Spending the night with an ex is risky behavior that can hurt, but it can also offer the thrill of hanging out with someone you dated. If you want to get back together with your ex it's one thing, but if you just want to sleep on it, it's a completely different game. To do this successfully, you need to be spontaneous, make sure you're on the same page, and have fun together without getting burned again. If you want to know how, follow these steps.
Steps
Method 1 of 3: Part 1: Prepare to Date Your Ex Girlfriend
Step 1. Maintain spontaneity
If you want to spend the night with your ex without too many ties and have as much fun as you can, then you have to be spontaneous. Don't call or text her to ask what she is doing. Rather, you should meet her at the club, at a party or on the street, and start wowing her and letting her know you want to go out.
If you call her or try to contact her all the time, she may get the wrong idea and think you want more than just going out. Act like it's a new and exciting girl you meet at the bar and take her home
Step 2. Allow enough time to pass
If you want to go out with your ex, you should at least wait until a couple of weeks, if not a few months, have passed since you broke up. Even if you have had a friendly and mutual breakup and there are no bad feelings between you, you need to make sure everything is okay before you get back in bed with your ex, or things could get significantly complicated.
- It takes some time before you go out with your ex, so that you can see her again as a beautiful girl to conquer, without getting caught up in your old and complicated feelings and emotions that may resurface upon seeing her again.
- You need to allow some time to pass in order to free yourself from anger, resentment, or repressed grudges.
Step 3. Let her know you want to go out with her
When enough time has passed and you meet your ex on the street, you should make it clear right away that you want to take her home. Don't tell her she's pretty and you miss her smile; instead, tell her she looks beautiful in her new dress and you missed her body. There is no need to go subtle, you should already be comfortable enough with each other - just make sure she feels the same way too.
- Don't make her sweet little bear eyes. Look at her from head to toe and let her know that you find her exciting.
- Be direct. Ask her to come to you or wait for her to invite you to her home.
Step 4. Make your intentions clear right away
Before you even touch her lips, make your intentions and expectations clear right away. Tell her you want to go out with her unattached, that you're not going to get back together, and that you just want to have some fun. Let her know that you are only interested in seeing her for fun and not to do all the romantic things of a couple, without many pleasantries.
Don't be cowardly. It is not honest behavior to woo your ex, go out with her, and only then let her know that you have no intention of rapprochement
Step 5. Make sure you both are on the same wavelength
Remember that when you want to date an ex, it's very unlikely that both of you are motivated by the same motivation. Most of the time one of them is still in pain and is still emotionally vulnerable after the breakup. It could be that she left you and you pretend you just want to sleep with her when you really want to get back together, or maybe the other way around, she's still lost while you just want to sleep with her. But if you both really want the same thing, you have the chance to have a nice evening together.
- Make eye contact as you explain the situation. Does he really agree or is it evident that he hopes that it can turn into something more?
- Think about how serious the relationship was in the beginning. If you've only been together for a month or two, you're most likely both more willing to have a chance meeting; very different if you have been dating for one or two years.
- Make sure you are both in favor of dating other people. If you aren't, then why not get back together?
Method 2 of 3: Part 2: Go to Bed with Your Ex Girlfriend
Step 1. Make sure you're "only" having sex
It may sound cynical, but if you just want to sleep with an ex, then you really should just sleep with her.
Be honest right away. Don't make excuses every time she asks you to go somewhere together. Make it clear that what you want is just sex
Step 2. Find yourself in moderation
Sleeping with your ex can be fun and exciting, but that doesn't mean you should do it every night, or else you know what? It will start to feel like a relationship. If you are only dating your ex you will miss out on meeting other girls or having fun in a different way. The more time you spend together, the more likely it is that one of you will be injured; so keep it fun and spontaneous without making it a daily habit.
Maintain a fun and spontaneous relationship. If you meet her outside, take her home. Otherwise, don't call or text her to ask where she is. You shouldn't care much, remember?
Step 3. Don't get used to it too much
It can be difficult to sleep with an ex without getting too comfortable.
No pampering or passionate kisses when you say goodbye, no walking around the house in your underwear eating chips or ice cream left over from the night before. All these signs show that you are getting too comfortable in the non-relationship and that you are entering the serious relationship phase again
Step 4. Stay in control
If you want to sleep with your ex without problems, then you need to stay in control of the situation at all times. Don't let her set the terms of your relationship, rather leave things in her house so that it is clear that you are in control. Don't cancel your plans with friends if she wants to see you; tell her that in case you will call her later if she waits for you.
This doesn't mean you have to tell her exactly what to do; you should find a time and space that suits both of you, but you don't have to fall prey to his needs
Step 5. Keep your new relationship private
Don't go out with your ex in front of your friends, don't go to a party with her because she doesn't want to go alone, and don't tell your friends what you're up to. The more people learn about it, the more complicated it gets, while you have to try to keep it as simple as possible - just between you.
- If you start dating her in public and hanging out with her friends, they will immediately disapprove and convince your ex that she must be setting the terms of your relationship.
- If you take her out with your friends, she will feel like your girlfriend.
Step 6. Avoid affectionate affection when in bed
When dating a woman you can be tender, tell her how beautiful she is, how much you love her and how much you like those little moles on her cheek. Well, these Romeo moves don't have to happen in your relationship, or she'll get the wrong idea. She'll think "She said I'm beautiful - she still has to love me", or "She ran her hands through my hair - it must mean something!" Doing so will make her believe you want something more serious.
You can tell her how sexy she is and how much you like her body, but stay sexual - not tender - if you want it to work
Method 3 of 3: Part 3: Knowing When to Stop Sleeping with Your Ex
Step 1. Stop if either of you starts having feelings again
Unfortunately, it will be difficult to continue sleeping with your ex without one of you developing feelings for the other again. As soon as this happens, you will have to press the eject button to get out of the non-relationship, or things will get even worse. Unless you're really still in love with your ex and are using these techniques to win her back - by the way, a bad idea - you should stop and desist as soon as she starts showing the first signs of feeling something.
- If you start to feel that pain in your chest and think about the wonderful relationship you were having even though you knew it didn't work out, then it's time to leave.
- If your ex tells you she misses you, sends you sweet (not sexy) messages, or tells you she'd love to be able to do couple things together, then it's time to leave.
- If you have to end the "relationship" for this reason, explain yourself well with her. You shouldn't treat her badly just because it's over.
Step 2. Stop if one of you starts to like someone else
If one of you begins to have feelings for someone else, even if you are not fully involved, you should stop your night visiting period right away. Sleeping with your ex is fine when both of you want some action and are bored because you have few romantic opportunities in your lives. But if either of you starts to get attached to someone else, it's time to stop and make room for new feelings towards the third person.
- If you know your ex has a crush on someone else, you are doing her harm by continuing to see her and occupy her time.
- If you like another girl, she won't want to know about you if she learns about your intrigue with your ex.
Step 3. Stop when you fall into the routine
Sleeping with your ex will last a month or two, before things start to get more serious. Even if you both try to keep relationships as casual as possible, if you pick up a certain pace it will practically feel like you are in a relationship; if you know exactly when you will meet next time, something is wrong. Time to stop. If you know when you're going to see your ex next time and you no longer feel the thrill of spending the night with her, the fun is over.
You can't expect to sleep with your ex for more than a month or two without her becoming something more. Be realistic
Step 4. Stop immediately if you start arguing as a couple
As soon as you start arguing again, you should stop seeing each other. If you're not actually dating, there's no reason you should fight. Is simple. If he says "Where is this taking us?" or "What does this all mean?", she is already in "girlfriend" mode and your sex session has gone too far. You shouldn't be fighting about anything, because you're just having casual sex, right?
It might be tempting to argue with your ex again if you're used to it, but remember that it gets you nowhere, except where you were before - a bad relationship
Step 5. Stop immediately if you are not having fun anymore
The point of having sex with your ex is that you both want to have some fun, have some sexual pleasure without being tied up. If you don't feel these pleasures anymore, if you feel it like an obligation, or if you see your ex just because you're bored, then it's time to find someone else. You didn't have fun before and that's why the relationship ended.
Be honest about the end of the relationship. Don't avoid or just ignore your ex. Let her know it's time to move on
Advice
- Be fun.
- Be comfortable and make sure she is too.
- Take your time.
Warnings
- If you are with her 24 hours a day, she will be bored (even in a real relationship).
- Give her her space or she'll push you away.
