It used to be considered taboo, but today asking people out via text is an increasingly common practice. While you will always feel nervous when you have to take the first step with someone you like, speaking via text will give you the opportunity to think about what to say and choose the right words. By following a few simple tips you can make the conversation smooth, natural, and with a little luck, you will get the other person to say yes.
Steps
Method 1 of 4: Ask the person you like out to date
Step 1. Stay focused on your goal
Texting the person you like about how their day went or their interests is a great way to show them that you want to get to know them better. Just make sure the conversation doesn't get trivial, generic, and don't make her wait too long before you ask her out. The earlier you make your proposal, the more likely you are to get their full attention and get a positive response.
If you want to ask her to do something specific, move the discussion topic to that. For example, if you want to take her to the cinema, tell her about one of the newly released movies
Step 2. Ask her out with a compliment
When you invite her on a date, include a polite appreciation explaining why you want to go out with her. This will make her happier and lead her to open up to the idea of a meeting. Here are some ideas:
- "I really like talking to you. Would you like to have a coffee together sometime?";
- "I've been wondering for a few days if you'd like to go to the cinema with me.";
- "You look really great, would you like to have dinner together?".
Step 3. Be specific when inviting her to go out with you
Make sure she understands this is a date, or she might think you're just inviting her for a night out with friends. Use clear phrases like "Would you like to go out with me" instead of a vague "Would you like to see us?".
Step 4. Decide the details of the appointment
If you get a yes, think about the organization right away. Find a day and time that suits both of you, then decide where to meet. Establish a concrete schedule before ending the message conversation. This way, you show the person you like that they care about you and avoid possible misunderstandings in the future.
Step 5. Don't worry if you get a no
Give the other person some space and after a few weeks talk to them again as a friend. If the conversation goes well, you may still have some chance of winning her over. In the meantime, be sure to think about yourself by hanging out with friends, getting out of the house, and staying active.
Method 2 of 4: Text Talk to the Person You Like
Step 1. Write her personal messages
Avoid generic phrases like "Hey", "How's it going?" or "What are you doing?" because they are not ideal for starting a conversation. Instead, try to write something specific to her. This allows you to impress her and shows her that you care about her unique characteristics.
- Try referencing the last conversation you had. For example, if she told you about an important exam or work project, ask her how it went.
- Talk to her about her interests. If you know she's a fan of a band, ask her a question about the latest album that came out. If she's cheering on a team, tell her about the last game.
Step 2. Talk about cheerful topics
With your messages, try to make the person you like him understand that you are a funny type. Keep the conversation focused on pleasant topics and don't hesitate to write a joke or two. Remember that irony and sarcasm are difficult to interpret via text, so clearly explain when you joke by adding an emoji or an expression like "haha" or "lol".
If you don't know for sure that the other person appreciates them, avoid jokes that are too bad. Even if it's not your intention, comments and jokes that are too vulgar can make some people uncomfortable or make them feel nervous
Step 3. Take care of your spelling and grammar
There is no need to write elaborate paragraphs when texting, but you are more likely to get a yes to an invitation to go out if your proposal is worded using correct grammar. Double-check your message before sending it to make sure it doesn't contain any obvious errors.
Step 4. Give her time to respond
If she hasn't told you anything, don't mess with her. She may be busy or thinking what to say and will feel overwhelmed if she receives dozens of text messages. If you don't get a response after a day or two, you can try to make yourself heard again. If she still doesn't answer you, she probably doesn't care.
Step 5. Try to send the other person messages that are as long as they write to you
You don't have to stifle her, so show her a level of enthusiasm comparable to hers. Replying with three long messages to every short text message you receive makes you seem too impatient. On the contrary, he tries to imitate his way of writing.
Method 3 of 4: Choose the Right Time to Send Messages
Step 1. Don't wait too long to write to the person you like
If you've just met a girl you've gotten along well with, don't wait before texting her. The old rule of waiting three days before contacting someone who has hit you is a myth. Write them within 24 hours, so that the funny moments spent together are still a vivid memory in his mind.
- Even if you've known her for a long time, in case you've had a great time together or had a great conversation, don't wait to write to her - let her know how much you enjoyed being with her.
- Your first message can be as simple as this: "I just wanted to tell you that I really enjoyed talking to you today."
Step 2. Write them at reasonable times
Don't do this early in the morning or late at night, as you don't want to risk waking her up. The best times are usually the late afternoon or early evening, when she will likely be awake and finished working or doing her homework.
Step 3. Wait a couple of hours to respond after the other person replies
When replying to your messages, don't text them right away or you will seem too impatient. However, don't wait too long or you will appear rude or uninterested.
In general, you should expect to only reply to the first message. If you keep keeping the other person waiting, they may become impatient or question your interest in them
Method 4 of 4: What to Do on the First Date
Step 1. Let her know you can't wait to meet her
Don't bombard her with messages, but a day or two before your appointment, write her that you are looking forward to that moment. This will let her know that you are as excited about your meeting as she is (hopefully).
Step 2. Wear clothes that fit you well and are appropriate for the occasion
Before your appointment, choose nice clothing, suitable for what you are going to do. If you're not going to meet in a fancy restaurant or gala, you probably don't need to wear a suit or evening dress. Instead, choose clothes that are comfortable, fit and fit you well to show that you care about your appearance.
Step 3. Give your attention to the person you like
During your appointment, turn off your phone and focus on her. Just think about the time you spend together and avoid talking about conflicts at work or school, past relationships, or other unpleasant topics. Show her that you care by listening to what she says and responding intelligently.
Step 4. Let her know that you enjoyed going out with her
If you enjoyed it and would like to see her again, let her know. Write to her the same evening or the next day, telling her that you got on well with her. If she answers the same way, ask her if she'd like to see you again in a few days.
Advice
- If possible, try to figure out if the person you like is interested in you or is in a relationship with someone else.
- Once you have become friends with her, ask her out and if she says no, you can say "No problem, it was just an idea".
