Sooner or later, sadness affects everyone. In many cases it is a natural reaction to various life changes or events. The good news is that everyone has the ability to feel happy: it is in fact possible to take concrete actions to cultivate this ability and get better.
Steps
Method 1 of 4: Finding Happiness Within Yourself
Step 1. Write down your feelings
You could buy a diary to devote solely to your thoughts and emotions. It is often useful to entrust one's sadness to writing, in order to understand it better. This will help you tune into yourself and understand yourself on a deeper level.
- Journaling, even for just 20 minutes a day, helps you to clarify and organize the thoughts that revolve around your sadness. This can help you better define why you feel this way, and it also allows you to keep track of your behavioral and emotional patterns. Additionally, some research has found that keeping a journal can even help improve your health and strengthen your immune system by reducing stress.
- When writing, focus solely on the content, not the form. In other words, don't care about grammar or spelling. Here is an example of a journal note: "I had a particularly difficult day today. The sadness and thoughts related to divorce continue to haunt me. Sometimes I'm not sure it's okay to feel sad about it. After all, even if we separated a little bit. year ago, the marriage was long overdue. I know. But I am afraid that I have been trapped in the past and that my children are suffering from it. I am also angry with myself for not being able to get rid of sadness yet. To many I get divorced, so why am I having so much trouble? Talking to my sister helped me the last time I had a bad day. I think I'll call her. I know tomorrow is another day."
Step 2. Laugh and smile
Studies have shown that the simple act of smiling can be good for your mood and cheer you up. In addition, laughing releases endorphins, the chemicals of good mood.
- Even if you don't feel like it, using your smile and laugh facial muscles can make you feel better. So, try to pretend - it might feel forced at first, but laughing or smiling might trigger funny or happy memories and stimulate a laugh or a sincere smile.
- If you want to try to smile or laugh effortlessly, try watching a comedy movie, reading a humorous book, or spending time with a friend who can usually get a smile out of you.
Step 3. Relieve yourself with crying
Even if you don't want to cry because you are trying to feel better and want to regain lost happiness, sometimes crying can improve your mood. If you feel the need to let off steam, then don't hold back and let the tears flow as soon as you need to. Crying can make you feel better, more relieved - the act itself can give you the feeling of taking a weight off your chest.
- According to some studies, most people feel better after crying. This is partly due to the fact that crying is a tool used by the body itself to get rid of stress hormones.
- In any case, while crying is useful to combat stress and improve mood, it is important to remember that the inability to control tears can be a symptom of a more serious emotional or hormonal problem. If you find that you are unable to quit, you should seek help from a doctor or psychotherapist.
Step 4. Try to see the full picture
What else is your life worth living in? Try to think of all the other things that are important to you, such as friends, family, and health. You will likely find that you have more than one reason to be happy and grateful, even if you are not feeling particularly happy or grateful at the moment. Several studies have shown that gratitude is closely related to happiness.
- Think about good memories. If you have had happy moments in the past, you can relive them once again. That's the beauty of memory: a situation may seem complicated at some point, but that doesn't mean it will continue to be complicated in the future.
- If your sadness is due to an unimportant experience, such as a bad grade in school, put the event in perspective. Consider if you will feel sad about this even in 10 years and if at that point in your life the bad grade will have the same importance. Try repeating the old adage: "Don't get lost in a glass of water."
- Strive to find a reason every day to be happy. On social networks such as Facebook, Twitter and Instagram there are many challenges that use hashtags such as "100giornifelici" or "trovalaluce", to encourage people to identify small moments of happiness and gratitude in their life.
- Even if your sadness is due to a traumatic event, such as the loss of a loved one, reflecting on your life in general can be helpful. For example, you can find relief by remembering the good times you spent with your loved one, the sense of happiness and gratitude for having had him in your life, even if you suffer from this unexpected loss.
Step 5. Distract yourself
Sometimes in moments of sadness it is difficult to think of anything else. In any case, obsessing over this can do more harm than good, exacerbate the sense of worthlessness and helplessness. A leisurely distraction can help you focus on something other than sadness and even fight stress - scientists use the word "flow" to define this mechanism. You don't have to avoid your problems, but get involved in an activity that allows you to forget about time and space. Here are some ideas to distract you:
- Listen to some music. Try not to choose sad songs, but try to listen to energetic, cheerful, positive and happy ones. Also choose pieces that inspire you and make you rethink pleasant moments. Music can be a very effective therapeutic tool - it is also used for this purpose.
- See some photos from your childhood, travel, graduation or other important event. If you find a nice one, don't put it away right away, but take a good look at it: it will help you remember that life goes by fast, that you have lived many happy and funny moments, not just sad ones.
Step 6. Read
Get lost in another world or in the past. Books transport you to places you don't know, more adventurous and romantic than those you actually know. Whether you are reading historical or love novels, getting absorbed in another world will help you relax your mind and shift your attention elsewhere. Six minutes of reading is enough to reduce stress by two thirds.
Method 2 of 4: Evaluate Your Sadness
Step 1. Understand the sadness
Sadness belongs to a much greater painful experience. It is a bitter emotion, usually temporary, that arises from external factors, such as a romantic breakup, an argument or a disagreement with a dear friend, the estrangement from one's family or the loss of a loved one. It is a normal emotion that almost everyone feels at one time or another.
The sadness that arises from a pain reaction can affect your ability to concentrate, appetite and sleep
Step 2. Know the difference between sadness and depression
It is important to distinguish between sadness and depression, because the treatments to deal with them are very different. Unlike sadness, depression usually has no identifiable external cause - it just feels. Comparing it to sadness, it is a much more serious problem that causes moral depression, insomnia or drowsiness, weight gain or weight loss, greater or lesser appetite, little energy, lack of interest in the surrounding world, distancing from social situations, poor concentration and sense of uselessness.
- One of the main differences between depression and sadness is the ability to feel pleasure, love and hope. When a person is sad, they can usually still enjoy moments of happiness and pleasure. On the other hand, in the case of depression, many feel unable to feel pleasure, hope or other positive emotions, witnessing a real emotional flattening. Furthermore, for depressed people, sadness is like a cloud that follows them wherever they go, with no way out. They have a tendency to brood, obsess, and feel unable to experience happiness.
- Depression is also long-lasting, so it can happen that an individual struggles with it for months, years or a lifetime. Instead, sadness is usually temporary. If you feel that you are unable to deal with it effectively (for example, it negatively affects your daily life and you are actually afraid that you are suffering from depression), you should consult an expert. Treating depression may require psychotherapy and medication. In order to receive targeted care, it is therefore important to assess whether what you are experiencing is occasional sadness or has a chronic character.
Step 3. Reflect on your emotions
Have you recently had an experience that could help you understand your emotions better? For example, have you just experienced a romantic breakup or a loss in the family? Identifying the cause of sadness will help you understand it better and move beyond it. Reflecting on external factors will also confirm that sadness is a normal reaction to a certain event, so you can discard chronic depression.
- Also, knowing the reason for your sadness will help you determine the right ways to alleviate it. For example, the sadness you feel after ending a three-month engagement is markedly different from the sadness you would have when a spouse died after 10 years of marriage.
- If you have experienced a great loss or trauma, it may be helpful to consult a professional who can work with you to develop strategies for coping with sadness and grief. According to the Holmes-Rahe scale, the stressful events that most affect a person's mental and physical well-being include the death of a spouse, divorce, marital separation, and the death of a close family member. In cases where sadness is more predisposed to being extreme, the techniques described below can be effective in conjunction with therapy.
Method 3 of 4: Doing Fun Activities
Step 1. Exercise
Go for a walk, a run or a bike ride. Try a team sport. Do any activity that encourages you to get up and move: exercise will allow the body to release endorphins, the chemicals of good mood, which improve the mood and inhibit the stress reaction.
Any type of exercise or physical activity that requires you to expend energy and contract your muscles will prompt the body to release endorphins. So, even if you don't feel like going to a spin class or running 5km, cleaning the house or taking a 15-20 minute walk can still help your body release the endorphins it needs to feel better
Step 2. Have a healthy snack
Scientists have confirmed that food and meal times can affect feelings and moods. If you are sad, try eating a low-fat, low-protein but high-carbohydrate snack, such as toasted scones with jam. When carbohydrate-rich foods are not inhibited by the presence of proteins or fats, they promote the release of an amino acid called tryptophan within the brain, which then turns into serotonin, a mood-enhancing neurotransmitter - it all happens in the long run. 30 minutes.
You could also eat some popcorn or a slice of wholemeal bread. But be sure to avoid protein-rich foods, such as cheese and poultry. They suppress serotonin because all the amino acids they contain compete with tryptophan, thereby preventing its release into the brain
Step 3. Do something spontaneous
Sometimes monotony can cause negativity. Do something sudden (but don't make hasty decisions!). Visit a friend or a museum, surprise your mom with lunch, or go out of town on the weekend. By changing your habits a little, you could rediscover a great passion for life.
You could also spice up your routine a bit by slightly tweaking your daily habits. For example, prepare yourself in a different order in the morning, such as having coffee after taking a shower. Leave early to go to work. Break your daily habits for a few days and see how you feel. Sometimes the habits you adopt are only comfortable at first, only to become a trap
Step 4. Try pursuing a hobby
Channel negative or overwhelming emotions into another activity. Do something you enjoy and relax, such as painting, taking photographs, writing poetry or making pottery. Find an activity that gives you peace and takes you away from everyday struggles. This does not mean that you will be able to escape from sadness, but you will become better at dealing with it because you will make time for an enjoyable activity.
You might even try a new business. Maybe you've always wanted to do yoga, but never got the chance. Dedicate to something new to freshen up your life. Trying out a different activity or hobby can also help you get to know people like you
Step 5. Take a shower or bath
You will be surprised to find that a simple shower can lift your spirits. You could use colder water than usual - a cold shower can be very effective, even healing. According to research, it can improve circulation and arterial flow, reduce stress and tension, improve mood. The cold releases endorphins into the bloodstream and brain, so you will feel a feeling of invigoration and positivity.
If you prefer to take a bath, try using a handful of Epsom salts (about a cup or two). In addition to helping to expel toxins and reduce tension, they have been shown to trigger the release of endorphins, reducing stress and improving mood
Method 4 of 4: Socialize
Step 1. Talk to a friend
Having social contacts and a support network is a very important factor in being happy. If you discuss your sadness or its cause with a friend, this can help you fight the pain, because you will realize that someone cares about your life and your feelings. Speaking aloud also allows you to express your emotions. Since you have to define them with concrete words, this allows you to clarify your feelings exactly. Sadness will no longer be abstract, it will become real, it can be named, discussed and articulated with words.
- According to research, people who experience particularly stressful life experiences, such as the loss of a partner or the loss of a job, are more able to overcome them thanks to a network of friends and family that they can ask for help and can rely on.
- Talking to a friend can also teach you something. For example, they may have had similar feelings or situations, so they can offer you advice and support. Alternatively, it may help you look at the situation from a different perspective and perhaps suggest coping methods you haven't thought about yet. For example, if you are going through a romantic breakup, he may remind you of all those times you called him, complaining that your girlfriend was selfish and careless. In short, she can remind you of all the reasons you left her just when you feel trapped and sad about the breakup itself.
- Your friends can also help you feel supported and relieve loneliness by offering you a space for listening and understanding. Also, sometimes just talking to a friend is enough to improve your mood, because sooner or later you will probably have a laugh.
Step 2. Go out and make friends
Go see a movie, have dinner out or go for a bike ride with friends or family. In addition to distracting you, social interaction will help you unwind for a few hours. Just talk to others (even have a frivolous chat) and a change of scenery to improve the mood.
If you are loner by nature, don't overdo socializing, as this can stress you out and cause even more anxiety. Prefer limited, low-key social interactions, such as running an errand, grocery shopping, or pedicure with a friend, rather than a long night out and about with a party
Step 3. Spend time with a pet
If you don't feel like socializing with other humans, you may want to snuggle up with your four-legged friend. Being in the company of an animal can fight sadness, because it allows you to satisfy a rather basic human need, that is to establish a bond and have a sense of closeness. Research has shown that spending time with dogs increases the concentration of endorphins, chemicals that interact with brain receptors to trigger positive feelings and improve mood.
Additionally, animals are particularly good at perceiving a person's mood through body movements and tone of voice, so they are often in tune with an individual's emotions
Step 4. Focus on others
Dedicating time and energy to others will not only help keep you busy, it will also give you a feeling of gratification and determination, allowing you to feel better about yourself and the situation you are facing.
- Look for a volunteer activity that you are passionate about, such as helping out in a homeless shelter or soup kitchen, taking care of stray dogs or taking them for a walk, helping out in a nursing home.
- Even doing little things for someone, like letting them walk past you at the supermarket checkout, can help you feel better. Acts of kindness stimulate well-being because they are concrete actions, not just thoughts.
