Here's what to do and say when you don't like her enough.
Steps
Step 1. Tell her as soon as possible that you are not interested
Don't put off the inevitable and don't give her the wrong impression.
Step 2. Do it in private, but choose a neutral location
If you want to tell him in person, do it in a place that you can easily walk away from - a public place that is not too crowded, like a park bench, or on an outdoor walk. DO NOT do it in your home, because it is increasingly difficult to send a person away, while if you are the one to walk away it will be better.
Step 3. Tell her quickly, and tell her the truth
It doesn't have to be a long conversation. Try saying something like, "Look, there's something I want to tell you. I'm flattered that you like me, and it makes me uncomfortable to do this, but I don't feel the same about you."
Step 4. Give her some time to take the hit, but don't explain "why" you're not interested
The truth is that the reasons don't matter, if you are not interested there is nothing you can do. Whatever you say could hurt her, and there's a chance it won't end well. Keep it simple "we're not meant to be together", or that she's a nice person but you don't want to have an affair with her.
Step 5. Offer your help
Hopefully, you haven't seen her in a very long time - most people do this when they realize they don't want to carry on a relationship. If there is a specific problem, maybe she got too attached to you too quickly, you might find a gentle way to tell her so she can help her in the future. Something like, "It was too much too fast for me." If he proposes to slow things down, stick to your position, "There are other reasons that are not important. What is important is that I don't want to start a relationship. Sorry, you are a beautiful person, but you are not the one. for me."
Step 6. Exit the scene
Don't stay too long. Once she has expressed her sadness or anger, tell her you need to go and wish her the best.
Step 7. Make a clean break
It is important to close down firmly and not say things that could delude her that she has a chance in the future. There are those who think this is a softer way to break the news, or to "sweeten the pill", but it is better to face reality. Women who are seriously in love will not lose hope and leave if you allow them to think that there is even the slightest chance. Cut cleanly - that's the best thing you can do.
Step 8. Always talk well about her with others, or don't talk about her at all
Gossiping or talking bad about another person never brings anything positive. If anyone asks questions, just say "it didn't work". If they tell you she has a beautiful new boyfriend and she looks really happy, reply, "That's great, I'm really happy for her."
Advice
- Remember that whatever you feel is normal and healthy. You don't have to save her from her sadness.
- Be clear and direct when you speak, but also be polite. Understand that her feelings may be deeper than yours, and allow her to be angry.
Warnings
- Don't use the "I don't want a relationship" excuse unless you're absolutely sure it's the truth! Nothing hurts more than a lie, and if you hook up with a girl after a couple of months she'll think you were dishonest.
- Don't try to console her by telling her that someday she will find the right person. Sure it will, but since you're downloading it you can't say it without sounding condescending.
- If she is very attached to you, it is best to tell her in a private place so if she gets angry there will be no public scenes.
- If she likes you, she will probably cry at least a little. Stay calm, and remember that telling her now is definitely BETTER than fooling her and wasting her time!
- If it starts haunting you, take precautions right away. Stalking - or subtly frightening a person - is considered a crime and therefore should not be taken lightly. Do what many stalking victims don't - call the police.
