Breaking the ice is essential in a variety of situations, and succeeding in doing so will lead to more productive conversations and make you feel more comfortable in them. No matter what situation you are in, wikiHow has some tips ready for you! Start reading from step 1 or consult the sections below to find out how to behave depending on the situation.
Steps
Method 1 of 3: In a Sentimental Relationship
Step 1. Admit you are nervous
Going out on a date is not like meeting people in other situations… There is a whole host of things that only make you extremely nervous! Admitting that you're nervous on a first date or even just when you're with someone you just met can be a good way to break the ice. The other person is probably just as nervous as you are, so expressing what you both feel can really ease the tension.
Step 2. Try to pay attention and comment on something you noticed in the other person
Look at her, take a good look at her and pay attention to what she wears or her attitude. Pay attention to how he speaks. In his accent. See if she's wearing something special, unique or that looks like something handmade. At this point, comment on what impressed you.
Step 3. Get her to ask you something
By letting the other person know that they can safely talk to you and ask you questions, you can help them break the ice. Say something like, "If there's something you want to ask me, go ahead." You can also direct it to some specific topic. For example: "If you want to ask me about my wooden leg, go ahead. I have no problem talking about it."
Step 4. Be direct
When it comes to matters of the heart, you must always say what you think. If you spot someone you'd like to get to know better, perhaps on a date, approach them and tell them. Some people will not appreciate your bluntness, but for most of them, especially the more attractive ones, it will be a breath of fresh air compared to the usual approaches. Say something like, "Sorry, but when I saw you I felt like I was sucking the air out of my lungs. I had to introduce myself, otherwise I could never forgive myself."
Step 5. Make comments about his name
If she has a relatively unusual name (perhaps one that was popular many years ago, one of a certain ethnicity, or any other name that is not the usual Anna / Francesco), ask her about it. You might ask if the name comes from someone else's, why her parents chose that, if she likes her name, etc.
Step 6. Say you are placing a bet
One of the stealthiest and most effective ways to break the ice with someone you don't know is to say that you are making a bet with someone. For example, you might say something like, "My friend says my shirt makes me look like Brad Pitt. What do you think?" or: "All my friends say that guys don't like girls with short hair. What do you think?"
Method 2 of 3: At work
Step 1. Get informed
Always inform yourself before business meetings and meetings, whether there is only one other person or whether there are three hundred. Learn about the company and as many executives as you can. Did your new colleague work in another industry before? Did the company you visit just announce that there will be a corporate reorganization soon? Try to get news of this type, because you can use the information found to start a conversation.
Step 2. Ask other people how they got into that industry
A good way to start a conversation with someone you meet at work is to ask how they got to where they are. Most people will have gone through a rather complicated career path to get to where they are now, so the conversation might even turn out to be really interesting!
Step 3. Ask questions about an award or distinction the company recently earned
It's the kind of thing you can find out by inquiring about the company as suggested above. Just make sure it's a fairly recent award so you can talk about it even with someone who hasn't been in that company for a long time.
Step 4. Distribute Smarties around
To break the ice with large enough groups of people, have them pass each other a bowl of Smarties or other colorful candy. At that point, ask someone who just grabbed a treat a question. Tie the question type to the color of the Smarties. For example, whoever took a blue one will be asked: "Where did you grow up?"; a green one could be: "What's your favorite TV show?"
Step 5. Refresh your knowledge of sports and popular culture
If those aren't topics that interest you, it might be a burden to you, but popular culture is known to be (by definition) the common denominator among very large groups of people. Quickly read the entertainment and sports sections in the newspapers or on the internet, and you'll be prepared to strike up a conversation with many more people.
Step 6. Treat your employees, colleagues and anyone you meet like adults
Many ways of breaking the ice in the workplace revolve around playing games. Most of the time, there will be someone who likes these games, but most people will feel like they are back in high school (because certain games are common at school). Avoid humiliating your employees or the people you work with by making them feel this. Look for adult solutions to break the ice. Which usually involves putting the embarrassments aside and starting a conversation yourself!
Method 3 of 3: In General Situations
Step 1. Compliment the other person
A sincere compliment is always a good way to start things off with a new friend. Find something you like or admire, and express what you think. Don't hold back! You can compliment the project the other person is working on, their personality, style, or whatever else comes to mind.
But keep in mind that complimenting her on a specific body part may not be a good idea
Step 2. Play a little silly
Acting a little silly can help someone who is not comfortable relax a little by letting them see that there is nothing to be afraid of. Use this approach if you know that people tend to see you as too serious and scary. Do something silly, such as reading their horoscope in a slightly childish voice once you know their zodiac sign.
Step 3. Be the new guy
Admit you're new or don't go out much, and ask for recommendations about the area, things to do, or the best places to eat. Asking people to talk about something they love is usually the quickest way to get them comfortable and talk a lot.
Step 4. Pay attention to your surroundings
By doing so, you will very easily find something to direct your comments towards. Changes in a building under construction, a passer-by doing something nice for a stranger, an upcoming event, and so on are all great ways to start talking to someone you've just met.
Step 5. Ask for a favor
This is a technique that should be used in moderation, but it can be a good way to start a conversation with someone. Ask the other person to do you a small favor (like holding your glass, keeping your seat in line, grabbing something you can't reach, giving you directions, etc.). Just make sure what you ask only takes about 30 seconds of their time. When they have finished helping you, thank them and start talking about this and that.
Step 6. Ask the other person what they are eating or drinking
If you want to start a conversation with someone at a restaurant, bar, or any other place where they serve food, ask them about the drink they are holding or the food they are eating. Say something about the good smell of his dish and ask him where he got it or what it is. At that point you can divert the conversation by talking about the food of that area or about some ingredient present in the dish in question, and so on.
Advice
- Try to be friendly!
- Take risks. Don't leave thinking you will be rejected.
- Talk to your family members to practice.
