What are you going to do with your life? Observing the infinite range of possibilities and thinking of having to choose only one can paralyze you; in some cases it may seem that there is nothing worth doing. Try this approach: Instead of thinking of your life as an abstract concept that will happen in the future, consider it as something that is happening right now, right now. Stop watching and go for it. Choose something you like, try it and keep doing it until you want to change. In the worst case, you will understand what you don't want to do in life; in the best one, what will come from what and you will discover your purpose along the way.
Steps
Part 1 of 2: Understanding Your Options
Step 1. Think about your interests and dreams
Start by reflecting on what your greatest aspirations and hopes are. Think a few days about where you would like to go. Ask yourself what your ideal life is. Write down any answers that come to your mind. Some will be more achievable than others, but all of them will help you figure out what you want.
- Remember that it is normal not to already know everything we want from the future. Maybe you dream of a certain lifestyle but haven't decided what job to do. Great! You're just jotting down ideas, so don't worry if you don't already have a plan.
- Try using tools on the internet to find out what kind of personality you have and what careers are best for you.
Step 2. Think hard about your life
Consider the choices you face. We can take many paths in life, but not all of them are realistic or convenient, just as not all are rewarding. Think about what you can and cannot do.
- Consider your values. What is important to you? What principles do you want to live by, no matter what you do or where you will be?
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Consider your skills and what you are willing to learn. Are you a good speaker? Do you have a mind bent on mathematics? Do you have excellent dexterity or are you good at analyzing situations? Are you willing to study and do you have the opportunity to do so, in order to orient yourself towards a certain career?
- Consider your financial situation. Do you have any savings? Do your parents pay for everything? Can you afford to take courses, live alone or travel? Many good things in life are free, but money is an invaluable tool for achieving your goals.
- Consider your mobility. Are you willing and able to move to the other side of the planet for a job or an adventure, or are you tied to a specific place? Do you have the money to move in? Do you have obligations (you have to take care of relatives or pets, or do you have a partner) that you don't want to abandon?
Step 3. Think about what is important to you
Do you want to live in a big city or in a certain country? Do you want to have children? Do you want to become famous? Do you want to dedicate your life to a cause or do you just want to be happy? Find out what matters most to you and let yourself be guided by it; however, you must be ready to accept that your priorities may change with time, learning and life experiences.
Step 4. Make a list
Write down 5-10 things you can imagine doing in life, anything that comes to your mind: pilot, firefighter, teacher, writer, forester, carpenter, neurosurgeon or whatever. Review your list and see which professions impress you the most. Separate the realistic options from the fantasies and select 2-3 ideas to explore further, such as firefighter and forester.
- Go through the whole list and consider how realistic each option is. Be honest with yourself and eliminate the rumors you know you will never be able to do.
- If you like the idea of becoming a neurosurgeon, but know you won't have the patience to graduate from medical school and take the postgraduate course, you will probably never become a professional neurosurgeon. Of course this does not mean that you cannot learn about neurosurgery, that you cannot attend lectures or think about that subject in your spare time.
- If you like the idea of being a firefighter and you have what it takes to become one (you are strong and quick, keep calm under pressure, danger does not scare you), do your research and learn more about that profession. Search the internet for "how to become a firefighter". Read on online forums what it really means to do that job. Talk to the firefighters you meet and ask them questions about what they do.
Step 5. Don't just pick one path
You can be a doctor and a poet, a mechanic and a dancer, a teacher and a writer. Try to imagine a combination you like. If you live in human society (i.e. you will not travel the country like a penniless homeless person, you will not be locked up in jail or a mental health center, and you will not live in isolation in a forest enjoying only the fruits of the earth) you will need money. However, this doesn't mean that money has to be your life's only purpose; it is simply a necessary means of maintaining yourself while you do other things.
Step 6. Talk to people
Draw inspiration from those who lead interesting lives, who seem happy and present. Talk to friends, relatives, teachers, strangers you meet on the bus or on the street, people you know on the internet. If you hear about a profession or lifestyle that seems interesting and worth pursuing, consider whether it is worth a try.
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Ask your friends and relatives in what field they see you well. They may not be able to give you all the answers, but they may also have suggestions that can point you in the right direction. You may be surprised at what they will tell you.
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Imagine yourself in someone else's shoes. For example, if you think you want to become a teacher, think about what it means to be a teacher: you will spend most of your time with children and other teachers; you will not become a millionaire, but you will have free summers; you will have to spend evenings and weekends correcting homework and preparing lessons; you will play an important role in preparing the minds of the future. Consider if it is a reality that you like.
Step 7. Probe the terrain
If something sounds interesting to you, take a closer look. Research the professions and lifestyles that you consider realistic possibilities. Remember: you don't have to do the same thing forever.
- Think of choosing a vocation as a series of questions and answers. If you want to learn more about a field, explore it more. If you find that you don't like it, you can use that awareness to move on and try something different.
- Visit the workplace and ask if you can closely follow people's activity. If you think you might be interested in becoming a cop, visit or email the local police department and ask to be able to accompany an officer for a day. If you think you want to become a primary school teacher, contact the institution and ask to attend a teacher's lesson; you can even make it available as a substitute teacher to gain direct experience in the classroom.
- If you can afford it, consider taking free internships or working as a volunteer for a company. Immerse yourself in a company's culture and mindset to see if you like it.
Part 2 of 2: Explore Your Options
Step 1. Throw yourself into something
You can waste all day thinking about tomorrow, but you'll never get anywhere if you don't start taking action. Find a new job, go on an adventure, start taking courses or try a new lifestyle. Put all your energy into something and work until you find another more tempting opportunity. Remember, you can change direction at any time and try something new.
- Reading an endless list of possibilities can paralyze you. As long as you don't prove a thing and make it real, everything will always remain an abstract possibility. You can feel safer in a world where everything is theoretically possible, but in the end you will have to choose something or you will have nothing.
- You don't have to stick to a single job, travel, or lifestyle for the rest of your life. Getting started is important to understand what you can and cannot do from now on. Choose something you like and that feels realistic to you; from one thing another will be born and you will grow as a person.
- You may find that the very action of working towards a goal, even if it's not your biggest dream, gives you a better perspective on what you want to do in life. In the worst case, you will find out what you don't want to do and you can delete an item from the list.
Step 2. Focus on the next few years, not the rest of your life
Don't think about when you are 80: where do you see yourself in a year? In five? The rest of your life will happen whether you like it or not, but you have the power to affect only the present. Trying to plan everything for the next 30, 40, or 60 years can paralyze you, so try to stay focused on the present. Your life will materialize over time.
Step 3. Try volunteering or join an organization that offers services
Consider the Red Cross, Doctors Without Borders, civil protection, volunteering for a non-profit organization or getting certified to teach Italian as a foreign language. These are great ideas if you don't know what to do in the rest of your life, but want to work, grow, and feel productive in the present. Your experience can last a week or a couple of years, it will look good on your resume and help you understand where you belong in the world.
- Enter civil protection. You can participate as a volunteer in this organization that deals with helping and supporting citizens in cases of emergencies or natural disasters.
- Join the Peace Corps. You will spend two years helping to stabilize an at-risk or developing community. You will be able to work all over the world, from Brazil to South Africa, from Vietnam to Ukraine. You can teach Italian as a foreign language, help small businesses grow in a developing economy, or help with food supply in a small rural village. You will work with a community, you will spend your time making the world a better place, and maybe you will understand how to spend the rest of your life.
- Volunteer on an organic farm with WWOOF: World Wide Opportunities on Organic Farms. You will work on an organic farm for a week or maybe forever; in exchange, the farmers give you room and board and teach you their work. For a small fee, you can access a network of thousands of organic farmers looking for help; some need temporary seasonal workers, others are looking for people who are ready to commit for the long term. You can contact a farm that seems interesting to you and start volunteering there within a week.
Step 4. Remember that you can always change paths
The choices you make today will lead you directly to the choices you face in a month, a year, or ten years, but that doesn't mean you have to settle for a job or lifestyle you hate. "Being stuck" is a mindset. At any time, in all situations, you can decide to keep the state of affairs or change everything. The most important thing is to start taking action.