Bedwetting (the medical definition is "bedwetting") is a fairly common ailment that affects people of all ages. In some cases, a possible solution is to wear a diaper at night. However, many older children and adolescents who suffer from it strongly oppose it. In fact, some feel treated like children by their parents. In this situation, it is quite difficult to get them to protect themselves. Several methods can help you encourage and motivate a child who is ashamed of putting on a diaper to keep his problem under control.
Steps
Part 1 of 3: Communicate Effectively
Step 1. Explain to him the reason for your decision
As a parent, you know you have a certain responsibility. However, as your child grows, he will be more and more interested in understanding why certain decisions are made for him. Take him aside and explain to him why you have determined that he should wear a diaper.
- Use words that the kid can understand. If you need to explain your decision in medical terms, try to make it understandable. For example, you might say, "Since you have a hard time peeing before bed? The diaper is one of the solutions we will try for this problem."
- Explain that it is important for him to get enough sleep at his age. Bringing protection to bed will allow him to rest, as he won't have to get up in the middle of the night to change the sheets.
Step 2. Emphasize that you made this decision for his sake, which is not punishment
You might say, "I know you don't want to wear a diaper, but I'm afraid this problem is preventing you from sleeping well. So I decided to try the diaper solution for a while. Let's see how it goes."
Explain that people of all ages (including many adults) wet the bed and that someone has to wear a diaper for life. Obviously it would be better to fix the underlying problem rather than just dealing with the symptoms, but there are cases where you need to constantly use the diaper. If this is your child's situation, reassure him that everything will be fine. Nothing is more effective than a diaper to control severe incontinence, such as the one that causes bedwetting, and it also guarantees comfort and hygiene
Step 3. If your child is the right age, explain the medical consequences
This step is only applicable with teenagers who are able to understand certain aspects of the matter. Explain them this way: if she doesn't use protection, skin problems can occur, not to mention that sleeping between wet sheets is really uncomfortable.
- Two other risks associated with incontinence are bacterial overgrowth and infections. When episodes of nocturnal enuresis occur, the skin surface comes into contact with the bacteria contained in the urine.
- Ammonia is a caustic substance contained in urine. It increases the skin's pH, causing irritation. It is also used by bacteria for food, contributing to the reproduction of other microorganisms.
- Episodes of nocturnal enuresis favor the creation of a humid and warm environment, ideal for the proliferation of pathogenic fungi.
Step 4. Listen to her concerns
If your child is old enough to object, then chances are he has his reasons. Maybe he feels ashamed or embarrassed, or the diapers are uncomfortable. Whatever the problem is, make sure you take it seriously.
- To show that you listen to him, it is effective to use paraphrases. For example, you might say, "I understand your fear. You're afraid your brother will make fun of you about it."
- Ask questions related to the matter. Try asking him, "What could we do to improve the situation?"
Step 5. Don't ignore his feelings
When you address the issue, your child will likely experience different emotions. It is quite normal to feel frustration, anger and embarrassment in such a situation. Listen carefully and make sure you have an empathetic approach.
- If he feels embarrassed, try to reassure him by telling him that this is a very common problem. Explain that his emotions are fair and understandable. You can tell him, "I understand how you feel. I've had awkward moments in my life too."
- The kid needs to know that you don't make him put on a diaper to punish or humiliate him.
- Emphasize that he must only wear it at night and the only ones who will know will be family members.
Step 6. Support him
You can verbally support him in several ways. Try to steer the conversation towards the problem rather than focusing attention on the person. This will help you deal with the issue without causing him to get defensive.
- Example of a person-oriented sentence: "You wet the bed too often." This can make him feel guilty. Instead, try a problem-oriented phrase, such as "Bedwetting can be quite uncomfortable for someone with bedwetting." In this way he will know that you understand him, he will realize that the problem does not fall solely on his shoulders and that he is not alone.
- Make statements that support him, such as, "I'm glad you want to discuss this with me. I really appreciate the fact that you are a mature and honest kid."
Part 2 of 3: Devise a Plan
Step 1. Identify the cause
If your child has managed to overcome bedwetting in the past and the disorder has recently reappeared, the situation needs to be addressed. If a child has turned five and the episodes are repeated more than twice a week, many experts agree that this is a problem. The first step in finding a solution is to look for the cause. Make an appointment with your pediatrician to discuss the problem.
- Bedwetting can have many common physiological causes. One of the most common is called delayed maturation of the bladder sphincter. In practice, the baby's bladder did not develop at the same rate as the rest of the body.
- Furthermore, it is possible that the antidiuretic hormone (ADH) is not normal. Vasopressin prevents the body from producing urine. According to some studies, children with low values often suffer from bedwetting.
- Ask your doctor to do some tests to determine the cause of the problem. Make sure he clearly understands your concerns.
Step 2. Consider the alternatives
If the test results do not reveal physiological causes, you should consider psychological ones. According to experts, if a baby hasn't wet the bed for more than six months and the problem returns, it may be due to stress or anxiety. If you think your child is stressed or suffering from anxiety, start looking at the underlying causes.
- Consider if your child has been going through any major changes lately. For example, have you moved? Was there a death in the family? A divorce? All of these factors can cause stress or anxiety.
- Try having deep conversations with your child. You can ask him questions to try to figure out if there are any problems you are not aware of. Try asking him, "How is school going? You haven't told me a lot about the teachers lately." Then, you can use this information to try to determine if she has psychological problems.
Step 3. Consider the various treatments
Once you understand the cause of bedwetting, you can start looking into different therapies. If the diagnosis is physiological in nature, the doctor may suggest several treatments. Ask him to explain to you what the accuracy consists of.
- Taking medicines can be a solution. There are several medications that can treat the causes of bedwetting. Two of the most popular are desmopressin acetate and imipramine. The pediatrician will give you more detailed information.
- If the causes are psychological, you may want to take him to a psychotherapist. A professional can help him cope with anxiety and depression.
Step 4. Try using an incentive system to encourage the kid
If your pediatrician thinks that wearing a diaper is your best bet, you may want to use temporary rewards to encourage your baby to be consistent. At first, explain that this is a short-term solution that will help him until he gets used to the diapers.
- You might say, "We know this embarrasses you a little and we understand you, but we've come up with an idea to make it fun. We'll use an incentive system. If you do your homework, not only will you get a reward, but you will also a favor to yourself ".
- Ask the kid to choose three things he really likes. For example, maybe he loves video games, books and toys, in that order. If he wears the diaper for 20-24 consecutive days, he will get a toy. If he does this for 25-29 nights, he will receive a book. If he does it all month, he'll have a video game. The purpose of implementing this system is to gradually get used to wearing the diaper.
- Verbal encouragement is also important for this system to be successful. Praise him, encourage him and reassure him in the face of obstacles. If it's big enough, focus on the final goal rather than temporary rewards. The real purpose is to help him feel good and cultivate good long-term personal hygiene. You can tell him, "We are very proud of you. You understand exactly why you should wear a diaper. We know this is not fun, but remember that people of all ages use it because of bedwetting. It is much more comfortable to put it on than to wake up with the pajamas and the sheets soaked, right? ".
Step 5. Teach him to use the diaper himself
If you are able, it is important that you take care of your personal hygiene safely and independently. Obviously there will be variations depending on his age. A baby must learn to care for it on his own from an early age, so that wearing a diaper is not a cause for embarrassment or shame. Unless he has cognitive and / or motor disabilities that prevent him, he should be responsible for putting on the diaper and changing it himself.
Part 3 of 3: Asking for Help
Step 1. Talk to someone
If your child is suffering from bedwetting, this situation is probably quite frustrating for both you and him. You may have found that you need help finding an effective way to manage it. If convincing him to wear a diaper is troubling you, maybe someone else can help you deal with such a sensitive conversation.
- Is there a family member that your child has a good relationship with? Do you have a special connection with an aunt, uncle or cousin? Ask this person to help you get through the conversation.
- Talk to friends and family who have children. If they have experience with this type of situation, they can probably give you great advice.
Step 2. Consider online self-help groups dedicated to incontinence
They can be a good reference point to talk about different issues associated with the problem, from how to get used to the use of diapers to how to choose between the various brands. Suggest that your child reach out to these groups to deal with people who have the same problem. If it's small, check it out while surfing the internet.
Step 3. Consult your pediatrician
It can be of great help to you in such a situation. Not only can it help you understand the physiological causes, it can also suggest how to deal with the problem with your child. Remember that your doctor has seen similar cases in the past and is thoroughly familiar with the disorder.
Prepare for the medical examination. Make a list of questions to ask the doctor. This will help you remember everything you want to ask
Step 4. Look for a support network
Remember to be understanding with yourself. You too are facing a difficult situation. Surround yourself with people who have a positive impact on your life and who can support you.
Try talking to a close friend you trust. Explain that you are dealing with a sensitive issue with your child and that you need to let off steam to someone. When a person listens to you, this can help you relieve the stress caused by the situation
Advice
- If you use cloth nappies, you must cover them with waterproof (plasticized) briefs.
- Some use both disposable and tissue diapers to manage bedwetting. For example, cloth diapers and plastic briefs can be uncomfortable during the hottest times of the year, such as spring and summer, so switching to disposable ones is preferable.
