Forgetting the pearls of wisdom promoted by the film Harry Meet Sally, it is good to know that it is not so impossible for a boy and a girl to manage a platonic friendship. Obviously there must be no attraction between the two, or a good dose of self-control. Follow these tips if you would like to have a friend of the opposite sex.
Steps
Step 1. Find the person you would like to befriend
Look for a guy you would like to be friends with, someone who has the same interests as you or who is compatible with you. It is advisable to have at least one interest in common, otherwise you will not know what to talk about when you are with him.
Step 2. Once you have decided which guy to approach, talk to him as you would any other person
Pay attention to some signs, do not flirt and see if he is flirting - do not give him the wrong impression! Find out what he likes and encourage him to talk to you, let him know that you want to know more about his interests.
Step 3. After a few conversations the boy will understand that you are becoming friends
Give him some space, let him go out with other people, don't expect him to go out only with you. When you meet him during the day, greet him, let him know that you are in the same place without focusing your gaze on him. Little by little he will begin to consider you as a friend. And once again, be careful not to flirt: there is nothing worse than giving the wrong impression.
Step 4. Meet the guy with some of your friends
It's always better to start dating in public than to go out alone the two of you. Being in a group the boy will understand that you are seeking his attention to talk and confront, but nothing more. From the moment he feels comfortable with your friends and with you, ask him if he would like to go out. If he tells you he can't, don't worry.
Step 5. Sometimes girls are too pressing towards friends of the opposite sex, making it annoying
If you bother him, it won't be difficult to understand. Don't be angry if he refuses to go out with you. If you are truly becoming friends, there will be no shortage of opportunities!
Step 6. Increase your self-esteem
Think about your skills and compliment yourself. It might sound silly but repeating in the mirror "I'm good at this and I'm proud of it" at least 10 times can help you. Guys want determined girls as friends. Who would want to have a person who hates themselves at their side?
Step 7. Follow basic hygiene rules
Shower often and use deodorant. Trim your nails and take care of your hair. Wear the clothes you normally wear and don't go overboard with your makeup and perfume. Many guys hate people who wear too much makeup, others are allergic to perfume! Never be scruffy!
Step 8. Be yourself
Check if your school organizes groups whose theme is your favorite interest. There may be some artistic activities planned: if you want to follow them, start doing it. There are guys who share the same passion as you.
Step 9. When you see a guy try to talk to him
If he takes the same course as you, it will be easy, the conversation will arise spontaneously! If you want to talk about a different topic, do it. Here are some examples.
- Tell him lunch wasn't exactly great today. Was there something wrong with the canteen meatloaf?
- Talk to him about the weather. It's an old way, but still a good way to start a conversation.
- Ask him how the football match went. Normally kids love sports, and if you know a few things about a game it'll be a topic they'll enjoy talking about.
Step 10. Show your interest
If you enjoyed being with him, tell him you have to go but would like you to talk again. When you see him again, talk to him! The more you talk, the closer the relationship between you will be. It might be embarrassing to be seen hanging out with a guy, but it's worth it. Many of these friendships are generally very fulfilling, and who knows that one day that bond will not turn into "something more".
Step 11. When you have finally found your friend, invite him to do something with you, have fun and spend time together
By attending you, your friendship will grow stronger and stronger!
Advice
- If you see the guy more than once a day, try to alternate times when you go to him with others when he is coming to you. You will understand that he too is interested in being your friend.
- Sometimes guys like to make comments a little pushed in front of their friends. So, if he says a few sexual jokes, don't be shocked!
- Be yourself and he will like you.
- Talk to his friends too. Let them know who you are.
- When he's talking to his friends, stay on his side and contribute to the conversation.
Warnings
- Don't always talk about yourself! Let the conversation flow, talk about general topics, don't put yourself on a pedestal.
- Don't be irritating. Let him come to you every now and then. Don't always be in front of him.
- Be careful not to flirt.
