Ahh, the women. It is amazing how this one word can arouse so much fear and anxiety in some men, as if they had just witnessed a murder. But things don't have to go that way at all. While for some men, being successful with women and all that comes with it seems impossible, in reality, by implementing the right strategies, it is much easier than it may seem.
Steps
Step 1. Take care of your personal hygiene
On the surface it is trivial, but it's amazing that many guys don't take it seriously. You don't have to be the sexiest man on the planet, but it's essential that you don't smell or look like a garbage can. Wear freshly laundered clothes, shower every day, spray deodorant in the morning, brush your teeth, make sure your hair is in place, etc. It sounds silly, but these little actions really make a difference with women. And some guys don't seem to understand it.
Step 2. Cultivate deep self-confidence
No, we're not telling you that you should brag about every single thing you do and act like the most charming person the world has ever had the pleasure of welcoming - this attitude won't get you far. You have to have confidence in yourself, don't look like a wimp when you talk to women. Believe it or not, girls know from their looks, posture and approach to flirting if a man is insecure and scared of what they will think. Women want a strong man, not a lump who barely has the guts to get close. If they see someone who is sure of themselves, they perceive the qualities they are looking for in him, and they will therefore be much more open to getting to know him.
Step 3. Start talking to her
Many guys have no idea how to approach a girl, even though that's one of the easiest aspects of the whole process.
- Don't go straight to her, with your hands at your sides, saying, "Hi, my name is …". Despite being seen on television or in the cinema, it hardly works. And the reasons are various; mostly, it's extremely unnatural and leaves very little room for conversation once it really starts. Plus, it reeks of insecurity and inexperience, two things women don't want in guys. But don't worry, here's a working approach! Let's assume she is leaning against a wall, busy texting. Calmly approach and lean against the wall too, about a meter away. Don't pay attention to her yet, act like you haven't even noticed her. She will notice your presence, but she won't say anything, because she expects you to take the first step or maybe she doesn't care. In any case, wait for about 30 seconds before making an observation inspired by the context in which you find yourself.
- There are three possible reactions. One: he will respond to you and the conversation will flow naturally and quickly. Obviously this is the preferable option. Two: he could answer just to do so by saying "Yes, of course". Three: If she's shy, she may react as if she didn't hear you (even if she isn't). In these last two cases, he uses a powerful technique based on a mix of cheekiness and sympathy, which will be discussed later. Whatever situation arises, keep calm and self-confident. If your eyes seem like a sucker, he will hardly change his mind about you, even if you start dating.
Step 4. Body language
The most powerful weapon ever in your sentimental arsenal. A conversation means practically nothing when compared to what the body can say. And it is your gestures and posture that will attract her to you, that will convince her to go out with you and that will seduce her. Keep in mind that this step is only applicable if option One from the previous section occurs. The technique based on the mix of boldness and sympathy is instead adaptable to the other two scenarios. Back to us. You pointed to something in your place, the girl answered you and now you are chatting. Congratulations! But, wait, get your feet back on the ground! You won't get far with her without proper body language. Don't worry: once you know what it is, it becomes easy. The goal is simple: to communicate with this girl and convey a certain message to her without saying a word. Okay, you may be thinking, “What?”, But it's really a no-brainer.
- Eye contact is crucial to communicating with the body (and, in case you haven't noticed, it also boils down to the confidence factor in yourself). While talking to this girl, make eye contact throughout the time you spend together. This doesn't mean staring at her creepily, or you will scare her, it means focusing on her gaze while chatting. It wouldn't seem like it, but it's actually extremely intimate beneath the surface, and when combined with other aspects of body language, it will do wonders for her to lose her mind for you.
- And so now you are talking and looking deeply into your eyes. Somehow, you have already embarked on an intimate journey, and she knows it. Now it's a matter of instinct. If she smiles and tilts her head at an angle (well, she's flirting), this clearly indicates that she is attracted to you. At this point, you can advance by communicating with the body. If he's not already flirting with you, then he's waiting for you to make the first move. Give her what she wants. As you speak, come closer and start touching her gently in different areas, such as on her arms, hands or waist. In the meantime, keep looking her in the eye, otherwise the situation could get weird, resulting in everything you've built down. You can also wrap your arm around her, at which point she'll probably let you. As you speak, hint short smiles and send her clues to let her know you like her, without saying it directly for now. Now that you have established greater intimacy by breaking the barrier of physical contact and insinuating your attraction, you can be almost totally certain that you have won it. Try kissing her. If you don't know how to do it, read this article so you won't be caught off guard. Depending on the type of girl, you might go further. You can also just ask her for the phone number, but she might be disappointed because maybe she aspired to something else.
Step 5. Technique based on a mix of boldness and sympathy
If you find yourself a girl who is unwilling to make conversation, this technique is essential to get her attention and make her lose her mind for you. So, the technique works as follows. You made a comment about where you are, trying to get her to talk, but all you managed to get from her was a "Yes, sure".
- This technique is essentially an integration of two characteristics that usually do not go into consideration alone: arrogance and cheap humor. If you're arrogant, she won't even want to see you in the picture. If your sense of humor doesn't make anyone laugh, they'll think you're a clown and won't take you seriously. But, when you combine these two factors, the union will attract this girl's attention. You probably hear often that Nice Guys can't get along with women and that the not-so-cute ones conquer them all. You may have even witnessed such a situation firsthand. But kind guys don't have this technique and those who make women suffer use it in a different way. So it's a very effective technique that can make a difference when trying to attract a girl.
- Perfect, then, now that you know what the technique is, here's how to use it. You have to take what the girl says (or don't say) and create a response that is somewhat arrogant, mischievous and funny, but not misinterpreted. The key is to keep a good balance between these characteristics: if he's too arrogant, he'll think you're an idiot; if she's too funny, she'll think you're an idiot. Also, you should use your body language to let her know that you don't really mean what you say, that you are just kidding. For example, crack a smile as you look into her eyes after you say it, so she won't take it completely seriously and you won't make a fool of yourself.
- Example: If you approached a girl with a comment about the weather and she replies “Yes, of course”, snobbishly, you say, “Oh, I see, this young lady feels too important to talk to me. They should really crown her queen, she is so special…”. She will likely look at you as you say this, and this is a good time to look back and smile at her slightly after you finish the sentence. Maybe she's saying something too. You respond with your "cheeky-fun" attitude until you really start having a conversation. This strategy is very simple and works wonders. Once you get good at it, you can edit your comment to fit whatever she says, even if she doesn't have to say anything ("Oh, you must be one of those silent girls. Honestly, they've always seemed pretty weird to me"). The point is to find a balance between arrogance and humor, making it clear that you are only joking. Of course, you will need practice to do this.
