Many couples have daily quarrels, and spouses often hope they can escape this situation to create a better life elsewhere. The longer they continue in strife, the more difficult it becomes to find positive feelings for the partner. Often, one of the spouses feels discouraged and feels that they are in a desperate situation regarding the possible survival of the marriage.
Steps
Step 1. You must want your relationship with the other to function at its best
Step 2. Think back to the things that made you fall in love with your spouse
If either one has changed, or if the initial feelings no longer exist, look for other qualities that attract you to the partner. Often, one or both spouses allow their marital actions and duties to be taken for granted. Many believe that no commitment is required after marriage, for example by believing that the affection they feel for each other is evident from the fact that there is a registered partnership. A successful marriage, on the other hand, requires attention, kindness, commitment and dedication from both spouses, just like during courtship.
Step 3. Be honest with your spouse
Share your feelings and thoughts. Knowing that the relationship is in crisis could be painful, but it's always best that you know so you can help. A mature evaluation by both of you can be helpful in resolving complicated feelings and creating a shared action plan.
Step 4. Communicate, communicate, communicate
Don't make accusations. Do not look for causes of conflict. These are elements that can destroy even the strongest relationships. Choose a specific time to discuss. Try to encourage conversation. Now is not the time to act passively. Failure to share responsibility for solving marriage problems can only worsen the feelings of the distressed partner.
Step 5. If you find that you are attracted to another person, you owe it to yourself, your spouse, and the other person to understand the nature of this attraction
This is normal if you feel dissatisfied in marriage, but if you are attracted to only a few positive aspects that you seem to miss from your spouse, but still love your spouse, try to talk to them so that they know your preferences.
Step 6. Try to encourage change in the spouse's behavior
At the same time you will need to be patient and accept to change yourself.
Step 7. When you are alone, think about your spouse
Remember the past and understand that in many cases the feeling that united you is still present, just a little tarnished.
Step 8. Finally, ask yourself and answer sincerely:
"Do I love my spouse?" If the answer is yes, do everything you can to improve your relationship.
Step 9. Be honest about your feelings
If you tell your spouse that you love him / her but your actions don't prove it, you will make the other person believe that you are playing with their feelings to get their attention. This behavior is not honest, it generates a lack of trust and uncertainty, and certainly exacerbates the problems of the couple. remember the reasons you love your spouse, and what made you fall in love initially.
Advice
- Your spouse should be your sounding board, not the person to punish in case of problems.
- If you need to unload after work, take a break in a quiet place, reflect on what happened during the day, and only then come back to share the rest of the day with your partner.
- Don't do anything covertly.
- Meditation is always relaxing.
- Lavender oil on the pillow helps reduce stress.
