Sometimes situations happen that go beyond the boundaries of a simple friendship. Kissing, for example, is something that can happen between friends. It is normal to kiss when two people have feelings for each other or desire physical contact in a moment of euphoria. Sometimes it can happen because they are excited for some reason and follow their feelings without thinking. Regardless of the reason, many prefer to remain friends after such an incident. Fortunately, it is possible, if you commit yourself and communicate clearly.
Steps
Part 1 of 3: Communicating after a Kiss
Step 1. Give yourself a little break if you need it
You probably want to get away from the person you kissed with. By distancing yourself, you will be able to reduce what happened and have the strength you need to save your friendship.
- Take a month if you think you need a "break".
- If you want to give yourself a period of expulsion, tell the other person. You don't have to disappear, otherwise you risk compromising your relationships. Try saying, "After that kiss, I'm still confused and I need some time. I want to continue being your friend, but it would be better if we took a little break for a few weeks."
- If you want to keep seeing her, avoid being alone with her.
- Consider avoiding her company on certain occasions, such as to have an aperitif or to do anything else that could lower your inhibitions.
Step 2. Talk about it
The first thing you should do after the kiss is to talk about it. In fact, it's the first step in making sure you save your friendship. Basically, a comparison will allow you to determine how to behave and proceed.
- Confide what you think about what happened. Try to start it like this: "I think we should talk about what happened."
- Discuss possible repercussions on your relationship. For example, you might say, "I'm afraid the kissing incident will ruin our friendship."
- If you have a deep and sincere feeling that goes beyond friendship, do not hesitate to declare it. If one of you has fallen in love, he must know what the other is feeling as well. This way, you can continue your relationship with full awareness of your respective feelings.
Step 3. Come to an agreement
After talking about the kiss, you should come to an agreement on how best to handle the situation and move on. By doing so, you will know how to behave.
- You should try to understand how you want to move forward to preserve your friendship.
- Decide if and how to tell other friends what happened.
- Try to agree on which tracks your relationship should continue.
- Try to set boundaries, such as no kissing or no physical contact.
Step 4. Continue to communicate
Although the initial clarification should have solved many problems and established the right spirit to continue your friendship, you may still be confused about your relationship. At the same time, there is a possibility that you still feel something. This is why it is essential to continue communicating to avoid misunderstandings.
Step 5. Continue to be open and honest about what you are feeling
Try saying, "I think we should be completely honest about what we think about the kiss incident and about our feelings as well."
- If your friend wants to talk to you, encourage them to do so.
- Communicate your emotions regularly if it is healthy for your friendship. You could talk about it every week, or even more frequently.
Part 2 of 3: Acting after the Kiss
Step 1. Respect the agreement
After you have communicated, reached an agreement and clarified any doubts, you must respect the agreement you have established so that no embarrassing situations arise.
- Try to assimilate what the other person said in your conversations. If you have both agreed to continue being "friends", you should behave as such.
- If you still have feelings for him, resist the urge to follow your feelings. Remember that you have reached an agreement to preserve your friendship. If, on the other hand, the intention had been to start a relationship, the decision would have been different.
- Remember that the kiss was just an accident. Your goal is not to ruin your friendship.
Step 2. Act normally in his presence
To remain his friend, you must have a normal attitude. If you seem uncomfortable or treat the other person differently, you risk hurting your relationship.
- You don't have to get nervous or avoid it. The kiss happened spontaneously, so behave naturally.
- If you are nervous or have trouble with him, talk about it together.
- It is normal to feel nervous or uncomfortable after a kiss. Try taking a few deep breaths and remember that the nervousness and embarrassment will disappear over time.
Step 3. Stay friends
Perhaps the most important thing to do to stay friends is this: stay friends. If you continue this way and behave as you always have, you will have the opportunity to maintain your relationship with the other person.
- Keep talking to her as you always have, confiding in her and explaining everything you think and feel.
- Keep dating. Don't stop doing everything you did before the kissing incident.
- Continue to consider yourselves friends. If you no longer see the other person as a friend, you will have no chance of keeping your relationship.
Part 3 of 3: Confronting Others
Step 1. Avoid talking to others about what happened
An important thing to remember is not to tell other people about the kissing episode. By trusting the details of the story or talking about the clarifications that have occurred, you will put your friendship in danger. Remember that the incident and subsequent explanations took place in a climate of trust and intimacy.
- If you keep what happened to yourself, you will not risk spreading rumors that could offend you or damage your serenity.
- Avoid involving other people in clarifying what happened. It's best to handle this kind of situation yourself.
- If you have to talk to others about it, you both have to decide.
Step 2. Don't give in to jealousy
It may happen that one of you starts a romance shortly after the kiss episode. While there is nothing strange about feeling a little jealous of your new partner, you need to keep this feeling in check so that it doesn't take over. Ultimately, jealousy and resentment can only compromise your friendship.
- Don't misbehave or be passive-aggressive if your friend is engaged.
- Tell yourself you want her happiness. If his new partner makes him happy, you should be happy for him.
- Consider his partner as a friend as well. If you treat him badly, you will only endanger your relationship.
- If problems arise between you and your boyfriend, it's best not to say what you think and avoid arguing.
Step 3. Continue to associate with friendships you have in common
To protect your relationship, you must continue to interact even when you are in a group and, therefore, continue to see each other alone and with the rest of the group.
- Keep doing the same things you did before. If it means going to the cinema together (with other friends), don't hesitate.
- Don't try to win the sympathy of someone in the group to get them on your side if you think your friendship is falling apart.
- If you used to suggest fun activities to your friends, don't stop and don't exclude the person you kissed with.
