If despite your personal successes you feel a constant sense of inadequacy, it could be a symptom of impostor syndrome. It is a fairly common disorder that damages self-esteem. Often those who suffer from this syndrome fear being seen as a person who is not very credible or dishonest, when in reality they are very competent. If you experience such sensations, take some steps to identify symptoms, mitigate the effects of the disorder, and seek help to combat it.
Steps
Part 1 of 3: Recognizing the Imposter Syndrome
Step 1. Ask about potential symptoms
Ask yourself a series of questions developed by some scholars to assess if you have this disorder. Read them and write the answers to each of the following questions. Don't think too much. Just write down the first thought that comes to your mind.
- What do you think about everything you have accomplished in your life?
- What do you think when you make a mistake?
- What do you think when you are successful in something?
- What effect do you have when you receive constructive criticism?
- Have you ever felt like you were deceiving someone?
Step 2. Learn to recognize the thoughts and feelings that characterize the impostor syndrome
Read your answers. If you tend to belittle your successes, doubt your abilities, fear making mistakes, or fail to constructively view the criticism you receive, you may be suffering from this disorder. For example, if you believe you are "lucky" or think that your achievements so far are not "important", you probably don't take your accomplishments seriously.
- Also, if in consideration of your mistakes you are led to believe that you are not "prepared enough" or "not done a perfect job", you may be suffering from delusions of perfectionism. Often this attitude is part of the criteria for evaluating the impostor syndrome.
- If criticism of your work or ideas disturbs you to the point that you doubt your performance, this can also be part of the impostor syndrome.
- If you have felt that you are "deceiving" those around you and have feared that you will be "discovered" or "seen" as a "fake" or "cheater" person, you are probably suffering from this disorder.
- Note that these symptoms are most often considered part of the impostor syndrome, even though the latter is not recognized as a mental disorder.
Step 3. Ask yourself more direct questions
If you still don't know if your thoughts and feelings are a warning sign of this syndrome, try asking yourself more directly. For example, answer yes or no to the following questions:
- Have you ever thought that you don't deserve the successes you have achieved?
- Are you afraid that someone is convinced that you do not give the right weight to the position you have conquered?
- Do you always consider your successes as lucky breaks or opportunities that you couldn't help but grasp because you were in the right place at the right time?
- Do you feel like you are deceiving people?
- Do you think others think too highly of your personal accomplishments?
- How many times have you said yes to these questions? If there are at least two, there is a good chance that you have this syndrome.
Part 2 of 3: Mitigating the Effects of the Syndrome on Your Mind
Step 1. Keep your self-critical spirit at bay as soon as it arises
Get used to handling your most critical thoughts as soon as they arise. This way, you will be able to keep the imposter syndrome symptoms under control. For example, whenever you find yourself mulling over a mistake or thinking your efforts weren't enough, stop and remember that no one is perfect.
- Here's another important thing to keep in mind: Continued insecurity won't allow you to focus on your next goal. In these cases, regain control of your attention so that you don't dwell on the more negative aspects, especially when you have a task to do.
- If you are obsessed with a negative thought, just think, "It's the impostor syndrome that's talking." You will be surprised at how useful it will be.
Step 2. Re-formulate the interpretation of your successes
You can assign the authorship of your victories to luck or chance when in reality they are the result of your skills and hard work. Fortunately, you have the opportunity to review your beliefs in a way that does not underestimate your qualities. Start by asking yourself, "Have I actively contributed to my successes? Of course!"
- Congratulate yourself when you reach an important milestone. Of course, anyone can look back, observe everything they have achieved and imagine doing it differently, but it is unhealthy and productive. Instead, remember that you have earned the right to rejoice in the successes you have achieved.
- Similarly, thank others when they compliment you. While you may be tempted to belittle your importance by saying, "Well, I was just lucky", don't do it and try to answer, "Thank you, I'm grateful to you."
Step 3. Don't be disheartened by small mistakes
Let's assume you are a computer genius. During a company meeting you did not find the right words to express your opinion and you did not feel up to the level of your colleagues. Well, remember that you are in charge of all the company's computer programming. Surely you are more capable and valuable than any of the most skilled speakers in the boardroom.
Also look at your failures from another perspective. When you make a mistake or take a misstep, don't be discouraged by insecurity. Rather, think, "It is a learning opportunity. The next time such a scenario presents itself, I will be more prepared and have the right tools to deal with it."
Step 4. Keep in mind all the things you know how to do
Try to stop and objectively evaluate your skills. Often people suffering from impostor syndrome are intelligent and have achieved numerous successes. At the same time, they have unrealistic personal expectations: a genius is not necessarily capable of everything.
- Try to write down everything you have accomplished and what skills you possess in order to achieve other successes.
- Whenever you question yourself, imagine yourself getting something done or impressing your audience with a relationship. This way, you will not only recall your past successes, but you can also prepare yourself for the next one. At the worst, thinking about your accomplishments will help you stay calm and relieve the symptoms of impostor syndrome.
Part 3 of 3: Asking for Help from Colleagues and Professionals
Step 1. Join a support group
To externalize your mood and learn how to manage certain mental patterns, try comparing yourself with people who are going through the same problems as you. Search the Internet or contact your doctor to ask about which support groups can help.
- When attending meetings, you need to have two goals in mind: on the one hand, to express your sense of insecurity and inadequacy and the thoughts that accompany it; on the other hand, to listen to the advice offered by others. They may point you to some methods by which they have been able to solve problems similar to yours.
- Sometimes, simply admitting that you feel like an impostor and recognizing that same feeling in others can help lessen and keep the negative effects of feeling inadequate at bay.
Step 2. Choose a mentor
It pays to cultivate a personal relationship with someone in a high-level position especially in competitive environments. This friendship can be especially useful if the other person has had similar experiences to yours, for example if they have had an academic career or worked in an industry dominated by the presence of men. Consider her capable of offering you support through her personal stories.
- For example, it could help you recognize what you are worth and give the right importance to your personal achievements, but also make you notice that each person has their doubts and that thanks to difficulties you have the opportunity to express your true potential.
- To build a relationship with a prospective mentor, try to see yourself regularly (or at an appropriate frequency for both) with a more experienced colleague or even a manager. If you can, go to his office once a week.
Step 3. Consider helping others
To value your skills, try to teach others what you have learned. An example is volunteering: you could explain to people less experienced than you how your profession works. For example, if you are a photographer, consider giving free photography lessons once a month in a middle school to kids who wish to participate.
By making yourself useful, you will not only feel better, but you can also improve your skills and value what you can do while sharing it with others
Step 4. Consult a mental health professional
If negative thoughts begin to interfere in your life, consult a psychologist or psychotherapist. Imposter syndrome often goes unnoticed and prevents people from leading a happy and fulfilling life. If anxiety and worries take over, make an appointment with a mental health professional immediately.
- Since impostor syndrome is not recognized as a mental disorder, it is likely that your therapist will advise you to take measures similar to those mentioned in this article.
- For example, she may recommend that you establish a stronger or more open relationship with a mentor or colleague you trust, write down any symptoms that arise, and continue psychotherapy.
