Asking someone to spend some time with you can seem like a huge step at the start of a new friendship, whether it's a classmate, co-worker, or someone you met at a party. Even if you have some inhibitions at first, you don't have to stress out about inviting him out. Tell him you'd like to see him sometime or ask him to take you somewhere. Don't be afraid to spontaneously ask him to take a walk together.
Steps
Part 1 of 3: Make a Generic Proposal
Step 1. Ask informally
If you're thinking about dating, don't be too direct. Keep calm so you don't feel desperate when you ask her out. Take a deep breath and use your normal tone of voice.
- You will look too impatient if you say, "You are so good. I would really like to spend more time with you."
- Be casual when addressing a classmate. Try saying, "Whenever we talk there is always confusion. We should see each other after school."
- If you've had a good time with someone at a party, say, "It was great. Would you like to meet us some more time?"
Step 2. Use a common interest as a pretext to see someone again
You may have a hard time dating someone for no particular reason. If you know you share a passion, use it to your advantage. Tell her it would be fun to grow her together sometime.
- If you often stop and talk to a co-worker about a TV show, propose to watch it together. In this case, you know that you have some free time when they broadcast it and that each episode has a set duration that allows you to separate once it is over.
- You could make an appointment with someone who trains at the gym. Since you are probably dating at roughly the same time, ask him if he would like to train with you. Tell him, "This way, each of us will have a personal assistant and we could push each other to work hard."
- In another context, try asking: "I noticed that we attend the painting course at the same times. Would you like to meet and paint together sometime?".
Step 3. Don't fear rejection
There is no point in asking someone to review you if you think you don't agree. Put yourself in the order of ideas that you are a pleasant person and that you will receive a yes for an answer. If you trust yourself and make a direct invitation, your interlocutor will be more likely to accept. The risk of rejection is higher if you are shy.
- Don't say, "You probably have a lot of commitments and friends already, but we could go out together sometime if you like. It's okay if you have other plans."
- For an example, think of a co-worker you would like to date. Look for him in the staff room and say, "We should find something interesting to do out of here." It is a simple invitation, it shows your interest and offers an opening to an eventual evolution of knowledge.
- If you go to an association and someone has caught your attention, say, "You know, we meet here every week. Would you like to eat together after the next meeting?". Again, this is a direct invitation that shows momentum towards a person who might be interested.
Part 2 of 3: Suggest a Specific Day to See Each Other
Step 1. Tell him when it suits you best to meet
When you ask someone out, have a clear idea of when you are free. Think about three days available in the next two weeks that you would like to see it. Propose them and see if it is free on one of the indicated days.
- If you don't make an appointment, it is unlikely that you will meet. If you give your availability on three different days, there is a good chance that you accept.
- You probably save one evening off a week in case you find something interesting to do. For example, tell him you're usually available on Tuesday nights and ask him if the next one is okay.
- For example: "I would like to do something in the next two Saturdays. Would you like to stroll around the shops in the center and then have lunch together?".
Step 2. Invite him to an approaching event
If there is a party or meeting, invite it even if you are not the organizer. Since it will be held on an already established day, any refusal from him will have nothing to do with your presence. It is also a way to see it without feeling the tension of a two-person meeting.
- If you go to a sports party, don't hesitate to invite it. It is an event open to all, it is held at a specific time and many people will come to socialize with.
- If you don't have anything special to do, arrange something with a group of friends to invite the person you want to get to know better.
- It doesn't have to be a private event. Ask her if she'd like to go to a festival and take a ride together. Probably he had already thought about it and, moreover, it is a public and recreational event.
Step 3. Schedule a weekend appointment
Everyone has their commitments during the week, while at the weekend they are more free. If you typically only see someone on weekdays, ask them to do something on the weekend. Similarly, you can think of something for the morning, afternoon, and evening.
- Weekends are ideal because people are more willing to stay late on Fridays and Saturdays and have more free time on Saturdays and Sundays.
- In addition, theatrical events, festivals, festivals, concerts and patronal feasts are organized on weekends.
- You could propose: "After this long week I need to ease some tension. Would you like to come to the shooting range on Friday after work?"
Part 3 of 3: Being Spontaneous
Step 1. Invite him to lunch
If you're at work or finishing college at lunchtime, ask him if he wants to have lunch with you. If each of you already has lunch ready, you might want to sit down and eat together. If not, invite him for a bite in a trattoria. It's perfect because both of you can get something to eat without feeling the tension of a real date.
- It doesn't have to be immediate. Ask him to have dinner together when you are done with work or to meet for a few hours after your schedule is over.
- If you're away from a late night party, invite him for a croissant.
Step 2. Suggest an outing after a class or meeting
If you work together, attend the same association or take the same college course, ask him if he'd like to do something when you're done. Offer it to him when you see him or as soon as you are free.
- He may be very busy, but people always have some time to finish their commitments. Take advantage of the dead moments.
- Try saying: "I have a couple of hours free after the course. Would you like to take a walk in the cloister?". It is an invitation to get to know each other better that does not put anyone under pressure as it was born spontaneously.
- When you're about to go out after work or a company meeting, you might say, "I'm going downtown for a drink. Would you like to come?" It is normal to have a drink once the work day is over, so such a proposition will not be strange.
Step 3. Ask him to accompany you
When you need to do something and there is someone you would like to date, invite them to join you. Since you'll do it anyway regardless of her response, it's not a big deal if she doesn't accept. If it's a person you see every day, the options are limitless.
- It's perfect when you are about to go out and want to invite a college colleague to the cinema, propose to a neighbor for a walk or ask a colleague if he wants to play tennis after work.
- Get in the habit of proposing to people to come with you wherever you go. After a while they will get used to your invitations and eventually accept and join you.
