Anxiety-related disorders are numerous and range from post-traumatic stress to panic attacks, but all are united by one common thread: fear. Although every individual has to face fear every day, in anxious individuals this emotion seriously interferes with the ability to carry out normal daily activities at work, school or in interpersonal relationships. Having one of these ailments can make you feel desperate, but there are ways to find help.
Steps
Part 1 of 4: Leveraging the "Four As" Method
Step 1. Follow the "Four As" method
There are four ways to manage most situations that generate anxiety: toturn it around, toalter it, todate or toaccept it. The first two aim to change the situation, while the other two predict a change in reaction. Try a combination of these approaches and evaluate the one that best suits your needs, remembering that what may work in one circumstance may be ineffective in another.
Step 2. Avoid stressful factors whenever possible
The first TO stands for "bypassing unnecessary stress". Try to observe with detachment what creates the emotional pressure in your life. To identify the factors that trigger anxiety, it may be useful to keep a diary in which to note the moments in which you feel stressed and the related events that occur in the environment and in interpersonal relationships.
- A common source of anxiety is the feeling of being "overwhelmed" by different commitments (family, partner, work, school and so on). Learn to say "no" when you need to get rid of unnecessary stress.
- Dealing with unpleasant people or situations is another anxiety factor. If you feel like someone is constantly making you feel pressured, consider talking to them about these emotions of yours. If the interlocutor does not change their behavior, reduce the time you spend with them.
- Certain topics, such as politics or religion, can trigger a feeling of apprehension when you have to discuss them. Try to avoid conversations focused on these topics if they make you feel very anxious.
Step 3. Change the factors that cause stress
In some cases, you can't just escape a situation like this, but you can alter it to reduce the amount of apprehension it generates. All of this means having to find a new way to approach or try new communication tactics.
- For example, if the daily commute to work makes you fear that you might be involved in a car accident, consider taking a bus or other public transport option. You probably can't help but go to work, but you can change the way you go to reduce stress.
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Another common source of anxiety is relationships. In most cases, you can change the dynamics by taking advantage of assertive communication. This type of interaction focuses on communicating thoughts, feelings and needs in a clear, direct and respectful way.
For example, if you feel anxious because your mother calls you every day to "check" that everything is okay, even if you are now attending university, you can try to make her understand what you are feeling with these words: "Mom, I appreciate that you I want to make sure she's okay, but having to constantly account for my days makes me feel pressured. How about you only call me on weekends? I'll tell you everything that happened on that occasion."
- Time management is another major source of anxiety for many people. In addition to learning to say "no" to too many commitments, plan your time wisely. Use a specific calendar or application to track responsibilities. Plan challenging tasks like events or big projects in advance. You may not be able to avoid them, but knowing that they are on schedule and that you have plenty of time to prepare, you can reduce the worries.
Step 4. Adapt when needed
In some cases, there is nothing you can do to change or avoid the stressors. You probably can't change jobs right away, even if you don't like it. Maybe you got stuck in traffic that is simply making you late to the office. In these cases, focus on changing your reaction to the situation and adapt.
- Try to change the perspective from which you look at the problems and factors that trigger anxiety. For example, you may not be able to afford to change jobs immediately, even if you hate dealing with clients with all your might and this causes you a lot of stress. You could reevaluate this negative situation in a positive way; for example, you can view your current job as an experience for the future that teaches you how to handle "difficult" people.
- Try to keep a broad view of the situation. People with an anxiety disorder often worry about how others judge and view them. The next time you feel anxious about something, like a public presentation, ask yourself what the importance of this event is in a larger context, if it will have some weight for a week, a month or a year. Chances are it's not as important as you feel it is right now.
- Changing your standards often allows you to reduce anxiety. Perfectionism is strongly related to depression and anxiety. If unrealistic standards are the cause of your ailment, try to bring them to a reasonable level. Remind yourself that you can pursue excellence without aiming for perfection - allowing yourself to make mistakes and adjust to them allows you to be more successful in the long run.
Step 5. Accept what you cannot control
The illusion of being in control causes many people to put themselves under pressure by setting expectations; some typical phrases people repeat to themselves are: "I should" get over a loss, "I should" like my job, "I should" have a great relationship. However, you cannot control the actions and reactions of others, only your own. Remember that there are things that are beyond your control and strive to be able to let go of those that you cannot change.
- Instead of feeling anxious because you cannot impose your will on the partner in your relationship, focus on what you can handle, such as how you communicate. If the relationship problems continue, remember that you are doing everything in your faculty and that you cannot act for the other person as well.
- Look at the bright side. This approach might sound sentimental, but research suggests that looking at the "good sides" of a stressful situation or negative events can reduce anxiety and depression. For example, try not to see mistakes as "failures", but as opportunities to grow and learn. Framing daily mishaps in another light, such as missing the bus, can also make you feel less anxious and irritated.
Part 2 of 4: Solving Problems in Your Own Mind
Step 1. Find strategic techniques for managing stress
Anxiety builds up as a result of the excessive stress of daily life. A problem-solving and stress management-oriented approach helps you overcome anxiety factors and reduces worries. People who have a natural tendency to anxiety feel an intense need to control the environment even when this is not possible. Focus only on what you can manage.
Take a notebook and write down all the things you are afraid of right now. Try to think of different strategies to resolve these concerns or to address them appropriately. For example, if you are anxious for a speech that you will have to give shortly, you can plan some nightly exercises and, at some point, try to speak in front of a fake audience
Step 2. Challenge anxious thoughts
People with this disorder often have a tendency to overstate their worries or irrational mindset. Perhaps you are anxious about your brother who is on the road: you may be very worried about not having received any news or about having missed his call even for a few minutes. It is worth challenging and addressing these thoughts with a realistic approach.
For example, in the situation described above, you may start to think that something bad has happened to your brother or that he has been hurt. You can counter this belief by reading news about the area or the route of his journey. If no traffic incidents have been reported, you can make less catastrophic assumptions and assess that he simply delayed the call for some reason or that he does not have access to the phone
Step 3. Remember that you are not in danger
If you are afflicted with a very severe form of anxiety, such as frequent panic attacks, your body is constantly on the alert even when there is no reason. People who suffer from panic attacks feel that they are in danger of dying and that a misfortune is about to befall their lives. Rational thinking helps get rid of these apocalyptic visions.
Observe your surroundings. Is there any threat? If the answer is no, repeat this phrase constantly until you start to feel calm: "I'm not in danger, I'm safe." You can also stand in a corner, so you can constantly observe and check the situation, to make sure you are safe
Step 4. Avoid driving your emotions away
Anxiety can grow when you try to ignore or push it away. In certain situations, the fear of anxiety is a source of greater anxiety. When you start feeling these emotions, try to internalize them with a long, deep breath. Observe what you are thinking and how you feel, but try not to react, simply become aware of your mental and physical state.
You can also use your sense of humor when you feel anxiety is about to assault you. You can deal with these emotions by saying "Get it right!" or "Show me what you can do!". By acting as if you are not afraid of anxiety and simply accepting the fact that you are experiencing that emotion right now, you can get rid of it quickly
Part 3 of 4: Taking Care of Yourself
Step 1. Practice deep breathing
Imagine the abdomen is a balloon. Breathe in completely and deeply through your nose as you feel your belly swell. Afterwards, gradually exhale reducing the size of the abdomen.
You can do these exercises during a panic attack or several times throughout the day to lower your stress levels and stave off anxiety. The ideal would be to engage in deep breathing for 20-30 minutes a day. It may be helpful to mentally repeat a mantra, for example the phrase "I am safe" or "I am perfectly calm"
Step 2. Practice staying calm through yoga or meditation
Set aside time each day to engage in calming activities to help get rid of anxiety or to keep it under control. During meditation you need to consciously clear your mind of fears or worries and focus on cleansing and relaxing breaths. Yoga uses stretching techniques, positions called "asanas" in combination with meditation and breathing to calm the whole body.
Read this article, do some research online, or sign up for a yoga class at your local gym
Step 3. Eat several balanced meals every day
Anxiety can get worse if you don't take care of your body. Follow a balanced diet with lean proteins, fruits, vegetables, whole grains and low-fat dairy products; you should eat 3-5 meals a day. Also have energizing snacks, such as nuts, fresh vegetables, and fruits, on hand to recharge your body between meals.
- Consume foods rich in healthy fatty acids, such as salmon and avocado, as well as complex carbohydrates from oats and brown rice, to fight anxiety naturally.
- Avoid caffeine and alcohol. These substances aggravate the state of anxiety; both make you feel more nervous and interfere with your sleep-wake rhythm.
Step 4. Exercise regularly at a level appropriate for your abilities
You can walk your dog to the park or engage in more vigorous activities, such as high-intensity interval training. Research shows that regular exercise promotes the production of endorphins, which improve mood and not only boost self-esteem, but also help the mind get rid of anxious thoughts.
- To stick to your training routine, it's best to choose a variety of different activities and rotate the ones you enjoy the most. For example, you might like to participate in some team sports more; however, he may also enjoy swimming alone, when you have no one to play with.
- Before starting a new fitness regimen, always talk to your doctor.
Step 5. Make sure you sleep well and get enough sleep
Most adults need around 8-9 hours of sleep per night. Both anxiety and stress interfere with rest and can keep you awake. If all worries keep crowding your mind, it's hard to calm down and doze off. However, sleep deprivation worsens anxiety. If you suffer from a chronic anxiety disorder, you run the risk of sleeping poorly and little.
- End your evening with relaxing activities that help prepare the mind for sleep. Take a relaxing bath, listen to a CD or watch a mindful meditation YouTube video, or read a book. Try to avoid too many stimuli from electronic devices, because blue light activates the brain and prevents you from sleeping.
- Avoid drinking coffee, caffeinated sodas, or eating chocolate before bed.
- Use the bedroom only for sleep and relaxation; do not watch television and do not work in bed.
Step 6. Engage in activities that you enjoy
An extremely effective way to combat an anxiety disorder is to often do something that distracts your mind from worries, giving you a feeling of peace or happiness. Activities depend on personal preferences, but they could be: sewing or knitting, reading a good book, praying or other spiritual practices, talking on the phone with a friend, listening to music, or playing with a pet.
Part 4 of 4: Asking Outside Help
Step 1. Seek professional help
If you are still plagued by anxiety, even though you have tried all the advice described so far, consult a professional such as a psychologist or psychiatrist. The therapist can assess your situation, determine which anxiety disorder you suffer from, and recommend treatment to manage your symptoms. Typical treatments for this problem are:
- Psychotherapy: during sessions, share the details of your concerns with a counselor or psychologist; together, establish strategies for overcoming anxiety or stressors. The therapist could use cognitive-behavioral techniques to change irrational mental patterns and discover healthy methods for controlling emotional pressure.
- Medication: When anxiety interferes with daily activities, prescription medication therapy may be helpful after consulting a psychiatrist. Medicines that are usually recommended for anxiety are antidepressants, anxiolytics and beta-blockers. The doctor collects your specific personal and family medical history to determine which type of medication is suitable for your situation.
- In some cases, the patient needs both medication and psychotherapy to manage anxiety. Regardless, remember that anxiety disorders are treatable with the right treatment.
Step 2. Talk to someone you trust
Make sure there is an individual you can confide in. It is not important that you know your disorder, what is really useful is being able to have an interlocutor with whom to discuss your concerns, be it a friend or a family member.
Step 3. Keep a journal
Your therapist or psychiatrist may recommend that you write a journal to identify your common fears and stressors. This way you can get to the deep root of your ailment and develop strategies to avoid triggers.
- The diary is the perfect place to "unload" all anxious thoughts and worries; however, you need to be careful not to use it as a means of brooding and worsening anxiety.
- At the beginning or end of the day, write an introduction to outline your current mood and the details of the day. You can safely write down some upsets, such as the next exam at school or the first date with a person. Use the diary to find strategies to reduce the emotional burden triggered by these events, as described earlier in the article. After a short session of jotting down all the methods that come to mind, close the journal and make a conscious effort to leave the worries and anxiety on the page. Focus only on solutions; in other words, take action to reduce the anxiety generated by the triggers, but don't keep ruminating on specific upsets.
Step 4. Try acupuncture
Alternative treatments, such as acupuncture, have been shown to be effective against anxiety and stress. Traditional Chinese medicine healers believe that when the body's qi (life energy) is out of balance, the person can suffer from ailments such as anxiety or depression. The needles are inserted at specific points to unblock qi, restoring general health and well-being. Talk to a psychiatrist, psychologist, or your family doctor to find out if acupuncture is a good solution for you.
Step 5. Know that you are not alone
For example, in the United States alone, about 40 million people face anxiety disorders on a daily basis, yet only a third of them are on treatment. If you can't manage anxiety on your own, make sure you seek outside help.
Advice
Take it one day at a time. Remember that anxiety doesn't go away overnight. Follow the strategies recommended above, celebrate the "good" days and accept that there are also bad ones
Warnings
- Get treatment quickly. Trying to "resign" and move on without specific treatment can seriously aggravate symptoms and / or lead to depression. In this way, the recovery becomes longer and more difficult.
- If you feel depressed or are thinking about suicide, seek help immediately.
