Do you have a crush and want to ask the person you like to go out with you? Make sure you know her better before making your proposal and that she is at least partially interested in you. Use all your charisma, courage and remember you can do it!
Steps
Part 1 of 3: Getting to know her
Step 1. Talk to the person you have a crush on
It will be much easier to ask her out with you if you know each other and she will also be more likely to say yes. Start with a simple conversation by saying "Hi" to her and introducing yourself.
- If you are in class together, ask her for advice on homework or a difficult topic. If you are part of the same group, talk to her about the business you have in common.
- Ask her to tell you about herself. Ask her how her day is going or what plans she has for the weekend. It's easy!
Step 2. Become his friend
You don't have to be best friends or tell each other all your secrets. However, friendship involves a certain level of trust, and having a good relationship allows the other person to get an idea about you. Try accompanying her to class or attending her in group situations. If you're compatible, she might have a crush on you too!
Step 3. Be sincere and authentic
Don't try to make the person you like believe that you are different from reality. Deluding her isn't a long-term sustainable way to get her to go out with you. If you lie, the truth will eventually come out. If you try to make a good impression or imitate someone you think is more charismatic than you, you may just be making the other person uncomfortable. Don't waste your time with the mise-en-scène.
If you are yourself and do the things you enjoy, your passion will emerge and many people will find you attractive
Step 4. Try to be as direct as possible
If you want his phone number, ask him; do not look for it somewhere and do not turn to a mutual friend. If you want to know what she did over the weekend, don't follow her on Facebook, but ask. Following her everywhere and putting her on a pedestal is not the right way to start a healthy relationship.
Part 2 of 3: Setting the Scene
Step 1. Do it in person
If you have no alternative, ask her to go out on the phone or with a video call; avoid messages. It is much easier to communicate with someone via text, especially who you like, but you will find that asking someone to go out face to face is much more romantic. If you prefer a casual, no-obligation approach, go ahead and use texting, but don't expect to make a good impression.
Step 2. Try to be natural
Find a time when you and the person you like aren't busy. She shouldn't be stressed or in a rush. If possible, find a place where you feel comfortable and where you usually meet. Try to create the most natural and spontaneous moment possible.
Step 3. Approach the person you like when they are alone
The conversation becomes easier for both of you if you don't ask her out in front of other people. Many have trouble talking about their feelings in private and even more so when the focus is on them. If you don't normally find yourself alone with the person you like, you need to create the opportunity. It's much easier to be alone with a friend or at least with someone you've talked to a few times before.
- Ask her to take a walk with you: from school to home, between classes or to the park. Ask her to go out with you for a minute. You can say "Can I talk to you privately for a minute?" or "Would you like to take me to class?".
- Especially avoid asking a person out in front of their friends! He may feel embarrassed and probably prefers not to talk about his feelings in front of many people. You may get rejected just because you made her uncomfortable.
Step 4. Start by talking about the plus and minus
The best strategy is to ask the person you like to go out with you when you are already talking to yourself. You don't have to jump right away to the big question. Set the mood by asking the other person how their day was, making a joke and listening to what they have to say. You both should feel comfortable.
Step 5. Wait for the right time
Even the best plans run into obstacles. You may want to try walking the person you like home after school when another couple of friends decide to join. You need to be patient. You can always ask her out tomorrow, while it is not easy to remedy an embarrassing moment that you provoked in a hurry. Look for an occasion when everything is perfect.
Part 3 of 3: Ask her out
Step 1. Bring out the courage
It's really hard to admit your feelings to someone you really like. You may be in a cold sweat, feel nervous, shake and be terrified; however, you will feel much better when you have lifted this burden. Ask yourself if you would regret not saying anything and if the answer is yes, ask her out.
- Think about having to jump into cold water. You can spend all day looking at the water, feeling it with your toes and thinking about how cold it will be. Or, you can stop lingering and throw yourself; at that point you will just have to worry about swimming, getting used to the cold or getting out of the water.
- If you can't make it, find an incentive. Think "I have to ask her out before Friday, otherwise I won't be able to attend the party on Friday night." Find a reason to stop hesitating and take action.
Step 2. Be direct and sincere
Avoid games and tell the person that you have a crush on them. The idea may scare you, but this approach makes your life a lot easier. You can say, "Hey, I want to be clear. I like you a lot and I would like to spend more time with you. What do you think?".
Step 3. Ask the person you have a crush on to do a specific activity together
Don't ask her generically to "go out". Don't tell her to be your girlfriend if you haven't even dated yet. Suggest something fun and inexpensive that both of you will enjoy: a movie, a hike, a concert, or a school event. If you ask her to go somewhere alone, she'll probably know it's a date; for the moment, however, avoid asking her to become your "girlfriend".
If the prom is coming up, ask the person you have a crush on to accompany you. This is a great opportunity to let her know how you feel about her. Remember that if you haven't explicitly agreed differently, going to prom together doesn't mean you're "dating"
Step 4. Don't be in a hurry
Ask the person you like to hang out with you and don't think too much further. If you're already dating and want to ask her to make your relationship exclusive, that's a different conversation. If you only have a crush for the moment, don't put too much pressure on the appointment and proceed leisurely.
Step 5. Respect a "no"
If you ask the person you have a crush on to date you and they refuse, you need to respect their response. There is a difference between being pushy when you really like someone and stalking, annoying, or uncomfortable. There are other fish in the sea. Behave yourself!
Advice
- There is always the possibility that your proposal will be rejected. It's a risk, but life is full of risks.
- Don't keep asking someone out after they declined your first invitation. Respect his opinion and turn the page.
- Be yourself. If you're not spontaneous, you may feel like you're a different person every day. With this attitude, you may seem false.
- Try not to be creepy with the person you like. He'd think you're weird.
- When you ask the person you like to go out with you, try to make them comfortable. Let her know that you care about her.
- Remember, there are many other people who will be happy to be with you.
- It's hard to ask someone you have a crush on to go out, but if you want to ask them to go to prom with you, you need even more advice.
- If you get rejected, it's possible the other person likes you, but they can't say yes for some reason. Her parents may be preventing her from having an affair, she may think she is ruining your friendship, or she may be shy. If you suspect one of these reasons is behind the rejection, try to find out which one, but always respect a no.
