and adaptable solution.
Part 2 of 3: Avoid Obstructing Resolution
Become an Improved Step 1. Don't tell anyone that your views are "for their own good" or you would treat them like a child
Think about one thing: if such a sentence has no effect on a child, just imagine how useless it can be for an adult. Basically, it's like I'm telling him, "You are too stupid to figure out what the solution or the best way to do things is. I know and I will impose my will on you." This can exacerbate the disagreement rather than mitigate it.
Absolutely avoid using this phrase. Instead, recognize your interlocutor's way of thinking, admit what he is already doing well, and replace the desire to impose your will by saying, "I admire what you do and I don't want to change what you feel is right for you. I just wanted to share mine. experience because I've already done something similar: maybe one or two ideas might come in handy"
Attract People to Buy Your Birds Step 3 Step 2. Try not to express disagreement by using an excuse
Say "I'm sorry" only to apologize for wronging or hurting someone, not to introduce a disappointment or make your point clear.
- For example, you can say "I'm sorry for hurting you", while it is not acceptable to say "I'm sorry, but you're wrong" or "I'm sorry for your bother". With these last sentences, you move away from the interlocutor and try to excuse an action or lack of action.
- Instead, try the following sentence when expressing disagreement: "Sorry if you didn't like what I told you, but …" becomes "I feel bad for causing a misunderstanding between us. What can I do to fix it?".
Achieve Greatness Through Humility Step 10 Step 3. In some cases, you have to accept that you disagree
If the discussion comes to a standstill, it's best to start talking about something you agree on. In fact, the more you insist, the more your interlocutor will tend to get stuck. He will then end up disagreeing for the sheer sake of it, to avoid "submitting" to your will or for self-sake.
Be a Friend to Someone with Trichotillomania Step 5 Step 4. Do not assume that your interlocutor needs your guidance
Remember that he is able to figure out and work things out for himself when you step back. Make your preferences clear, but give them the freedom to decide how they want to achieve a constructive result.
For example, instead of saying, "You got stuck on this idea. Let me tell you how you should do it," he says, "I understand why it bothers you. Please, if you need help considering solutions, tell me."
Part 3 of 3: Learning the Benefits of Dissent
Avoid Becoming a Victim of Identity Theft Step 4 Step 1. Remember that dissent is not synonymous with conflict
Sometimes a disagreement can cause conflict, but it can also lead to constructive discussions and teach you something. As long as you are willing to discuss it, learning more about an opinion or perspective other than your own will probably broaden your understanding of an issue.
Avoid Mistakes when Buying a Home Step 12 Step 2. Try to be open-minded, that is, be willing to listen to and accept ideas or opinions that are different from yours
Open-mindedness has many benefits, including having less prejudice, becoming more interesting and problem-solving. Also, since open-minded people are more receptive to change, they also suffer less from stress.
- To keep an open mind in the face of a disagreement, ask a lot of questions. Try to understand how and why your interlocutor has come to a conclusion that you do not agree with. You may find that he has had experiences that you have not had and that such experiences can enlighten you.
- Asking open questions and listening carefully is the absolute best way to discover your interlocutor's ideas and knowledge. Additionally, these strategies can allow both of you to take a break from disagreement.
Avoid Being Manipulated by People Step 1 Step 3. Consider the disagreement in terms of diversity
A famous quote goes: "When everyone thinks the same, nobody thinks much". Strive to see dissent as an opportunity to open up to greater diversity and varying opinions (just as you would view the need to diversify your staff, friendships, or stock portfolio).
Remember that people from different backgrounds and cultures may have very different ideas for their education and experiences. Their experiences have the same validity as yours. Try to find links rather than highlight the differences. By mixing different perspectives, it is possible to find a universal and sustainable solution, which is different from imposing an order that is only right for yourself and your life experience
Advice
Know your limits and what makes you lose your temper when you disagree. Many people who strictly avoid disagreements are too easily offended and emotionally upset. This happens because avoiding disagreement does not allow you to learn to deal with it constructively. In this case, it is recommended that you read self-help guides on topics such as non-violent communication techniques or sign up for a course on dealing with contrasts, so as to acquire constructive expressions and methods to respond whenever you feel pressured during a divergence
Warnings
- Don't use disagreement as a pretext to belittle another person's ideas. Always respect their thoughts and ideas, even if you don't intend to agree.
- Always avoiding disagreement can be a sign of passivity or disinterest in others. Being passive in life can cause problems such as being too accommodating with others or being used.
