In medium and long-term marriages, sometimes it is necessary to rekindle the flame of love. In the early stages of a relationship, the couple is very busy with passion and courtship techniques, but when marriage occurs, the gradual shift of attention to other responsibilities is inevitable: work, housekeeping and raising children.. Love manifests itself in a multiplicity of forms: to win back your wife you absolutely must find out how she wants to be loved.
Steps
Method 1 of 3: Awaken the Romance
Step 1. Fill your wife with compliments
Make her happy by complimenting and flattering her. Think back to what you told her on your first dates. Talk to her the same way and let her know that what you once loved still drives you to love her more and more today.
- Start the day with a compliment. As soon as she wakes up, you have to tell her that she is beautiful and how lucky you are to be with her.
- Do not give up. If he doesn't accept the compliment or downplay it because he doesn't believe in your sincerity, repeat it again. Reiterate the concept expressed and look her in the eye, then hug her to convince her that you really think what you said.
- Stopping winking at other women is an indirect way of complimenting your wife. There is nothing wrong with casting an innocent look, but if you stare at another woman or express appreciation for her you could hurt your wife's feelings. Just look at your wife and you will make her happy.
- Brag about your wife to others. If she's listening to you, she'll be impressed. If not, he will still hear from someone else and appreciate it.
Step 2. Indulge her
This doesn't mean you have to pass out to buy her expensive jewelry, dresses, or bags; rather, give her a special moment, like surprise her with a back massage, prepare her a hot bath with rose petals, or buy her a bouquet of flowers to deliver to her office.
- Buy her a soft bathrobe to wrap herself in after a hot bath or shower.
- Make sure she can spend time alone relaxing and doing what she wants around the house.
- Cook her favorite dishes. All he has to do is sit down at the table: you will take care of everything else.
- Give her a pair of fluffy slippers to wear around the house.
- Organize, without his help, a picnic to be consumed in front of a breathtaking view.
- Scented toiletries are always very popular. Give her such products as a gift, then fill the tub with hot water and rose petals. Hand her the soft bathrobe and slippers when she gets out of the tub.
- If you give her chocolates, of course, you are sure to go.
Step 3. Write her a love letter
Women like to receive original love letters from their admirers, especially in a society like today's where letters are a real rarity. Texting “I think of you” by text message, on Twitter or by email is a nice gesture, but delivering the message in an envelope with the name listed above is even better. Your wife would appreciate it for sure.
- Write down your most romantic thoughts and memories on an elegant letter paper. Apply a drop of your favorite perfume to the paper. Indulge in romance and write her one letter a week.
- Don't copy sentences from the Internet. Make your letter original and sincere, express your appreciation for them, and accurately describe what you are feeling as you express your thoughts. This way, you will be able to come up with a very personal letter.
- Experience your poetic vein. Even if you have never written a poem in your life, your wife will surely appreciate the commitment.
Step 4. Plan a romantic date
Avoid the classic dinner followed by the cinema because you might get bored. Rather, experience an unusual, stimulating or adventurous evening that will leave you with an indelible and romantic memory for the rest of your days.
- Try to live an experience full of the unexpected and adventure, like arriving at the airport without suitcases or without a ticket and then boarding the first plane bound for a new destination.
- Organize something stimulating, such as a new activity to do together: a pottery course, an ice skating or a lesson to learn the techniques of sensual massage.
- Be innovative and organize a balloon ride, a horse ride or a climb.
Step 5. Go back down the boulevard of memories
The bright side of a lasting marriage is the ability to collect a great deal of good memories. Do not lock your memories in a photo album or in the cage of nostalgia: bring them back to life. Act with your wife like she is your girlfriend again.
- Step back into the past until the moment of your first meeting. Kiss her and give her a compliment like when you wanted to win her over. Have dinner in the restaurant on the first date or go to the same cinema where you saw the first movie together.
- Sit back and watch your wedding video once more. Emphasize how lovely your wife was on that special day and how lovely she still is today.
Step 6. Focus on the quality of your sex life
Many people focus only on the number of times they have sex in a week, or they are too busy with work, children and other responsibilities to devote themselves to their partner, so sex comes down to a simple physical act., while instead it should represent an intimate meeting between two people. Once a week, try to slow down the pace of daily life and spend time alone in the room with your wife to regain intimacy. Show her how important it is for you to make love with her even today.
- There is no "right amount of sex" in a married couple. Focus on quality rather than quantity if you want to win back your wife's love. Don't forget all those special gestures that can show her that you are "making love" with her and not "sex".
- As pleasant as it is during a romantic encounter to have candles lit after a hot bath and soft background music, quality does not necessarily mean romance. The quality of sex depends on the intimacy you can achieve and on your ability to show your wife how much you love her.
Step 7. Take care of personal hygiene
Do not neglect hygiene and keep yourself in good health. Your wife will be proud to be by your side if you look after your outfit and show off a nice smile. He will also likely appreciate being in good physical shape. Shower every day, wear clean clothes, and brush your teeth and hair.
- This also involves cleaning up after doing these activities. Throw dirty clothes in the laundry basket and clean the sink after shaving.
- Don't neglect good manners. A long coexistence leads couples to reach a certain level of familiarity and confidence, but we must not take advantage of it. Show that you are polite by apologizing if you miss a belch or fart.
Method 2 of 3: Collaborate in Household Chores
Step 1. Help with housework
If your wife is primarily responsible for housekeeping in your relationship, make a commitment to help. The time you save her by offering your help, she can devote to one of her interests. What's more, he will appreciate your concern and active participation in cleaning the house.
- Household chores also include looking after young children. Assisting them with brushing their teeth, accompanying them to the bathroom, combing them, dressing them and making breakfast for them are time-consuming activities. If you can cooperate and take responsibility for your wife for a couple of days a week, she will be happy with the free time you have gained and the attention you give to the children.
- If feeding the dog, brushing it and taking it for a walk are not usually your responsibility, take care of it once in a while. You will make both your wife and the little dog happy.
- A few nights a week, wash the dishes and cutlery. Do the same with the laundry: do the washing machines and iron so she doesn't have to.
Step 2. Recognize the value of his work
Tell your wife that you appreciate all the work she does around the house. It is not very fun to do housework, drive the children from one place to another and go shopping, especially when there is also a career to pursue. If you don't participate in any of these activities, at least express your appreciation of his ability to engage in multiple fronts simultaneously.
- Recognizing your wife's hard work is important because there are no rewards, salary increases, or promotions for what she does at home. His commitment to running the shack must be acknowledged.
- He emphasizes the importance of his work in making your home a home and not simply a place to sleep. In this way, you will show her your esteem for all the affection, love and personal skills she invests for this purpose.
Step 3. Notice the little things
At the base of large companies there are small gestures. Try to notice if your wife has a new haircut, if she is wearing newly purchased jewelry, or if she uses unusual ingredients in her everyday kitchen. He will be happy to see that you are attentive enough to notice the news.
- Taking her hand when you go out for a walk or putting your arm around her neck when you watch television are other little things. These little "messages of love" will allow your wife to feel that you care about her and are happy to be around her.
- Don't forget to thank her. Remember: Just being married doesn't mean you can lose sight of his humanity. By thanking her you will show that you recognize the value of her hard work.
Method 3 of 3: Get Well Together
Step 1. Listen to it
Communication is the foundation of a long and prosperous marriage. You need to know how to listen to understand the ideas, decisions and interests of another person. Listen actively to your wife when she talks about her interests and really give her your attention - she will appreciate it. On the other hand, listening to her will show that you take her statements seriously and that her presence in your life is not taken for granted.
- As you talk about this and that, look her in the eye, give her all your attention, and recognize the value of the things she is saying.
- By listening, you will show that you want to fully understand it. Do you remember your first dates and how you were interested in everything he said? Try to rekindle that flame and commit to getting it excited again. Show empathy for her statements.
- Show that you are truly focused on her with gestures and words: approach her slightly when she speaks, maintain eye contact, nod, hold her hand, intervene by saying "Yes" or "I agree" and ask her something when she is finished. speak.
Step 2. Prove that you are a loyal person
Loyalty and trust are the foundation of any happy and lasting marriage. Betray one of these principles and it will be impossible to win it back. Be loyal to your wife physically and emotionally - it's important that she trust you on both counts.
- Being loyal means assuring your wife that you will be by her side, both physically and emotionally, whenever she needs it. In difficult times, he will know he can count on your support, your words of comfort and your availability.
- Being loyal means keeping promises. Do not do anything that will discredit your word or disappoint your wife's expectations.
- Respect her weaknesses and fill her shortcomings, just like she does with you. Being loyal means not humiliating your wife or getting angry about her mistakes.
- Present it to others in a positive way. You can reveal your frustrations to a trusted friend, but you must never humiliate your wife. A faithful spouse does not discredit his wife behind his back.
Step 3. Set common goals
Making long-term plans is key in planning a lasting relationship. As long as you constantly strive to achieve your common goals, you can be confident that you can be together for a long time. Do you want to move to a larger home or expand your current home? Do you want to go on vacation to some exotic country? Sometimes, dreams fade away when one is engaged in other chores. Decide with your wife which goals to pursue both in the short and long term.
- Think about and write down your goals separately. When you are done, get together and compare your notes. Are there any goals that look alike or match? Those are your "common goals".
- Redefining goals with your wife will help you understand where you need to go for years to come. By doing this, you will demonstrate how important the success of your marriage is to you and that you are planning a long life together.
- By making serious plans for your future, you will instill a sense of maturity and security in the relationship, while your wife's affection for you will grow.
- Celebrate success. Every time you reach a goal, celebrate: you have achieved it together as a couple and for this reason you must recognize its importance and celebrate it.
Step 4. Make your relationship safe
By security we mean many things: physical, economic and emotional security. This does not mean that you have to join the gym, become muscular and prepare to fight to protect your wife; rather, it means reaffirming your love for her by offering her support and being by her side when she needs you.
- Dedicate your time and attention to your wife and children. In this way, your wife will feel that she has a stable relationship and a close family.
- Give your wife confidence by communicating assertively. Communicating assertively means being honest, knowing how to express your feelings, knowing the opinion of others and asking for help avoiding threatening tones. This way, you and your wife will feel fulfilled and satisfied with your relationship.
Step 5. Show that you are a strong person
Show your wife that you are able to be close to her for better or for worse. Being a pillar will allow you to ensure a bright future for your relationship. Protect your wife and do not allow others to speak ill of her. Rather, defend and protect it.
- Show understanding when going through bad times at work or at home. Hug her warmly, tell her you love her and comfort her by promising that everything will be okay. If you commit to all this, he will fall in love with you again.
- Show that you are kind to everyone. Women want to have a generous, patient, and understanding husband. If you do this, your wife will be very happy.
Step 6. Allow it to have its own spaces
Everyone needs their space, even your wife. A woman has, in most cases, dual responsibility for the home and a full-time job. Give your wife the chance to spend time alone taking the kids out for a full day and letting her do whatever she wants, even if it's just hanging around and watching television.
- Encourage your wife to go out with her friends to relax and have fun away from everyday worries.
- Encourage her to pursue her interests so she can focus on something other than family.
Step 7. See a psychologist to regain love and happiness
It doesn't matter if you have serious problems to resolve or just need an outside person to discuss your marriage routine with - in both cases, couples therapy is a great tool for identifying conflicts that threaten your relationship and finding a solution. Accepting to take such a path is the right way to show your wife that you are taking even the smallest of problems seriously.
- Therapy is a smart move to strengthen your bond and to learn to understand the other person at every opportunity, not just when the relationship is in crisis.
- Therapy can teach you to use the skills you need to strengthen your marriage, such as speaking openly, solving problems, and dealing with differences of opinion.
- Attending therapy sessions will help you analyze both the positive and negative sides of your relationship and identify the causes of the conflict.
