Friendship is a bond that should be inseparable, but when you find yourself in the difficult position of having to fire a friend, your relationship will inevitably be tested. In addition to the disappointment that your friend did not do what he was hired for, or perhaps the pity and sadness that your friend is simply a victim of operational cuts, you will face the burden of having to end the employment of yours. friend as his superior. Whatever the reason, it can be a very painful experience for both parties, which if mishandled, could destroy your friendship. While it is not easy to keep the two different relationships you have with this person separate and to follow the formal employment policy to fire an employee, it is necessary to achieve the desired goal and keep the friendship intact.
Steps
Step 1. Separate your role as an employer from that of a friend
You'll have to be the boss, not the friend, when you tell your friend he's fired. It is something important for your mental state and to give the right perception of what will happen to your friend.
Step 2. Clarify the reasons why your friend needs to be fired
Having clear ideas before approaching your friend is essential to avoid tripping over words or taking sides with your friend trying to defend himself. Also, understanding the reasons for the decision will at least make you feel a little better about it.
- Did the senior partner tell you to fire your friend? Did he give you a good reason? If not, ask for more detailed explanations.
- Have you discovered your friend in an unethical or harmful attitude to your business or work environment?
- Is your friend simply not a good fit for the role he was hired for? In this case, extending a working relationship that doesn't work would not be the right thing to do towards your friend and would be detrimental to your business.
Step 3. Consider the worst-case scenario regarding how your friend would react if you fire him in person
In other words, you will need to consider whether doing this firsthand action will be worth it, if in the worst case, your friend starts hating you from then on.
- If ethically incorrect actions are involved or if your friend has wronged other colleagues, the answer is probably yes.
- If after evaluating the reasons for your friend's dismissal you have decided that you don't want to do it to people, reconsider your decision, or talk to your boss and ask for him to do it.
Step 4. Be direct with your friend
Turning around or trying to play it down probably won't sweeten the pill and could actually give a false impression that things can change and your friend can keep his job. Creating this kind of uncertainty is incorrect and will ultimately have an even worse effect on your friendship.
Step 5. Explain the reasons for the dismissal
Tell your friend if it was your decision or if you were simply given this thankless assignment, but either way, acknowledge that it is your responsibility as a boss.
- Never lie about the reasons for sweetening them. It is much more correct to speak privately with your friend about his lack of work so that he knows what went wrong, because it will be useful in the future to avoid repeating the same mistakes.
- If you own a business and think you made a mistake when you hired your friend, be honest and admit it. Don't go into the crudest details though. Talk in general and simply explain that his skills are obviously better suited to a different job, and that you are sure it is the best solution for your friend as well.
Step 6. Explain that your friendship is very valuable to you
However, make it clear that friendship doesn't come into play right now and that you, or your company, are paying for work that was clearly not satisfactory. Soften this reality by explaining that as far as you are concerned, your work situation will not interfere with your social relationship and by reassuring your friend that your friendship will not suffer any setbacks. Help them understand that you value true friends and that while jobs come and go, the same doesn't apply to friends.
Don't force your friend to stay that way. The continuation of your friendship depends on how he reacts - be sure to make it clear, however, that with his approval you would like the relationship to continue
Step 7. Help your friend with the firing process
Explain his severance pay, help him move his things, prevent security personnel from bothering him, and give him all the little niceties you would like your boss to give you in this circumstance. Also, offer your friend your help to find another job. You could also offer to write a great letter of recommendation and help him write his cover letter and resume.
Step 8. Write a thank you card
Give your friend a written acknowledgment of your appreciation for their work. Don't type it - do it by hand to ensure a personal connection and make it more human.
Step 9. Continue living the friendship as normal as possible
After your friend leaves work, invite him every week to watch games or to do the things you've always done together. Your friend may not want to see you for a while, but if you show them how much your friendship matters to you, you may be able to save them. Don't be in a hurry and insist (but don't fall into stalking).
Method 1 of 1: If Performance Improvement Is an Option
Step 1. If you can give your friend another chance, here are some tips for doing so
Of course, you should also make sure that you follow the relevant employment and human resource laws regulations relevant to your work environment - the tips given here are a general guide only.
Step 2. Give your friend a chance to improve his performance by following or training him to overcome the problems that prevent him from performing well
Ask for an explanation as to why this happens.
- Tell your friend that his job is at risk and that he will need to show progress within a month.
- Document your discussion and maintain this relationship in employee records. You may need to defend your position in the future, and this document will be useful for you.
Step 3. Schedule weekly or fortnightly assessments to discuss your friend's job performance and check that he is meeting deadlines
Keep following your friend, training him and favoring him from a bureaucratic point of view to maximize the chances of progress.
- Since he is a friend, he will probably try to talk to you about the situation outside the workplace. You will have to make a decision regarding these private discussions, but it is advised not to endorse them as speaking in an unofficial capacity may give your friend false expectations. Be kind but firm and let your friend understand that you will do everything you can to help him at work, but that outside the office you are friends, not colleagues and it doesn't feel right to keep talking about work.
- You may find that your friend is paying attention to how he behaves in your presence. Give him reassurance about your friendship but don't be pushy - let your friend know your door is always open without sounding bossy.
Step 4. Reassess the situation after two weeks
If you still don't notice any progress in job performance, give your friend a second warning and explain that if things don't change over the next couple of weeks, you'll have to fire him.
Step 5. Explain that you are acting on the warnings you have given in the past, if there is no improvement in the next meeting as well
Then use the tips described above to tactfully fire your friend.
Advice
- Consult your company's human resources department and your attorney for advice before starting your friend's dismissal process. You will have to follow different procedures in each state.
- Avoid discussing personal matters during performance dialogues. Tell your friend that both of you will need to put your bond aside for the sake of the company - which employs both of you.
- Invent new things to do as friends. If your friendship revolved around the workplace, find out something else you can do together.
- In the future, you will find that it will be easier if you keep work relationships closely related to your role as colleagues and avoid any discussion related to work in a social environment. By keeping this distance, your actions will seem more objective and less personal if you have to fire a friend.
Warnings
- Make sure everything you do complies with labor laws to avoid having legal problems.
- Make sure the tasks assigned to your friend are reachable. If they are not, instead of firing him, change his position or hire another person who can help him.
- If you think firing a friend is too great a conflict of interest, talk to your boss or HR for further advice.
