Having a positive attitude is a choice. You can choose to have thoughts that improve your mood through a constructive vision of difficult situations and to color your days with bright colors, approaching everything you do with confidence. By choosing a positive mindset, you can begin to remove negativity from your mind and be able to see life as a place full of possibilities and solutions, rather than worries and obstacles. If you want to know how to think positively, follow these effective tips.
Steps
Part 1 of 3: Evaluate Your Thoughts
Step 1. Take responsibility for your attitude
You are solely responsible for your thoughts, and your perspective on life is your choice. If you tend to think negatively, it is because you choose to do so. With practice, you can learn to have a more positive point of view.
Step 2. Understand the benefits of positive thinking
Choosing to have more positive thoughts will not only help you have more control over your life, making everyday experiences more enjoyable, but it will also have countless benefits on your physical and mental health, as well as your ability to cope with change. Be aware that these benefits can help you be even more motivated, and consistent, in your choice to think positively. Here are some of the most important benefits of positive thinking:
- Increased life expectancy.
- Lower levels of depression and stress.
- Better resistance to common flu.
- Mental and physical well-being.
- Greater ability to overcome times of stress.
- A better natural ability to form relationships and important bonds.
Step 3. Keep a journal to reflect on your thoughts
By recording your daily thoughts, you will be able to identify their development patterns in advance, being able to recognize in time the formation of positive and negative thoughts. Write down your impending thoughts and feelings and try to identify their triggers - whether they are positive or negative. At the end of each day, spend twenty minutes analyzing your thinking pattern and trying to identify what went wrong and how you can make improvements.
- You can give your diary any shape you like. If the idea of dwelling on long descriptions of your reflections does not appeal to you, you can limit yourself to listing your five prevalent negative and positive thoughts daily.
- Periodically, make sure you take the time and opportunity to evaluate the information in your journal. If you fill it out every day, take the time to reflect on your words over the weekend.
Part 2 of 3: Fighting Negative Thoughts
Step 1. Identify your automatic negative thoughts
With the goal of eliminating negative thoughts that take you away from a positive attitude, you need to become more aware of your "automatic negative thoughts". Once you recognize them, you will develop the power to challenge them, ordering them to leave your mind immediately.
The following is an example of automatic negative thinking: you learned that you will soon have to take an exam and immediately thought "It will probably go wrong." As the first reaction to the news of an exam coming up, it is an automatic thought
Step 2. Challenge your negative thoughts
Even though you have spent most of your life thinking negatively, there is no reason to continue being negative. Whenever you notice the arrival of a negative thought, especially if it is automatic, stop and evaluate its real accuracy and truthfulness.
- Being objective is a way to challenge negative thoughts. Write down the negative thoughts on a piece of paper and stop and think: what would your reaction be if they were formulated by someone else's mind? In all likelihood, if it came from the outside, you would be able to contest such negativity, but you struggle to reject it when it comes to yourself.
- Your negative thought could be, for example: "I always fail exams". But if that were the case, you'd probably still be in fifth grade. Mentally review your path and stop to notice the achievements that have allowed you to advance thus challenging your negative thoughts. Some memories of past exams with enormous success may even surface, confirming that your current negativity is truly exaggerated.
Step 3. Replace negative thoughts with positive thoughts
When you feel you can face and challenge negative thoughts with confidence, you will be ready to make active choices, replacing negative thoughts with positive ones. This does not mean that from now on every aspect of your life will flow positively, it is normal in fact to experience a wide variety of emotions, however you can commit to replacing those daily thought patterns that over the years have proved useless with favorable thoughts that you help to live better.
- For example, you thought: "I probably won't pass the exam"… stop here! You have already identified the thought and have already assessed its accuracy. Now try replacing it with a positive thought. For it to be positive, a thought does not necessarily have to be blindly optimistic, for example "I will pass the exam with full marks, even if I am not studying". Something simple and constructive is preferable such as: "I will study and prepare in time and on the day of the exam I will do my best".
- Use the power of questions. Whenever you ask your brain a question, you urge it to find an answer. Asking yourself "Why is life so unfair?" you will force your mind to try to answer your question. The same happens if you ask yourself "What did I do to deserve such a fortune?". Make an effort to ask yourself questions that force you to focus solely on positive thoughts.
Step 4. Minimize the external influences that stimulate your negativity
Sometimes certain types of music or violent movies and video games prove to be able to condition our general attitude. Try to minimize the time you expose yourself to violent and stressful stimuli by dedicating yourself instead to listening to and reading relaxing pieces of music and literature. Music has real benefits for mental well-being, and books dealing with positive thinking can provide you with helpful tips that will help you become a happier person.
Step 5. Pay attention to the "black or white" vision
In "all or nothing" thinking, also called "dichotomous thinking", everything you analyze is white or black, without any shade of gray. Such an attitude can lead you to think that you either do things perfectly or you don't do them at all.
- To avoid these kinds of thoughts, embrace shades of gray into your life. Instead of thinking in terms of just two possible outcomes, one positive and one negative, make a list of all the possible solutions in between - you may find that things aren't as bad as they seem.
-
For example, if you have to take an exam shortly and the subject matter makes you difficult, you may be tempted to postpone it to the future or not to study at all. In this case, your failure would be attributable solely to your decision not to make even an attempt to succeed and your decision to ignore the fact that, surely, by dedicating the right time to the study of the subject, you could get a better result.
You should also avoid thinking that the only possible results are "excellent" or "grossly insufficient". Between these two extremes exists a large "gray area"
Step 6. Don't "customize" the facts
Personalizing means assuming that you are personally guilty of all adversity. By taking this way of thinking to the extreme, you risk becoming paranoid and assuming that nobody likes you and that your every gesture inevitably ends up disappointing or disappointing someone.
Personalizing a person you might think, "Betty didn't smile at me this morning. I must have done something that upset her." But most likely Betty is simply having a bad day, and you will just frustrate yourself trying to figure out how you may have hurt her
Step 7. Avoid "filter thinking"
The filtering thought is what leads you to choose to listen only to the negative aspects of a situation. Most experiences contain both good and bad elements, and it is helpful to know how to recognize both. Because of filtering thinking, you may never be able to notice anything positive in any situation.
For example, you may have to go through a school test and receive a pass grade, plus a note from the teacher who is very satisfied with your progress. In this case, the filtering thought could lead you to focus only on the sufficient grade, and to completely neglect the positive fact of having shown that you can grow and improve
Step 8. Don't be "catastrophic"
Being catastrophic means assuming that the worst possible scenario is about to happen. Generally, we tend to be catastrophic when we are anxious because we are afraid of not succeeding in something. In order to effectively combat catastrophism, strive to be realistic in evaluating the possible outcomes of each situation.
Here's an example: You might feel like you can't pass an exam despite being prepared. If you were catastrophic you would take your insecurity to the extreme by convincing yourself that you will soon fail all the required exams and will be forced to leave your studies, only to end up unemployed and dependent on public benefits. If, on the other hand, you were realistic about the consequences of a negative result, you would be able to realize that, even if you fail one exam, it is unlikely that you will fail any of the following and therefore you will not be forced to leave the university
Step 9. Visit a quiet place
Having a personal place to retreat to when you need to review your behavior can be very helpful. Many people confirm that spending some time outdoors can make them feel better.
- If there are any benches or picnic tables around your workplace, take the time to go there to relax and enjoy the fresh air.
- If you don't have the opportunity to go out and go to a quiet place, try meditating and use your imagination to visualize an open, calm, and pleasant climate.
Part 3 of 3: Living Optimistically
Step 1. Give yourself time to change
Developing a positive attitude means developing a real skill. Like any other skill, to be acquired and mastered, this too requires time, practice and the determination not to fall back into the old habit of negative thinking.
Step 2. Be physically positive
When you change your physical or bodily habits, your mind is also inclined to do the same. To be able to generally feel happier, address your physicality in a positive way. Maintain a correct posture, with your back straight and your shoulders relaxed and well turned back. When you sit down, avoid collapsing in on yourself or letting go so as not to receive a negative impulse. Smile more often. Looking at you smile, others will be inclined to do the same, and your body will convince itself that it is happy.
Step 3. Be aware
Being more aware of your actions and your life will help you be happier. When you just follow the flow of life like a robot, you risk losing the ability to enjoy the little everyday things. By becoming aware of your surroundings, the choices you make and your daily activities, you will be able to take greater control over your life and your happiness.
- Consider learning to meditate to help you become more centered and improve your ability to concentrate. By meditating every day for 10-20 minutes, at the time of day you prefer, you can increase your awareness of yourself and of the present moment.
- Try taking a yoga class. Like meditation, yoga can help you become more aware of the world around you by connecting with your breath.
- Even a simple pause of a few minutes, to breathe deeply and let your mind rest, may be able to make you feel happier.
Step 4. Explore your creative side
If you've never had the chance to explore your creative side before, now is the time to do it! Finding the time to express yourself through art, to create manually and to explore your most authentic thoughts - it can help you to greatly open your mind and, consequently, to think more positively. Even if you are convinced that you have no natural inclination towards art and creativity, make an effort to notice that there are many ways to be able to express your personality in order to be able to become more positive.
- Sign up for a class related to a hobby you've never experienced before, such as ceramics, painting, poetry, wood inlay, etc.
- Try learning a new manual skill, for example in sewing, knitting, crochet or embroidery. If you are a beginner and do not want to take lessons, start by following some online tutorials and go to a provided haberdashery.
- Take a pad, and express yourself every day through sketches and drawings. Review your older creations and try to turn them into something new.
- Become a creative writer. Try composing a poem, a short story, or even try your hand at a novel. If you want, you can even perform by reciting your poem in a public event.
- Try role-playing by dressing up as your favorite TV or actor character, or audition at the local theater.
Step 5. Surround yourself with positive people
We are often influenced by the people around us. If you find that people close to you tend to be negative, commit to seeing more positive ones, your own positivity will benefit from it. If you have a close friend, family member, or partner who is consistently negative, try encouraging them to accompany you on your journey to positivity.
- Avoid people who drain your energy and motivation. If you can't help but see them, or if you don't want to kick them out of your life, learn not to let them upset you and try to keep your dating to a minimum.
- Avoid negative partners. If you yourself are prone to negative thoughts, the constant presence of a negative person will cause you to get trapped. In case you both want to be able to become more positive, however, seeking help together could be a great solution.
Step 6. Set yourself meaningful goals
Whatever they are, commit to reaching them and keeping yourself motivated. Each time you hit a milestone, you'll feel inspired to keep chasing the next ones and adding more to your list. Each new achievement, however small it may be, will allow you to gain more confidence and self-esteem, bringing new positivity into your life.
Committing yourself to achieving your goals, even by taking small steps, will allow you to feel happier
Step 7. Don't neglect the fun
People who allow themselves to have fun regularly live happier and more positive lives because they don't feel overwhelmed by the grind and monotony. Recreation allows you to take a break from hard work and daily challenges. Note that not everyone has fun in the same way, so it will be important for you to be able to identify which activities you find really fun.
Always find time to laugh. Spend time with friends who make you laugh and have fun the most, watch the most comical movies or go to the cabaret. When your sense of humor is stimulated, being able to have negative thoughts immediately becomes complicated
Advice
- "Positivity attracts positivity" and, likewise, "negativity attracts negativity". If you are kind, nice and helpful to others, you can expect to receive the same treatment. Conversely, if you are rude, rude and unkind, people will disrespect you and avoid you because of your unpleasant behavior.
- Controlling the events of our life is not always possible, but it is always possible to control our feelings and thoughts about them. You can choose to look at things positively or negatively. You decide.
- Keep fit and eat healthy - both of these actions are essential if you want to have a positive attitude. It's harder to be positive when you're sick and / or out of shape.
- Laugh often. Laughter and positive emotions, unleashed by comedy, fun and your favorite activities, allow you to keep the spirit high. In fact, it's good to laugh even at critical moments - sometimes humor is all it takes to start solving a problem.
- If at the end of the day it seems to you that everything has gone wrong, stop and commit to identifying the small positive events that you are surely missing; he also notes how things could have been much worse. By changing your perspective you will be amazed at how favorable your day actually was.
- If you want to have positive thoughts and behaviors, it is important to be able to have a feeling of control over your life.
Warnings
- Sometimes past or future get in the way of positive thinking. If you are stuck in the past, and you let sad or bad experiences affect your present, learn to accept what happened and stop allowing it to impact your current thoughts and attitude. If, on the other hand, you are totally focused on the future, at the expense of the present, try to be less worried about what will happen and start living more in the present.
- Anxiety and depression are real diseases that need medical attention. Although negative thinking can worsen or prolong both pathologies, they should never be compared with superficiality. If necessary, seek immediate medical support for this type of mental illness - the sooner you get help, the sooner you get your life back and you can feel good again.
- If you have suicidal thoughts, seek help immediately. Life is worth living and you deserve to live it fully. There are tons of people out there ready to help you overcome despair and adversity.
