Not ready to lose a person, but do you think that by reconciling you will give the impression that you are desperate and dependent?
Steps
Step 1. Objectively evaluate how bad the breakup was
Did the person seriously offend you? Calm down and try to figure out if the other person might have had their reasons, or if it was a minor argument. The degree of flexibility in reconciliation should derive from this analysis.
Step 2. Give the other person space for a while and, if possible, try not to make the first move, because that way you will lose the advantage position, and in some extreme cases you will be rejected again
Step 3. Before doing something drastic like giving in and contacting the other person and praying for a reconciliation, think about how you would feel if the sides were reversed
You certainly don't want to make her think that she can treat you badly and then expect forgiveness without doing anything!
Step 4. Think of it like this:
if the other person doesn't make the first move, sooner or later things will go back to how they were before the episode. Letting the other person make the first move means giving them a chance to realize they were wrong and show you how important you are to them.
Step 5. Be difficult, and even if you think it's impossible for you to pretend, work hard, because the less available you are, the more the other person will want you
Step 6. Give the other person time to get over the fight
If you don't give her time to evaluate her mistakes, she'll keep repeating them. Let her think about what she did wrong, and let her work to correct the situation.
Step 7. Behave gracefully
When the other person contacts you to apologize, act gracefully and quickly end the conversation. Let her know she can't treat you like that and don't expect the consequences.
Step 8. Be detached for some time in her presence after the apology, and let her call you and strengthen the friendship
Don't overdo it though, because your goal is to reconcile yourself.
Step 9. When both of you have calmed down, sit down and talk about your problems, and make sure you don't offend the other person or you could spark another fight
Try to make your reasons understood so that a similar episode does not happen again in the future.
Step 10. Make sure the other person understands that if he or she ruins things again between you, you will not be so supportive of a reconciliation
Step 11. If you ruined the relationship, sincere apologies are a great way to start reconciliation
Remember: apologizing does not mean diminishing your value as a person.
Advice
- No matter how difficult the situation may be, it will only get worse if you lose your dignity, so never pray to the other person.
- Ephesians 4: 2-3: "Always be humble and kind, patient towards one another and bear each other's mistakes with love. Always do everything possible to remain united with the bond of peace in the Holy Spirit."
- If you think the person is making the same mistake again, consider whether it is worth moving on.
- Be patient, and don't expect things to go back to the way they used to be.
