As many single women know, finding a husband can be a difficult undertaking. However, you will be much more likely to achieve marital bliss if you search for the type of man that suits you in the right way and in the right places.
Steps
Part 1 of 4: Knowing Where to Look
Step 1. Look in the right places
Instead of purposely searching the places frequented by single men, do what you like in the places where you want to spend your time. It will be easier to find interesting guys who share the same interests as you if you don't stop pursuing them.
- Of course, you have to be smart and, therefore, you will have to consider hobbies that might give you more opportunities for dating. Traditionally, women's activities offer fewer opportunities to attract men. For example, chances are you won't come across many while attending a crochet or knitting course, while the choice may be wider if you decide to join a hiking association.
- Keep in mind that where you meet a guy usually reflects his personality as well. Often men who meet at bars and nightclubs are not looking for serious relationships nor are they "people to marry".
Step 2. Consider dating sites
If you haven't been very successful dating men in real life, turn to the virtual world. Dating sites enjoy a bad reputation in some social circles, but when used wisely, they can be a very useful tool for meeting new people.
- Give preference to sites that have a high success rate for weddings. Usually, these are portals that require users to pay for membership and fill in questionnaires about their personality. If marriage is your ultimate goal, you should avoid most free online dating sites and those aimed primarily at casual relationships.
- Be careful when you see men you know in person on a dating site. Always make an appointment in a public place and let a friend know where and who you will be with.
Step 3. Look around
Let family and friends know that you are ready to build a serious relationship and ask them if they know any single men who might be interested.
While the idea of setting up a blind date may seem unattractive, you could increase your chances of success if you ask the right people to introduce you to someone. Rely on the help of your loved ones, as they know your character well, instead of involving people with whom you do not have deep relationships in your love life
Step 4. Spend some time alone
By involving your friends in this quest, you may feel less nervous, but the odds of success can also drop. A man is more likely to approach a woman when she is alone, so you should spend a few moments on your own from time to time.
If you happen to meet a potential partner while out and about with your friends, break away from the group to give them the opportunity to get closer to you, or try to take the initiative with them
Step 5. Keep your eyes peeled
You may run into the right person on a daily basis without even realizing it. Open your mind to the opportunities that arise in everyday life, when you are at work, going out on errands or enjoying your free time.
However, be cautious. A love story that does not go the right way can complicate relationships with colleagues and friends, so at the beginning, before trying to establish a romantic relationship, it is preferable to know a man without getting involved from the sexual point of view
Part 2 of 4: Narrowing the Field of Your Choice
Step 1. Consider the various options
As long as you're not in a real relationship, you have the freedom to hang out with whoever you want. If there are multiple men who are interested in you, try to get to know them all a little before you get to pick one.
Be honest with the people you are dating. If a man wants to establish an exclusive relationship with you, but you're still unsure of your choice, don't pretend to share his intentions while dating other guys
Step 2. Be selective, but don't be difficult
If you want to discard the wrong men, you need to set criteria, but also know the difference between reasonable expectations and unreasonable demands.
Generally, a healthy choice criterion is based on demonstrating strong values and character traits. Conversely, if you follow an unrealistic ideal, you run the risk of making bad decisions. Of course, you can't expect a man to be perfect, but you can and should expect your partner to be a sincere and respectful person
Step 3. See if there is mutual attraction
If on the one hand you must not let yourself be influenced too much by the physical appearance, on the other hand the physical attraction is still an important component in the knowledge of man. If you aren't physically attracted to a guy, you probably won't want to establish any kind of physical intimacy with him, but know that over time such a lack could hinder your happiness.
Likewise, the guy you hang out with must feel attracted to you too. The physical component can only nurture your relationship if the attraction between you is mutual
Step 4. Evaluate whether a different feeling might arise between your friendships
Instead of looking for love in men who want to get to know you, first try to deepen your male friendships. In fact, friendship constitutes a more solid basis for building a lasting relationship than attraction.
- Even if you are both interested in the possibility of a romantic relationship, you have the option of expressing your interest without immediately taking action.
- When you start dating a man, you should continue to nurture your friendship while encouraging more romantic expectations within your relationship.
Step 5. Invest in the right person
Once you have found the right person, you will need to make them understand what your feelings and intentions are. Tell her that you intend to build an exclusive and lasting relationship, open to the possibility of marriage.
- If he doesn't want to get married or doesn't share your desire for a lasting relationship, it's probably best to let him go and move on. Knowing his intentions will save you time and a lot of suffering in the future.
- Once you are committed to a man, you will also need to cut ties with everyone else you were dating.
Part 3 of 4: Identifying the Person to Marry
Step 1. Evaluate instead of testing it
To determine if a man is a potential husband, you should honestly evaluate him instead of testing him. By observing it in your daily life, you will have a more accurate picture.
Furthermore, by deliberately "testing" the feelings he has towards you or setting some traps for him, you risk basing your relationship on treachery and lack of sincerity. This behavior could lead him to believe that you are not suitable for marriage, unlike him
Step 2. Observe the way he treats others
During the early stages of a relationship, a man may treat you too well in an attempt to impress you. It will certainly be pleasant, but a special treatment does not last indefinitely nor does it allow you to understand what value it gives to other people. To better assess this, pay attention to how he interacts with others.
- It is very likely that the first clues come from strangers and acquaintances. For example, if he is rude to a restaurant waiter or gets easily nervous in front of a somewhat clumsy cashier, he may not have much respect for people in general.
- The most significant clues come from how he treats family and friends. The way he behaves around people in his affections will likely be similar to the way he would treat you if he became your husband.
Step 3. Observe him in stressful situations
Married life inevitably includes conflict and tension, so it's important to evaluate your ability to handle the more unpleasant aspects of life.
Daily life is a constant strain, so if you stay with him often, you won't have to wait long before you run into a stressful situation. Think, for example, of traffic jams, endless queues, wrong restaurant orders and hectic days at work
Step 4. Consider its economic stability
Even if you intend to continue working after marriage, you should look for a financially responsible man. You probably won't need to support yourself, but you should still avoid someone who could ruin your life.
Pay particular attention to his professional situation and his ability to manage money. Orient yourself to a man who has a stable job, but if he is currently unemployed, try to find out why. Make sure they don't have a habit of getting into debt or spending money unwise
Step 5. Look for commonalities
It is not that between spouses each must be an exact copy of the other, but it will be much easier to make a marriage work if you get along at least on the essential aspects of life.
- The most important aspects include, for example, the scale of values and plans for the future. Basically, you should share the same ideas about what matters most and the direction your life should take.
- Even if it is not strictly essential, it would also be useful to share some interests, since in this way it will be easier to spend moments together and continue to nurture the relationship.
Step 6. Seek a second opinion
Ask trusted friends and family what they think about the person you are dating. It's easy to go blind to the mistakes of the man you're infatuated with, so an outside opinion may confirm or correct your perception of him.
Also ask people close to you for their opinion on your relationship in general. Even if they express a positive opinion about the man you are dating, they may notice some difficulties in your current relationship. Solve problems early on instead of letting them get worse
Step 7. Be sure of your choice
Ask yourself if you actually intend to become his wife and answer honestly. Even if he wants to marry you, you shouldn't make a hasty decision unless the impatience is mutual.
If you're not sure how you feel about him, consider the situation carefully. Try to identify the reasons that lead you to hesitate and determine if those reasons are due to what you think of this man or your insecurities, then address each problem in the appropriate way
Part 4 of 4: Staying Stable
Step 1. Stay true to yourself
It may sound trite, but this sentence is full of wisdom. If you interact with a man while wearing a mask, you will feel the stress of having to wear it throughout your relationship. Since you are aiming for marriage, you will be forced to hide who you really are for the rest of your life.
Certainly at the beginning, when you are looking for a potential partner, you will have to make a good impression. Start putting out your best qualities rather than pretending to have characteristics you don't actually have
Step 2. Be aware of your worth
You have to have faith in yourself. Each person has his flaws, but no one is completely devoid of merits. Knowing your value is the simplest and surest way to encourage others to do the same.
Many women find it difficult to accept their physical image, underestimating how connected it is to self-esteem. Instead of complaining about being imperfect in certain areas of your body, try focusing on the physical characteristics you like. By highlighting them, you will feel more confident about your appearance in general, and once you have gained more self-confidence, you will be able to grab the attention of potential partners
Step 3. Improve your persona for yourself
Everyone has their flaws. Therefore, it can be beneficial to be aware of your problems. Instead of changing your personality in hopes of making the right man fall in love, you should make some changes in order to improve your life.
If you change for yourself, you will be happier beyond any romantic relationship. You will be more and more satisfied with yourself and your life, regardless of whether you are single or married
Step 4. Pray so that you can orient yourself
If you believe in God or a higher power, spend some of your time praying for your future married life. Ask for guidance when searching for a mate and during intercourse with your future husband.
