Joining two houses takes a lot of work, but if you can plan carefully you can make it easier and more fun. First, get rid of anything you don't really use. Try to figure out which objects you absolutely must keep, and create a new space by combining everyone's objects. Finally, joining two houses can also mean organizing themselves in a different way, so as to make different people with different habits coexist.
Steps
Part 1 of 3: Deciding What to Keep
Step 1. Discuss your expectations before starting
Combining two houses may seem like a very simple thing, if you consider it only from the practical side of making the lives and possessions of several people coexist in one place. It can actually become quite a complex process, as it may require you to give up some things you care about a lot. Adapting your lifestyle to someone else's is a gradual process that requires many compromises. Before starting the union, talk to the person you are going to live with, and discuss in advance the bigger decisions you will face, so that you don't get caught up in tension later on.
- Discuss your respective plans for the new home. What will it look like? Will each room contain a set of the things of each of you?
- Discuss the items you both care about. Are there things your partner will give up? Are there things you absolutely don't want to give up? Establish these limits before anything else.
Step 2. Empty your closets and closets
Whether you are moving to a new home, or someone is moving in with you, you will likely need a lot of space. Take some time to completely empty all your closets, closets, and any other places you store things you don't use often. Try to understand what you will need, and what you can do without; find a way to get rid of all the superfluous. Divide the objects into three groups: "hold", "give away" and "uncertain". You can revisit the last group in case you find yourself having more space available than you thought.
- Take a look at your items and think about how often you use them. A good rule of thumb is to get rid of anything you haven't used for at least a year.
- You can try to sell items you no longer need, so that you can also make some money. You can set up a stall at a flea market, or place an ad on the internet. What you can't sell you can always donate to charity.
- Remember that it is much easier to get rid of items before you start preparing for the move. You will have fewer things to worry about.
Step 3. Get rid of all duplicates
One of the most difficult things when joining two houses is deciding what to do in case of duplicates: keep the objects of one or the other? Depending on how much space you have available, you will probably need to get rid of furniture and smaller items, such as kitchen utensils. Who needs two toasters? Sit down and make a list of all the duplicates, decide which items are in the best condition and therefore to keep. Here are some items you will need to consider:
- Furniture: beds, dressers, bedside tables, sofas, tables, chairs, etc.
- Appliances: blenders, toasters, washing machines, dryers, coffee machines, etc.
- Kitchen utensils: can openers, bottle openers, pots, pans, cake tins, etc.
- Linen: sheets, towels, etc.
Step 4. Make a list of all the "to keep" things
Some items can have sentimental value, and even if there's no point in keeping them, you don't want to throw them away. Decide together with your partner which objects you absolutely do not want to give up. If they are very large items, discuss where you could put them, and consider whether it is really necessary to keep them.
- Make sure your list isn't much longer than your partner's. You should have the same rights regarding the things to keep; consider it as a compromise exercise.
- Try, at first, to limit yourself to the things that you actually need, and only later to the things that are not necessary but that could still find space in the new home.
Step 5. Consider clothing and personal items
Think about where you can store them, as you will have less space in your new home. You and your partner must both have a clear idea of the space available to you.
- You may be used to having free space in the closet. After the move, however, you may need to make the change of seasons, and store some items in a closet, so that everyone can have their own space.
- Consider using vacuum boxes or bags to store clothing you don't use often.
- Organize your documents. If you have documents dating back many years, try to figure out if you can destroy them.
- Free yourself or store all those items that you don't want to become common property. Since you will be living together, you cannot expect the same privacy as when you lived alone. If you have something embarrassing, think about it before taking it indoors.
Part 2 of 3: Draw Schematics for the Rooms
Step 1. Draw a floor plan of the house
It might seem like a hassle, but it will make your life easier when you need to move. The design doesn't have to be perfect; however try to make a sketch of each room keeping the same scale. Measure the rooms in the new house. Write the measurements of each wall on the respective drawings. In this way you can better plan the organization of the rooms.
- Include windows, doors, built-in cabinets, kitchen islands, and anything that could affect the arrangement of the furniture.
- Take pictures too, so it will be easier for you to imagine the final result.
Step 2. Decide where to place the bulkier furniture
Before you even prepare for the move, decide where you will place all the furniture. This way you can take them directly to the correct room, without having to pile them up at the entrance while you decide.
- Measure the furniture to decide where to put it. Check out the floor plan and imagine the effect each piece of furniture could have.
- Take fabric samples from sofas, chairs, and all upholstered furniture. It will be easier for you to understand if the furniture fits together or not, even before moving it.
- Consider each piece of furniture individually, without thinking about the organization they have now.
- To arrange objects in a pleasant way, follow the main rules of decoration. For example, sofas should be surrounded by little space on all sides. In the room, your bed should be the focal point, rather than set aside in a corner.
Step 3. Find a decorative pattern that suits both of you
Whether you are moving into each other's home, or into a completely new home, try to find a decorative style that brings all your possessions together seamlessly. You may want to repaint the walls, install new lights, change the curtains etc. to make the new home welcoming for the whole family.
- Consider whether everyone in the house may have their own personal space.
- Decide which rooms will be "for the family" and have them reflect the personality of the whole house.
- Consider renovating the furniture. A good upholstery shop can change the upholstery, but also add or remove padding, and change shape. You can choose the new fabric together, and you can more easily find something that both of you like.
Step 4. When preparing the move, separate the boxes by room
Now that it's finally time for the move, go through the whole house and put everything in the boxes. Make sure fragile items are packed together with soft material, so they don't break in transit. If you use a moving service, be sure to give them all the information on where they need to move the boxes.
- Use colors to separate the boxes, and tell your partner to do the same. For example, items that go into the living room may have a purple label, red kitchen items, and so on.
- Make sure the boxes are brought to the right room in the new home.
Part 3 of 3: Creating a New Home Together
Step 1. Respect everyone's preferences
Joining two houses means having to make compromises. Your lifestyle will change, but don't consider it a bad thing; it is very exciting. Help each other make the change easier, respect each other's ideas, and if you disagree, discuss them.
- Don't start off on the wrong foot by being stubborn about small things. If, for example, you have three different blenders, you should be willing to do without them for the good of the house.
- Don't fight over family heirlooms. If your partner wants to keep grandpa's table, don't try to convince him otherwise, even if you think it's in bad taste. If it's a family heirloom, it's only fair that it stays in the family.
Step 2. Be open minded about the final results
The new house won't look like the old one, and you shouldn't even want to. You are combining your taste with that of your partner to create something new. With a little attention, you can create a new space where you both recognize each other.
- Commit to creating a new home rather than trying to replicate the old one. If your partner moves in with you, be willing to make big changes as well.
- Remember that from now on you will have to make decisions regarding the house together.
Step 3. Involve the children
Joining two houses can be difficult for children. For this you should try to involve them in decisions. They may get nervous, but giving them the chance to make decisions about their new home will make them calmer. Involve them in preparing the boxes, decorating, and creating a new space for them.
- Let the children decide which toys to keep and which to give away.
- Get the kids excited about the new home. Tell them it will be an adventure.
Step 4. Think of a personalized plan that meets everyone's needs
Joining two houses means joining two lifestyles. Think about anything that could be affected by the move; make sure that the new home can accommodate various hobbies, pets, etc.
- If you have pets, where can they stay? Where will they sleep? Where will you keep their bowls and their food?
- Before you even move in, decide how to distribute the closets and closets, so you can start organizing everything right away.
- Think of how to share some "extra" spaces, such as a corner that can become a study, a reading room, etc.
Step 5. Share spaces and don't give orders
Don't make the experience unpleasant by trying to control everything. Make sure everyone contributes to the new home, you both need to feel comfortable.
Allow the person with the fewest objects to contribute to the decoration of the house, or of a personal space. For example an office, a reading corner, a gymnastics area, etc
Advice
- If someone moves into your home, take the time to clear space in cupboards, medicine cabinets, drawers, closets, etc. Clean and tidy up before they move.
- After the move, you should look for something to buy together for the new home.
- Joining two houses is stressful. After you complete the move, take a moment to celebrate. Give your partner a plant, or something for the new home. You can also open a bottle of wine and spend a romantic evening.
- Throwing away items that have been given to you by relatives may not be a good idea. Call the original owners and ask them if they would like their items back. Sometimes gifts are made with the idea that certain objects remain in the family; don't assume you have the right to throw them away.
- Estimate how much space each one will need. You don't have to combine just furniture and appliances, they all have what's this.
- Something that may seem superfluous to one may be important to the other. If the cartoon box from your childhood is not to be mistaken for waste, make sure the other person knows about it.
- Many upholstered furniture has extra fabric strips. Look underneath the furniture or cushions. You can remove a fabric swatch from here or from another hidden point. You could also take a piece of the excess hem. But be careful not to damage the furniture. Sometimes when you buy a piece of furniture you are also given additional pieces of fabric in case you need them. Or you can try going to the store where you bought the furniture.
- Send postcards with the new address. Be careful before announcing everyone that you are going to live with someone. Some conservative relatives may not see him willingly before marriage.
- Some thrift shops or charities may pick up furniture you don't need, but it's best to contact them a couple of months in advance. Set a date even if you only have a few pieces of furniture, you will still have to find the time.
- Don't forget to go through the boxes containing the Christmas decorations if you've had a special holiday with your ex. It is not pleasant to decorate your first Christmas tree with your partner and find an ornament that says "Couple's First Christmas" that doesn't refer to you.
- Make sure you don't have framed photos of your exes. Put them in an album and reuse the frame.
Warnings
- Discuss bills and all other business decisions. Financial problems are the main cause of marriage disputes.
- Don't make all decisions without consulting your partner. The house belongs to both.
