Sometimes you may think that you will never meet a good guy. Don't worry, you are not the only one! It's a feeling that almost everyone has at least once in their life. If you don't feel confident in your body, finding a flame may seem like an even more frustrating undertaking. The most important thing is to know how you can gain confidence in yourself. When you like yourself, others are more likely to notice all your strengths. Also try to find a way to get to know someone and turn dating into a relationship. Whether you are a teenager or an adult, you have the opportunity to improve your love life by following the methods described in this article. Just remember that the key to succeeding is to maintain a positive attitude!
Steps
Part 1 of 3: Nurturing Self-Confidence
Step 1. Think positively
Searching for the right person can be frustrating, anxious, or even gloomy. This is completely normal, but these kinds of thoughts won't help you find a boyfriend. Change your perspective to focus on something more positive.
- Don't be swayed by negative considerations. If you start thinking that you will never know anyone, stop. Replace this thought by saying, "I am proud of myself for all the effort I am putting in."
- Try keeping a gratitude journal. Set aside 5-10 minutes a day to write down everything you are grateful for. This way you will be able to reflect on the positive aspects of your life.
- For example, you could write: "I am grateful that I received a part in the school play with my best friend" or "I am happy for the trust and respect my parents give me."
Step 2. Focus on your strengths
Take some time each day to reflect on what you value most about yourself. You can choose all the qualities you like! Give yourself some compliments out loud or try writing them down.
- For example, you might look in the mirror and say to yourself, "You have a wonderful smile!"
- You could leave a note on your laptop that says, "You write flawlessly!".
- Try hanging a note on the closet that you remember: "You sing in a divine way!".
Step 3. Achieve your goals
It's a great way to build your confidence. First, set specific goals. Remember to include both long-term goals and those to be achieved immediately. Then come up with a plan to reach them all.
- A short-term goal might be: "Avoid eating out for a week." You can achieve this by planning your meals and preparing lunch to take to work.
- A long-term goal could be: "Receive a promotion within one year". Write down precisely how you can accomplish this, perhaps by taking on more responsibilities at work.
- For example, try to establish: "Make the most of all subjects this term" or "Follow an extracurricular activity."
- Whenever you are able to cross the achieved goals off your list, you will have a nice boost of confidence!
Step 4. Build a positive body image
In today's society it is very easy to feel overweight. It's not easy to feel good about yourself when you're constantly bombarded with images of overly skinny celebrities. Try to remember that most of the time these photos are retouched, and those that aren't often don't make a realistic goal for most people.
- Keep in mind that everyone is different physically, in terms of height, build and metabolism.
- Think about everything you like about your body. For example: "I'm glad I have legs that are so strong that they allow me to go on long hikes."
- Cast out the negativity. Don't listen to unpleasant comments or considerations that physically mortify others.
- Find an example of femininity with a genuine and balanced look. It could be anyone, from your mother to Amy Schumer.
Step 5. Take care of your appearance
Sometimes it is possible to fuel your self-confidence by doing everything to improve your outward appearance. Try every day to find time to make yourself beautiful and be taken care of. It will be a moment that will help you lift your mood!
- Choose clothes that make you feel more confident. Do you feel better with jewel colors? Find a cool ruby red sweater to wear to work.
- Try a new haircut. Have you always wanted to have shorter hair? Do not hesitate! By experimenting with new looks, you will have a great time and can feel great.
- Enhance your smile. A dazzling smile is the perfect accessory for everyone. Try using some whitening strips to make it brighter.
- Don't worry about being trendy. Perhaps the latest trend in school is wearing high-waisted jeans. They don't necessarily suit everyone, so don't worry about it. Dress according to your shapes.
- Ask a friend for advice. You can tell her, "Do you think this fitted sweater fits me?". Accept his comment.
Step 6. Play sports to improve your mood
If you don't feel confident in your body, you will probably be afraid of joining the gym. However, keep in mind that exercise can actually lift the mood. Sweating helps you feel good about yourself and increase your energy.
- Make an appointment with a coach. Many gyms offer the chance to test with one of their professionals. Ask for suggestions on the activities and workouts that best suit your needs.
- Try a fitness class. Find a friend to work out with and take a spinning or aerobics class.
- Train outdoors. Exercise outdoors can allow you to breathe fresh air, get some sunshine and, at the same time, improve your mood.
- Be part of a team. Introduce yourself to the selections of a football or volleyball team.
Part 2 of 3: Knowing a Good Guy
Step 1. Make a list of your priorities
To find a boyfriend, you need to know a guy to date. Before you go looking for someone, take a few minutes to think about what you want. List the priorities you want in a potential mate.
- Perhaps the sharing of interests is one of the requirements you consider most important in a relationship. For example, do you like cycling? Give importance to this aspect by finding a guy to share this passion with.
- Also try to list other important character aspects: honesty, understanding, a sense of humor - these are all great examples.
Step 2. Use your social contacts
Friends and family are a great asset in finding a boyfriend. In fact, almost everyone says they met their partner with the help of friends and relatives. Let your network know that you are open to meeting new people.
- You can say: "You know, Sara, I would like to meet someone. Do you know any guy who might interest me?".
- Try saying, "Alessia, that guy you share the desk with in the English class seems really nice. In any conversation can you mention my name and see if he seems interested?".
- Accept the invitations you receive. You never know if someone will happen to you at a barbecue organized in your aunt's country house!
- If you are looking to develop a positive body image, it may be easier to meet new people by taking advantage of your knowledge. After all, your best friend is unlikely to introduce you to someone who makes inappropriate comments about your appearance.
Step 3. Use technology
Nowadays, a large percentage of relationships are born online. Forget the old prejudices! Use technology to your advantage and get involved to meet the man of your dreams, or go out with someone just for fun!
- Online dating is also a great way to let go if you feel physically insecure. Usually, it is necessary to post a photo that is needed for a potential suitor to see (and accept) your appearance.
- Always be honest about your profile. For example, don't post photos from 10 years ago.
- Be cautious when meeting someone online. Don't give out personal information, such as your home address or where you work.
- The most reputable dating sites don't allow teenagers to sign up. Not a problem, you can still use technology to your advantage.
- Write a smart Instagram post and tag the person you like. You could also post cute photos on Snapchat and exchange them with a group of friends, including the guy you're interested in. Try to get his attention!
Step 4. Be expansive
When you know someone, just think about chatting with them. This way you will be able to put aside all the problems regarding your weight. Rather, when you see a cute guy at a party, practice your communication skills and go out of your way to connect with him.
- Be cheerful. Avoid the most depressing or controversial topics the first time you meet someone.
- Don't be afraid to take the initiative. If you are at a party, casually approach someone and say, "I don't think we've ever seen each other. Are you Sara's friend?"
Step 5. Be ready to meet someone
It's nice to have a plan and to rely on your knowledge, but you can meet a guy pretty much anywhere. By keeping your eyes open in normal everyday situations, you will learn to seize new opportunities almost everywhere. Don't be afraid to strike up a conversation in the following places:
- At the supermarket: "I love hummus. Do you think this guy is tasty?";
- In the airport lounge: "Are you traveling for business or pleasure?";
- At the bar: "I've never seen you here before. You must have the same caffeine addiction as me";
- The school is the perfect place to meet new people. Diversify your activities: for example, offer your contribution to the school newspaper so that you can meet various types of kids.
Part 3 of 3: Establishing a fulfilling relationship
Step 1. Try to have reasonable expectations
When you know someone, don't expect the relationship to immediately turn into something serious. Be patient. Make sure everyone has time to get to know each other.
- If you feel uncomfortable about your weight, you should feel free to talk about it. For example, you might say, "No, thank you. I don't feel like sharing dessert. I'm trying to eat healthily."
- Don't forget to be yourself and remember that the guy you like is around because he's interested in you.
Step 2. Build a bond
As you deepen your knowledge, take the time to understand your affinities. Don't be afraid to share what you like and what you hate. For example, you might say, "I love horror movies. Would you like to see some with me next Friday?"
Plan something to do together. It's a great way to bond. Try something new together, like a dance or cooking class. By learning to do something, you will also be able to increase your confidence
Step 3. Think about having fun
During the early stages of dating, try not to take things too seriously. Fun is an essential element in any healthy relationship. If you're not having fun with your boyfriend or if he makes you question yourself, maybe it's time to reconsider your relationship.
- Laugh together. Go see a cabaret show or watch comedy videos on YouTube.
- Show him that you like to play. If you go to a playground, don't be afraid to take a swing on the swing.
Step 4. Communicate effectively
Communication is a fundamental element in any relationship. To build a relationship, try to express yourself effectively. Don't be afraid to share how you feel.
- For example, you might say, "I don't really want to spend the day in the pool. I feel a little insecure these days, but I'm working on that. Can we find another way to spend the afternoon together?"
- Be direct, honest and respectful.
Advice
- Be yourself.
- Be patient. Building a stable relationship takes time.
- Enjoy your life. Have fun meeting new people and trying new things.
