If you have noticed changes in your wife's behavior, if she seems "absent" and subconsciously you begin to think that there may be another man in her life, you should first investigate your suspicions a little and seek a confrontation with her only if you have confirmations and tests. In this article, you will find some of the more common distress signals that could indicate your wife is cheating on you.
Steps
Part 1 of 3: Behavior Change in Your Social Life
Step 1. Notice how often she goes out with "friends"
If you suddenly start spending a lot of time with friendships that tend to exclude you, it could be a bad sign. Even if she claims she only goes out with friends, that may not be true.
- Understand that a casual date with friends is normal and healthy. It's not a bad sign in itself and it's perfectly normal. Just like when you yourself go out with friends and talk about things you would never talk to her about.
- It could be a problem if your wife starts considering these most important outings in your relationship, if she is not clear about where she goes and who she goes with, and if you can't contact her when she goes out.
- If she tells you she is going somewhere and you suspect she is going to meet another man, offer to accompany her. If he "changes his mind" at the last moment and decides not to go out, it could be a sign that his intention was most likely to spend some time with someone else.
- If your wife disappears every time for hours and just says she went shopping, she shows interest in the shops she went to or what she went to see, especially if she comes home empty-handed. Many women like to argue about it, so if she gets an elusive response, it could be a sign that she has gone elsewhere.
Step 2. Check for any changes in the way she treats your loved ones
If your wife begins to drift away from family members or friends with whom she once got along, she may feel guilty.
- If your wife is comfortable with your family and friends, she will understand that her "affair" with another man could hurt more people than just you. This could make her feel so guilty that she avoids certain situations as often as possible.
- Wives who cheat also worry that friends and family on the other side might notice that she is hiding something.
- In some cases, your family may be part of the problem instead. If your wife does not get along with your family and you often take their side, she may feel the lack of "allies" among the people around you.
Step 3. Listen carefully if he starts talking about new friendships
Usually women feel a strong need to talk about new and exciting things going on in their life, even if they are secret to keep. This new friendship he's telling you about could be something else.
Keep in mind that your wife may be using a fake name. Her new friend Samantha may actually be Samuel, but chances are she prefers to use a feminine name to keep you from getting suspicious
Step 4. Check for any changes in your smoking and drinking habits
If your wife usually drinks and smokes, you may not notice anything new. However, if you have never had any interest in alcohol and cigarettes and you smell these smells, it may be that the offending partner has made you take these vices.
Even if your wife sometimes drinks, beware of times when you feel the stench of alcohol on her. If you feel it after returning from an alleged long working day or at unusual times, such as in the afternoon, then there may be some problem
Step 5. Notice how long he works and how often he travels for work
Your wife may claim she is spending a lot of time at work, but if it has never happened before, this change could indicate that she is spending these extra hours out of the office.
- If you spend too much time away from home it could be bad news. For example, if a trip to the bank, grocery store, or hairdresser takes longer than usual, she may be doing something different than what she told you.
- Consider those trips he takes out of town without you that are not related to work. If she constantly visits her relatives alone, she may not be visiting only those, especially if she spends the night in a hotel and not at their home. If she tells you she's been to the hotel, ask her naturally which one and then take a look at the credit card charges. If there are no charges, maybe another person is paying for you.
Step 6. Check how much money he spends when he goes out
Relationships cost money. Take a look at your wife's receipts and credit card transactions. An increase in expenses may indicate that he is spending his money on someone new.
Similarly, you could check the kilometers traveled by car. If you notice he is walking a few more miles to get to the places he tells you to hang out, he is probably driving to someone he shouldn't be seeing
Part 2 of 3: Changes in his Behavior at Home
Step 1. See if there are any changes in the way he expresses his affection to you
In addition to being suspicious if your wife suddenly turns away from you, you may have suspicions even if she suddenly becomes very affectionate.
An unfaithful wife may give you a lot of attention to relieve guilt when you are together and may feel better about what she does when you are not around
Step 2. Notice his habits with the phone
This might be a little hard to notice, as most women spend a lot of time on the phone. But if you suddenly notice that your wife also uses her phone a lot to text or ends conversations just as you come home, it could indicate that there is someone in her life that she doesn't want to talk to you about.
- Ask her who she is talking to on the phone, especially when she leaves the room to answer. Determine if his explanations are truthful or if he is trying to make excuses about the person he was actually talking to.
- Also note the frequency, the times in which he receives and makes phone calls, as well as the tone of voice he uses.
Step 3. Determine if your wife has become very fussy about you
Many husbands think that wives often complain, but if yours has become much more critical of your behavior, chances are she is looking for reasons to justify her betrayal.
- If your wife starts acting like there's nothing good in what you do, even if she doesn't cheat on you, she's letting you know that there are problems in your relationship.
- On the other hand, it could be a bad sign even if your wife stops complaining altogether. If you've given her valid reasons not to complain anymore, great. If, on the other hand, you haven't changed your behavior and she becomes less critical for no reason, this could be a sign of indifference towards you and that she is channeling her emotional satisfactions elsewhere.
Step 4. Notice the changes in her sexual behavior
You may expect that if she cheats on you, she will no longer be sexually interested in you. Instead, there are many cases where sexual desire increases.
- Wanting to have more sex can be a way to alleviate the guilt of a betrayal.
- If your wife wants to have sex more often than usual, it may mean that she is having a romantic relationship with someone and is using you to satisfy sexual needs she cannot have from that man.
- On the other hand, if you had a good sex life and suddenly the flame of passion is extinguished, this may indicate that he is indulging his sexual desires with someone else.
Step 5. Look her in the eye
Instinctively, people avoid eye contact if they have something to hide and if they are lying. Look your wife in the eye during the day. If he cheats on you, he will often avoid eye contact.
This is very important when you ask her where she has been, with whom and what she has done. In this case, he will have to lie to you if he does not want to admit that he is cheating on you and will find it much more difficult to make eye contact with you than usual
Step 6. Check how much time is spent in front of the computer
Nowadays the computer is used to communicate as much as the telephone. If your wife spends her evenings in front of the computer and feels attacked when you ask her why, she may be sending emails and communicating via social media with someone who doesn't want you to know.
- Take a look at the history on the search engine when it's not there. If he deletes it, it can be a warning sign, as he is likely to want to hide something from you.
- Remember that cell phones are the most used computer. Ask her to see her phone. If he reacts defensively, it could be a sign that he has something to hide. If you have access to his cell phone instead, check for any apps that might be suspicious like Tinder or anything like that. Other apps like Skype, Snapchat, Kik or WhatsApp could be ways to hide possible contacts with another man, especially if the history of these apps is always deleted.
- Check your phone bills. Many providers provide detailed information regarding calls. Notice the presence of numbers you don't know.
Step 7. Treat slippery behaviors as negative signs
As a general rule, if your wife starts sharing fewer and fewer details about her days and thoughts, she may be hiding something from you and sharing her emotions with someone else.
Women are rarely reserved, unless there are compelling reasons to be. They are generally very inclined to open up and expose their feelings more than men, and while men can "hold back" complaints, women rarely have this behavior
Part 3 of 3: Changes in the way you take care of yourself
Step 1. Notice the changes in its appearance
When couples have been married for a long time, they often tend to let go. If your wife suddenly changes her hair color or somehow starts taking care of herself like she hasn't done in a while, she's probably doing it for another man.
- Usually women at the beginning of a relationship tend to take care of their physical appearance as much as possible, so if you have noticed that she is working to improve the appearance, it could be that in her life there is a new relationship.
- However, there is a possibility that it is doing it for you. If he senses the absence of passion and alchemy between you, he is simply trying to remedy the problem and be more attractive to you.
Step 2. Notice the busy shopping
Look closely at what he brings home in his shopping bags. If she buys lots of new clothes, she may want to show them to someone - especially if the clothes are low-cut or if she buys underwear.
Be alarmed if you buy sexy underwear and don't wear it in your bedroom. Also be alarmed if she buys clothes and doesn't put them on when you go out together
Step 3. Be careful if you start training in the gym
If your wife shows an unusual interest in fitness and has never done it before, she probably wants to be more attractive to a man who has just entered her life.
You understand, logically, that this is not a telltale sign. It is possible that she is getting in shape for valid reasons: maybe the doctor suggested it to avoid health problems, maybe her favorite dress no longer fits her or the new year has just started and the gym was on the list of his good intentions
Step 4. Check how often you shower in the "gym"
If he rarely takes a shower at home and says he did it at the gym, there is some chance that he is doing it at someone else's house, using the gym as a cover.
A cheating person always takes a shower before welcoming you home to get rid of the lover's smells
Step 5. Smell her perfume
Many spouses get used to the smell of their partners. If your wife smells funny, like cologne that you don't use, she may have had contact with someone else.
