Lies can be a survival tool, or used to play poker. One should never lie to break the law or to endanger oneself or others. A lie can be painful and cause great sorrow. While it is only advisable to lie in rare cases, you can improve this skill with practice and knowing what to avoid.
Steps
Part 1 of 3: Building the Lie
Step 1. Find a reason
You only lie when you have something to come up with to motivate yourself. If you don't go overboard by making up big lies, people won't realize the boundary between what's true and what's false. People who lie all the time, like pathological liars, can't do without them and fill their lives with many little lies at the risk of being discovered. It's hard to remember all the lies you might tell, and people will start not trusting you if you're exposed more than once.
Step 2. Prepare the ground
Think about all the details before telling a lie. As in everything, practice makes perfect. The more times you say it, the easier it will become. It is not difficult to find out if someone is instantly making up a lie, because they are starting to be vague and nervous.
Step 3. Try saying something true, but misleading
The more credible elements you can add, the easier it will be to tell your story. In practice, you should give a false view, instead of shamelessly lying. Make sure others can't ask further questions by sprinkling your story with reliable details.
Step 4. Consider who you are in front of
Try to enter the mind of your interlocutor by listening to your head. A clever liar uses the same tools as a good communicator. So, put yourself in your listener's shoes and imagine what they want to hear. Understand what he knows, and identify his interests and habits to avoid making mistakes that could generate some suspicion during your story.
Step 5. Pay attention to your body language
Lying can make you nervous and frightening. You may not be able to notice if you fidget, stammer, or look away. People can pick up on non-verbal cues, so try to limit unwanted gestures that might clash with your ways.
Some people talk faster than normal or stare straight in the eye, thinking they are overly concealing the fact that they are lying. Test it in front of a mirror or a friend to behave naturally
Step 6. Prepare the emotional context
A liar can memorize the details of his lies, but he may be surprised and unnatural to respond if someone asks him about the emotions he felt in the situation he described. Therefore, be prepared to consider the emotional context related to the details of your lie.
Part 2 of 3: Avoiding Inadequate Movements
Step 1. Relax your lips
By tightening them, you risk transmitting a feeling of regret when you tell a lie. Often people, when reporting a fact, press their lips just before saying something unpleasant. So if someone asks you a series of rather delicate questions, deal with the situation by keeping your lips relaxed.
Step 2. Breathe quietly
If your breathing becomes fast or you even hyperventilate, it means that you are nervous or psychologically uncomfortable. Even a long, deep breath could indicate that you are concentrating on telling a lie.
Step 3. Don't touch your neck
Many people unconsciously touch their necks when they are nervous or anxious, usually reaching the jugular dimple. Many others adjust their ties or play with this accessory instead of touching their necks directly.
Step 4. Align the body according to the position of the interlocutor
If the topic of the conversation becomes controversial or the discussion becomes complicated, you will almost certainly tend to lean away from whoever is in front of you. For example, you might move your chair slightly and turn your torso away from the accusing person or the person you are lying to. You may even create a barrier by crossing your legs while still looking in the eye. Therefore, keep your torso facing your interlocutor, especially if he has just asked you a question that you are forced to answer with a lie.
Step 5. Keep your hands away from your eyes
When a person is faced with a rather difficult argument, they may grab their glasses or rub their eyes. To avoid any suspicions, keep your hands in a natural position as you tell a lie.
Step 6. Keep your thumbs out
By hiding or dropping your thumbs, you may show insecurity or little involvement in what you are saying. When people are truly involved and interested in a speech, they tend to keep their thumbs straight and apart.
Step 7. Try to be spontaneous as you speak
Any changes in voice timbre and behavior can raise suspicions. Some people may speak faster, in a higher pitched tone, or fool with words when they are nervous. The intention of the liar is to convince his interlocutor that what he is saying is true, therefore he can insist on various details, always reiterating the same concepts. So avoid repeating the same information if you want to express yourself naturally.
- A liar can test the ground by repeating the same concepts and resorting to arguments that are weaker at the beginning and end of his speech, in an attempt to study the interlocutor and see if he has believed his lie.
- It's not easy to tell if someone is lying to you when they repeat the same information over and over, especially over the phone, because the phone itself can fuel confusion and force the speaker to repeat themselves.
Step 8. Analyze the duration of the breaks
Cultural context can affect the use of pauses in verbal communication. However, interrupting your speech may give the impression that you are rearranging your ideas to make a lie. For example, by saying, "This is a great question," others may think that you are taking the time to collect your thoughts and come up with some lies.
Both sincere and fake people pause occasionally while talking, so pausing is a difficult factor to interpret without proper context
Part 3 of 3: Keep Lying
Step 1. Keep your version
Be consistent. Depending on the gravity of the lie, it is not that easy to maintain a certain linearity when lying. Remember every detail you have told, even if you are not asked. Make sure you don't give different information to different people.
Step 2. Stay focused
You have to believe the lies you tell. Any hesitation will make it clear that you are lying. It is not so pleasant to consciously alter the truth, because fear and guilt creep into the soul. By using body language and facial expressions, you risk betraying your true emotions when you can't wait to finish a lying tale. Therefore, you must act as if you are telling the truth.
Some people feel a thrill of pleasure when they lie, without showing shame or remorse. From a social point of view, this is not a widely accepted gesture, so it is understandable if you do not enjoy the idea of what you are doing and have a hard time pretending
Step 3. Increase the pressure
If you are accused of lying, turn the tables and manipulate the attacker. You might ask him, "Why were you there? Don't you trust me?" Or, "I'm sure you don't want to let your friends know what you're up to."
Step 4. Distract others from the main issue
Politicians use this technique to divert people's attention and bring it to other topics. People have a hard time blaming others, so they easily accept the possibility of changing the subject. For example, if a politician is asked what his views on economic problems are, he could orient the discourse on the issue of immigration. Likewise, if you are accused of not getting home on time, bring the talk to your brother driving without a license.
Step 5. Negotiate with your opponent
Shake off any responsibility that may come from your lies by finding extenuating or even debunking the accusations you have received through an admission that meets the expectations of the accusers. If you can unload the blame, you will also be able to allay the anger that comes with it.
Step 6. Remember all the nuances
People can question you in various ways to find out a lie. Therefore, be sure to remember not only the details, but also the most irrelevant details when asked more specific questions.
Advice
- To be good at lying you have to believe in the lie you are telling.
- Do not dwell on it: the more verbose you are, the more details you will be forced to remember.
Warnings
- Lies can be dangerous and painful and even get you into trouble if you get caught.
- Don't lie to break the law or to endanger yourself or others.
