Talking to girls can be scary if you don't have a lot of experience behind you. If there is a girl in your class that you particularly like, or one you find interesting and with whom you would like to make friends, do not feel too nervous about starting to talk to her. This article will explain how to break the ice by talking about the lessons, getting to know her and developing a good relationship, whether you want to be a simple friend to her or something more.
Steps
Method 1 of 3: Breaking the Ice
Step 1. Ask her for a small favor
The easiest way to start a conversation with someone you're not familiar with is to ask for a favor. You don't know that person, so you don't know yet what you have in common. Asking a favor is a neutral way to start communicating, without boring the other person with something he has no interest in.
- Make sure you ask for a non-binding favor, which does not represent a burden for the other person.
- For example, ask her to lend you a pen or read her notes to check if you missed something.
- If you don't have the textbook with you, ask her if you can read with her. In this way, you can also sit close together!
Step 2. Ask her a question about something the teacher said
Since you don't know her very well yet, you may not have a clue what she likes. The only thing you certainly have in common is that you are in the same class. Even if you understand the lesson perfectly, ask her for clarification on what the teacher said.
- Unlike a favor, which can lead to a very short interaction, asking someone to explain something to you will probably lead to a longer conversation.
- Keep the conversation going by asking her more questions.
- If she didn't understand and can't answer you either, show her your solidarity! Let her know that you are in the same boat and that you have something in common.
Step 3. Make her laugh
Girls love guys with a good sense of humor, so try to make her laugh. Look her in the eye when someone says something funny, or snort when the teacher assigns you homework. However, make sure not to disturb the lessons and not to attract the attention of the teacher. If you get into trouble, you will certainly not be impressed!
Step 4. Ask for their opinion on something related to the lessons
You're trying to get to know her, so make her feel that you care what she has to say. Ask her about the lessons, such as what she thinks the next test will be about, or how many hours she thinks it will take to prepare a research.
Don't interrupt her when she gives her opinion. Let her talk for as long as she wants and show interest in what she has to say
Step 5. Compliment her
Complimenting is more complicated than it sounds. You might think "who doesn't like getting a compliment?", But remember that you should always be respectful of the person you are talking to. Always and only praising a girl's beauty might make her think that you only care about her physical appearance, which most women don't like. Compliment her on something she's committed to doing, whether it's related to her physical appearance or not, and not the qualities she was born with.
- Compliment her on a particular hairstyle, not her eyes.
- Compliment her on how she is dressed.
- Tell her you liked the way she answered a question during the lesson.
- Compliment her on a good grade she got.
Step 6. Choose the right time to break the ice
Don't bother her with questions or favors if you see her focused or if she's late. If you are in class together, a lot, you will see her every day; choose a time when she seems relaxed and in a good mood to start talking to her.
Method 2 of 3: Getting to know each other
Step 1. Try to talk about something that is not related to the school
Since you will have at least the lessons in common, they will be a great topic to get to know each other with: you can talk about homework, teachers, your classmates, etc. Over time, however, you should also try to talk about other aspects of your life and topics that have nothing to do with classes and school.
Step 2. Maintain a friendly approach
Don't try too hard trying to impress. What might seem like a fascinating attitude to you could be perceived by another person as distant or haughty behavior. It is much easier for a girl to talk to a guy who is just himself, open and honest.
- Smile and laugh easily, girls love guys who know how to have fun.
- Turn to her when you talk to her.
- Don't be afraid to look her in the eye.
Step 3. Try to find out what interests you
When you have broken the ice, try to deepen your knowledge. Try to find out what interests her. Ask her what her favorite subject is, if she does any after-school activities and what she likes to do in her spare time.
- Try to direct the conversation towards topics that interest her.
- This will make her want to talk to you more, as she will understand that you like to hear her talk about something she likes.
Step 4. Share your interests with her
You want her to get to know you too, so talk to her about what's important to you. If you let her talk about herself all the time, after a while you may stop liking her, because you may have the impression that your friendship is all focused on her. It is important to maintain a balance, so that both of you can share parts of your life with each other equally.
- Be open and honest. Don't just talk about what you think she might like, talk about what's really important to you.
- Use your discretion. There are some things you shouldn't talk about with someone you don't know well yet, so remember to start with innocent, light-hearted topics.
- Try to keep a balance between how much you will talk and how much she will talk.
Step 5. Get to know his friends
The best way to spend time with someone is to have mutual friends. Spending time with a group of friends will be less challenging than talking on your own, you will feel more relaxed and comfortable, and will likely like you more. A person's friends are important, so you will tend to like him more if he sees you getting along with his friendships.
- Talk to her friends even when she is not around. You don't want them to think you're just using them to get to her.
- Try to forge a true friendship with them. If you like a girl, you will probably also like the people she surrounds herself with.
Method 3 of 3: Develop a Good Relationship
Step 1. Plan future conversations
The best way to make sure you still talk to her is to plan when to do it! When you are able to talk to her, for example in the lunch break, try to tell her that there is something you absolutely want to tell her, but that you prefer to do it next time.
- For example, try saying “Remind me to tell you what the math teacher said last week! It was too much fun!"
- Greet her by saying that you will meet again on a certain occasion, for example "See you tomorrow" or "See you at the table".
- Ask her if she plans to participate in any school or extracurricular event: “Are you going to Laura's party too this Saturday? I can bring you back the notes you lent me”.
Step 2. Talk to her outside of class
Sit next to her in the canteen or talk to her between lessons, whether she stays in the classroom or waits in the corridor. The more you talk to her outside of class, the more she'll start to see you as a friend and not just a classmate.
Step 3. Don't be too impatient
You want to show her your interest, don't make her think you're a stalker! Don't worry and don't be seen at every corner. Try to get into the habit of talking to her at about the same time every day, for example between lessons, at lunch, or before or after school. In this way you will be sure you can see her every day and you will not have the impression of having to chase her around.
From time to time, you may not even talk to her for a day or two. Give her some time to miss your chats, so that she wants your company even more
Step 4. Ask for her phone number
When you start talking to each other outside of school, you will surely be more than just classmates. A simple and neutral way to ask her for her phone number is to say you need it in case you have any doubts about your homework.
- Remember, in the beginning, to use her phone number to ask her questions about the school, so as not to make her think that you have deceived her.
- Text her instead of calling her. You won't feel nervous about talking to her verbally and you won't put too much pressure on her.
- After sending her a couple of homework and delivery messages, start texting her every now and then about other topics, such as complaining about annoying things your parents can say or telling her something funny you saw at the mall.
Step 5. Ask her to hang out with you outside of school
Depending on your age, however, remember that your parents may not allow you to go out alone with a girl, so it might be best to invite her out with a group of mutual friends. If she's not in your group of friends, ask her to invite some of her friends over. Make sure he feels comfortable accepting your invitation.
- Choose a public place, such as a shopping mall or movie theater.
- Offer her food, such as pizza or a hamburger.
- Make sure you pay attention to her and talk to her, even if there are other people around.
Advice
- Always smile.
- If she tells you "no", you can always ask her to remain friends.
- If she snubs or doesn't pay attention to you, don't automatically assume she's not interested. He may simply be afraid of getting in trouble by letting himself be caught while chatting. Try talking to her when the teacher is busy or after class, when you are doing the satchel.
- If she doesn't want to talk, leave her alone.
- Don't "try" to act cool.
