Anger, stress, and anxiety are enough to upset anyone. While being able to control emotions sometimes seems like a possible feat, the reality is that you can learn to calm them down. Acquiring the ability to do this will allow you to better manage even the most unexpected situations and emotions. Read on and find out which are the physical and mental exercises that can teach you to find peace of mind and to overcome difficult situations.
Steps
Part 1 of 3: Calming the Body
Step 1. Practice diaphragmatic breathing
Start with a deep 5-second inhalation that allows you to effectively expand your abdomen. Hold the breath for 5 seconds, then exhale for another 5. Take a couple of normal breaths, then repeat the exercise until you begin to feel less anxious. Diaphragmatic breathing ensures that the air reaches even the lowest part of the lungs, and can be particularly useful in times when you feel it is difficult to breathe (generally in situations of anxiety, anger or stress).
Controlled breathing can indicate to the body that it is necessary to regain calm. In response, the body will release neurotransmitters that have the power to soothe you
Step 2. Be aware of your surroundings and your bodily sensations
Mindful attention can be used to quietly calm the mind by shifting the focus on your sensations and your surroundings. Start by focusing on sounds, temperature, smells and perceptions, as well as your breathing. Stay focused until you start to feel more relaxed. This practice will help calm your mind and, according to research, reduce stress, blood pressure, and chronic pain. As a result, you will gain more control over your emotions and become more aware.
The body responds to stronger emotions in a physical way, making you feel out of control. It secretes adrenaline and releases it into the bloodstream. Adrenaline increases your heart rate, muscle strength and blood pressure, preparing your body for the "fight or flight" reaction
Step 3. Relax your muscles gradually
Start by tensing and relaxing each of the muscle groups in succession, starting from the head up to the toes. Start by focusing on the muscles of your face, tense them for 6 seconds and then let them relax for another 6 seconds. Repeat with the muscles of the neck, shoulders, chest, arms, and so on, until the whole body feels more relaxed.
Progressive muscle relaxation can help you reduce muscle tension. As a result, anxiety and anger will be reduced allowing you to begin to regain your composure
Step 4. Exercise
If you feel anxious or angry, try to calm down with some exercise. Don't fall into the temptation to focus on the cause of your upset; move instead to be able to calm the body. When you do physical activity, your body releases endorphins that can reduce its stress response, improve your mood, reduce muscle tension and calm you down. Research has also shown that exercising can make changes in the brain, making you less susceptible to stress.
- Choose a physical activity that you enjoy. Maybe you love yoga, dancing, walking, team sport or running.
- Since there is no set time frame that will guarantee you will be able to calm down, when you feel upset simply start exercising. Continue until you feel the body begin to relax.
Step 5. Pamper your pet and, if possible, take him for a walk
In stressful times, cats and dogs can prove incredibly helpful. Just try petting your pet, talk to him or go outside together. One study showed that 55% of people who spend time with their pets are more relaxed, and that 44% also feel more optimistic.
Sometimes a stuffed animal can be a great help for anyone who does not own a real animal. Alternatively, head to the zoo, park, or visit an aquarium or nature reserve. Simply watching the animals go about their daily activities will help you feel calmer
Step 6. Eat healthily
Often, when you feel overwhelmed or upset, you tend to seek comfort in food. However, it is important to understand that a healthy and nutritious diet can help you regain balance and provide you with the energy you need to overcome difficult times. In addition to eating healthily, research suggests fighting stress and promoting relaxation by preferring the following foods:
- Asparagus.
- Avocado.
- Berries.
- Oranges.
- Oysters.
- Walnuts.
Step 7. Avoid those substances that prevent you from relaxing
Stimulants, such as caffeine, complicate the body's relaxation process and encourage central nervous system activity by making you feel more energetic. Likewise, learn not to rely on alcohol and nicotine to help calm you down. Nicotine, in particular, increases your heart rate and blood pressure, preventing you from entering a real state of relaxation. Being addicted to these substances will also make you even more anxious and stressed.
While alcohol has apparent calming effects, it prevents you from coping with your problems effectively and is by no means a good way to escape anxiety and stress
Part 2 of 3: Calming the Mind
Step 1. Distract yourself by engaging in an enjoyable or relaxing activity
Sometimes we insist on staying focused on what makes us anxious or angry - the things we have to do or what makes us upset. Ruminating prevents us from finding calm and constructively facing situations. So learn to distract yourself: moving your mind elsewhere, away from what is bothering you, can help you feel less stressed.
For example, try reading, doing photography, doing manual work, spending time with friends, dancing or watching a movie you like
Step 2. Talk to a friend
Expressing anger and anxiety will help calm you down and allow you to feel the importance of receiving support from others. Talking about what is troubling you will allow you not to feel alone anymore. In order for you to feel safe and accepted, it is important to nurture your social relationships and enjoy their support.
Talking can also help you improve your self-esteem, calm you down and distract you. Don't forget that a few laughs will help reduce stress even further
Step 3. Try to meditate
Sit down in a quiet place and take a comfortable position. Focus on your breathing and notice the thoughts that come to your mind. Let the worries appear and disappear without trying to hold them back. It is important to note that research states that meditating for as little as 30 minutes a day can change brain functions and behaviors. Also, in times of anger or anxiety it can help you feel more in control of your body and your emotions. By focusing on your breath and letting your thoughts appear and disappear, you will be able to calm both your body and mind. During meditation, it may be helpful to ask yourself the following questions to bring attention to the present moment:
- What do I notice by analyzing my breath?
- What do I notice by analyzing my thoughts instead? Am I able to let them appear and then disappear?
- Is my body under tension? Where am I holding back my anxiety?
Step 4. Count
Take a few deep breaths and start counting very slowly. Start by counting to 10, but continue further if you continue to feel angry. Focus on the ongoing count and not the situation that made you angry - it's a great way to learn to respond to anger rather than just react.
When you get angry, your body releases extra adrenaline. Counting gives your body a chance to counterbalance the adrenaline by preventing you from acting simply impulsive
Step 5. Keep a journal
Try to describe your emotions in detail. Journaling is a great way to learn about and manage your emotions, especially for those who are naturally inclined to write. Don't worry about writing grammatically correct, even a simple list of short phrases or words will do, the important thing is that you calm down in doing so. What matters is the process of thinking and recording your conflicts.
Thanks to your journal, you may be able to stop ruminating on the things that are troubling you. Once you have your problems and feelings written down, you can start creating a plan of action to overcome them
Step 6. Develop a positive mental attitude
Nurturing a mindset of joy can help you remember the good times and let go of the things you can't control. After realizing that you can't be in control of every situation, you can focus on managing your emotions. This step will help you retrace your steps and get rid of anger.
If you struggle to stay positive, pretend to be a calm and happy person. With practice and consistency, you will soon begin to really notice the bright side of things
Step 7. Create or find a relaxing place
Although different for each person, it is important for everyone to identify a place where they can relax whenever they start to feel overwhelmed by events. For example, you may want to take refuge in nature or spend some time observing or immersing yourself in the water to be able to improve your mood. Alternatively, you may be able to relax by surrounding yourself with people who can show you their respect and support. Instead, avoid spending too much time in contact with those who irritate you.
If possible, stay away from stressful situations. For example, if you know that mass social events make you anxious, consider making brief appearances or meeting only a few people at a time
Part 3 of 3: Getting Help
Step 1. Know when to get help from a doctor
If your attempt to calm your body and mind has not worked, you may want to consider seeing a professional. Pharmacological or therapeutic help can help you relieve chronic stress and worries that irritate you. If you have any of the following symptoms, it is advisable to see a doctor (these symptoms are attributable to generalized anxiety disorder):
- Your job, your social life or your relationship are put in jeopardy by your worries.
- You have the feeling that you cannot control your worries or that you cannot calm down.
- You can't relax or concentrate.
- You tend to avoid situations that might make you anxious.
- You have trouble sleeping.
- You constantly feel tense.
Step 2. Understand what CBT is
Most likely any mental health expert will advise you to continue self-help treatments, to be able to calm the mind and body through relaxation techniques. At the same time, however, you will most likely begin cognitive-behavioral therapy that will help you analyze what is making you anxious, stressed or worried. After shedding light on your behaviors, you can implement strategies to help you calm down. Thanks to CBT, you will learn to:
- Distinguish useful worries from unnecessary ones, and to accept and respond better to stress.
- Monitor what makes you nervous, what causes your anger, and how long it takes for you to calm down. This process will help you keep track of your progress.
- Breathe deeply and perform progressive muscle relaxation techniques.
- Change negative thoughts and reactions. As a result your mind will become calmer.
- Coping with situations that normally make you anxious, worried or terrified. As a result, you will feel that you control them better.
Step 3. Try medications
Therapy and self-help treatments are the methods by which it is usually advisable to try to find and remain calm. However, a mental health expert may find it helpful for you to take medication for a short time. Usually, the medications prescribed will be anxiolytics that will help calm you down. In the presence of a generalized anxiety disorder, the following are generally recommended:
- Buspirone (Buspar): non-sedating and non-addictive anxiolytic drug. It helps the patient manage anxiety, while not eliminating it completely.
- Benzodiazepines: fast-acting anxiolytic drugs, therefore useful on occasions when the patient is unable to calm down on their own. However, their frequent use can cause both physical and mental addiction - even after just a few weeks. For this reason they are usually only prescribed for the most severe cases of anxiety.
- Antidepressants: Used in long-term care as it takes up to 6 weeks for you to feel relief from anxiety. They can cause nausea and worsen sleep disturbances.
Advice
- Lack of sleep often makes every situation appear more dramatic than it actually is, so always try to provide your body and mind with the necessary rest.
- Try listening to relaxing music.
- To put an end to a fit of anger due to a small mistake you made, focus on what you learned from the situation, rather than the mistake you made, to prepare yourself to face the situation differently in the future.
- If you find that you are completely losing control of your emotions, seek professional help from an experienced psychologist.
- Close your eyes and imagine flowers blooming in front of you.
Warnings
- In the past, breathing into a paper bag was thought to help control hyperventilation and regain calm. Experts now agree that it is a dangerous practice that should be avoided. The only time you should breathe into a paper bag is when you feel dizzy from hyperventilation; Long breathing in a paper bag will force you to put carbon dioxide into your lungs, endangering your respiratory system.
- Never hurt others or yourself, even if you feel particularly angry. Get away from everyone and try to calm down. If you are unable to control yourself, consider getting help from a doctor, or go to the nearest emergency room immediately.
- Be careful not to take your anger out on others, otherwise you could get into trouble and hurt someone or yourself.
