And so you've reached that point in your relationship where you want to take it to the next level. Some people think sex is a big deal, but others see it as something they just want to share with someone really special. While you should never force your girlfriend to have sex with you, you can always soothe some of her fears and reassure her that you really are someone she can fully trust. After doing this, sex comes natural.
Steps
Part 1 of 3: Building his Trust
Step 1. Try to be trustworthy
If you want your girlfriend to want to have sex with you, then you should prove yourself incredibly trustworthy. Whether it's her first time or she's already had sex, she needs to feel like she can trust you. She may fear that after having sex, you may leave her because you have got what you wanted. That's why you have to prove her wrong by making yourself recognized as an honest and trustworthy guy.
- Show up on time. If you're always half an hour late for appointments, she'll think you don't think she's that special and she'll be less likely to have sex with you.
- Don't be stupid. If you say you plan to take her to the beach over the weekend, do it. If you don't keep your word, she won't be able to trust you.
- Be his rock. Let her talk about her problems and insecurities knowing you can make her feel better.
- Don't let hours or even a day or two go by without answering his phone calls and messages. This would make her feel like she can't trust you.
Step 2. Give it time
Some guys may be ready to have sex with a girl in no time, while some girls may take months or even longer to decide they're ready to make love. And some girls - sorry, gentlemen … - are really adamant about waiting for "the right one" and don't even want to have sex before marriage. So, don't rush… - wait before the girl trusts you.
- If your girlfriend is barely attracted to kissing, then you shouldn't try to have more intimate relationships for a while.
- However, if you and your girlfriend are already willing to go to bed after a few weeks, then you can start thinking about taking her to the next level.
- If you want your girlfriend to want to have sex with you, the worst thing you can do is try to force her when it's too early. This will turn off any desire for your girlfriend, who will be much less likely to sleep with you.
Step 3. Don't act like you're obsessed with sex
Let's face it … - if you are a man of a certain age who is desperate for his girlfriend to have sex with him, then you are probably "obsessed" with sex. But that doesn't mean you have to make jokes, hints or even blatant references to sex all the time. The last thing you want is for your girlfriend to think you are such a sex obsessed maniac that you go with everyone indiscriminately. You should make her feel special, like you want 'just her'.
- You don't have to hide that you are a man with needs, but you should avoid being vulgar and talking about sex or other people having sex all the time.
- Don't comment on other women. You would make your girlfriend feel like she is a piece of meat. Remember that you are not with your brother, but with your special woman.
Step 4. Try to be fair
If you want your girlfriend to trust you, then you need to be faithful to her. She will never have sex with you if she thinks you are talking, flirting or even dating other women. While you don't have to be rude or ignore the others, you should focus on your girlfriend so that she knows you're there for her, especially after you start having sex.
- You spend a lot of time with her. Make sure you go out at least once or twice a week and make sure you hear her at least once a day if you don't live together.
- There is a difference between being loyal and being possessive and smothering your girlfriend with affection. You should learn to see each other when you both want to go out, but don't try to see her 24/7 all week or she'll start to pull back.
- You should show your girlfriend that you are not only loyal to her, but that you are also a loyal brother, friend, and teammate. Show loyalty in many aspects of your life and your girlfriend will be impressed.
Part 2 of 3: Treat Her Right
Step 1. Treat her like a lady
If you want your girlfriend to have sex with you, then you should treat her like a lady, not just someone to pick up. To do this, you must be a courteous, understanding and generally admirable gentleman. Keep her doors open, hand her coat when it's cold, move her chairs, and help her carry her heavy bags.
- Be sure to compliment her to let her know how beautiful or special she is.
- It is important to be a gentleman, but try not to do anything that feels too unnatural or she will realize that you are not yourself.
Step 2. Clean the house
This may sound silly, but if you want your girlfriend to feel really special, you shouldn't invite her home, if it looks like a battleground. You must first make sure you pick up any dirty clothing off the floor, clean the tables, and make your bed look and smell as clean and inviting as possible.
- Not only will this make your lady feel special, it will make her more inclined to have sex with you. She won't want to go on if the bed is covered in candy wrappers and dirty underwear.
- If you carry it around often, you also need to keep the car clean. Give your lady the respect she deserves by making sure she has a clean seat.
Step 3. Show interest in her whole person - not just her body
Your girlfriend's biggest fear may be that you are not caring about her mind at all because you are too obsessed with her body. You must therefore prove her wrong. Show her that you know her as a person, that you know her hopes, her dreams and what she is passionate about.
- Ask her about her friendships, childhood, and favorite experiences.
- Show her that you appreciate her opinion. Ask her what she thinks about the current political situation in your state or your new look.
- Make eye contact when you talk to her. Show her that everything she says is important to you.
Step 4. Take her out for romantic dates
If you want some sexual tension, you need to create romance first. Make her feel special by taking her out, dressing up, and finding a romantic spot for dinner, a drink, or even just stargazing. You don't have to do anything mundane or out of your way to make her feel special.
- While you may enjoy baseball games, birthday parties, or a loud, sweaty concert, these events are often not conducive to making love.
- Doing something romantic once in a while will show your woman that she really matters to you.
Step 5. Be concerned about his needs
If you don't pay attention to your woman's daily needs, then how are you going to do it even in bed? Your girlfriend needs to understand what you feel when she's sad, nervous, anxious, or just plain cold or hungry. Pay attention to her eyes, her body language, and her words to know if anything is bothering her. If you act completely unaware that she is visibly upset about something, then she will think that you are not really paying attention to her.
If something is wrong, don't be afraid to ask what happens. This will show her that you care
Step 6. Make sure she is ready for sex
If you really want to treat your girlfriend right, then you need to get an idea of whether or not she is ready for sex. If you are her first boyfriend, if she is sexually inexperienced or deeply religious, or has other moral beliefs that she doesn't want to have sex, then you should back off and wait for her to trust you enough to consider having sex with you. Anyway, here are some ways to know if she wants to have sex with you:
- If things get hot and unmistakable in the matter of physical relationships, then she may be ready to move on.
- If she talks to you about sex, gives you sexual compliments, and touches you a lot more, then she may be ready for sex.
- If she hints at you wanting to sleep with you, spends a lot of time on or near your bed, or invites you late at night, then she may be ready for more intimacy.
- If she has deep moral or religious beliefs that are conditioning her not to want to have sex, don't try to force her. Accept that 'some' girls will never have sex until they are married and that there is nothing you can do to change that.
Part 3 of 3: Turn her on
Step 1. Be prepared
If you are going to try to have sex or even talk about sex with your girlfriend, then you should be ready with some condoms in case she is well disposed. This doesn't mean you should make her feel uncomfortable or show her condoms, but it does mean that you should have a supply in case things go in a favorable direction.
If she wants to have sex and you have to run to the pharmacy to get some condoms, this can make your first sexual experience mundane
Step 2. Create the right mood
If you want your girlfriend to have sex with you, then you need to create the favorable mood. You should start the evening by doing something romantic to soften it up. Then, you should go back to your (clean) apartment, which should be stocked with red wine, grapes, chocolate and some light jazz on the radio. Light the candles and turn on the radio to foster a romantic atmosphere and offer her something to eat or drink.
If this sounds trivial to you, you should only do what makes you both in the mood. If you just want to dim the lights instead of lighting everything up with candles, that's fine anyway
Step 3. Kiss her
If you want your girlfriend to have sex with you, then you have to be a true master in the art of kissing. Even if you've been kissing for a while, he should also know how to kiss her in a variety of ways and make sure your kisses are fresh. Don't overwhelm her or grab her when you close your lips. Instead, take it slow, nibbling it with your lips as you touch her hair or stroke her face.
- Take breaks between kisses so that she has time to breathe and want you even more.
- You won't be about to have sex with your girlfriend if all you've done is kissing each other. It takes a little longer for things to reach a natural progression.
Step 4. Make yourself wanted
If you really want your girlfriend to want you, you shouldn't act like a sexual fury, quickly switching from kissing her to touching her, tearing your clothes off and throwing yourself in the bedroom. Instead you will have to kiss your girlfriend for a few seconds, then go back, stroke her and talk to her. Repeat this move a couple of times and wait for him to go mad with desire.
- Why do you have to go to such lengths to make it work? Because then your girlfriend will feel that she likes you, but you will be able to control your desires and you will not be so desperate that you have to get your hands on her - even if you really are.
- This move will make her want to be the one asking for more.
Step 5. Touch it
If you want to turn your girlfriend on, you can start thinking about doing more than just kissing. First, lightly stroke her arms, the back of her head and her hair and then, moving forward, stroke her breasts under her blouse or wait for her to touch you. If the clothes are off, at least partially, you can kiss her breasts or touch her through her underwear, take off her bra with your teeth and touch her whole body to get her aroused.
- Try to make sure that your actions are reciprocated - if you are touching her and she doesn't react, then you are probably making her uncomfortable. Make sure it's ready for more before proceeding.
- If you are already in your room and find yourself in bed, then you can simply ask her if she is ready to have sex with you. You don't have to express yourself in an elaborate but not trivial way - just say, "Are you sure you're ready?" and be prepared for any response.
Step 6. Always avoid pressure on her
If your girlfriend says she's not ready to have sex with you, then you shouldn't pressure her. Don't open a discussion about it, saying things like "But we've been together for so long …", "Everyone else does …" or "But I really like you …". In fact, trying to reason with her will only frustrate her, annoy her, and make her much less likely to sleep with you.
Step 7. Respect their wishes
If he changes his mind and no longer wants to "proceed", or asks you to stop during the act, do so immediately. It may be helpful to talk in advance about what she wants and what she doesn't feel ready to do. Pay attention and never force her to do anything if she doesn't feel comfortable.
Step 8. Be a good judge
Learn to translate her reactions and don't insist when she is against it. There is always a tomorrow to give it another try. It's best to try to 'get her high' when she's in a good mood. Feelings cannot be simulated as they are a function of the mind. By acting at the right time and avoiding complicating things, you will ultimately make her more available no matter how long it takes.
