For many, text messaging has become the primary (if not the only) means of communicating with friends, loved ones, and co-workers. For this reason, people have developed different methods of communicating with messages. If you are tired of having meaningless conversations with your acquaintances, feel the need to get rid of those who write too much or want to escape the jungle of abbreviations and emoticons, it is important to learn how to use this important form of communication in the most effective way.
Steps
Part 1 of 2: Follow the Communication Guidelines through Messages
Step 1. Write to someone who is worth your time
To break the never-ending cycle of meaningless text messages, you need to start talking to people who have interesting opinions. Don't write to someone just because you know they are at home and have nothing better to do than reply to you. If that means you won't hear from who you usually contact and will have to wait longer to get a response from someone who deserves your time, that's not a problem. If you have nothing to say, don't write; you would just waste your time. Better not to talk than to have a meaningless conversation.
Text messaging shouldn't be any different from in-person conversations - if you have nothing to say, don't keep writing
Step 2. Meet your standards
If someone is texting to you just to talk to someone, let them know that it doesn't suit you. Spend more time answering, make short sentences, be ambiguous and passive. Eventually the people who are bothering you will begin to realize that you are not making an effort to carry on the conversation and will stop texting you.
Step 3. Ask open-ended questions
If you are talking to someone you like to argue with, do what you can to make the conversation interesting. Ask questions that require more elaborate answers than yes or no, leaving room for the opinions of your interlocutor and creating opportunities for discussion.
Instead of asking "Do you like pop music?", Ask, "What is your favorite genre of music?". Questions of this type serve to spark interesting conversations and also demonstrate a sincere interest in the person, who will be tempted to explain themselves better
Step 4. Don't dominate the conversation
Don't ask questions or introduce arguments just to express your opinion about it. You will give the impression that you are self-centered, and if you don't know how to show the same enthusiasm when you listen to what the other person has to say, you will seem rude and annoying. So don't just describe your opinion, but also discuss and talk about your interlocutor's. If you are shy or have been raised with very strict standards of education, you may have the opposite problem, which is to try to keep others talking without offering much of your own. Try to speak for 33 - 50% of the conversation and always end your messages with questions or phrases that invite an open response.
Part 2 of 2: Communicate Clearly and Politely
Step 1. Avoid the replies of a sentence or a word
If you are not a person of few words and are unable to express everything you want to say in a single sentence, make an effort to always reply to messages with at least two sentences. The worst answer of all is "OK" or "K", which has such a negative connotation that it is considered an angry answer, although it is often used to answer the simplest questions. Once you have learned about a person's way of communicating, you will be able to understand whether answering with a monosyllable could make them bored or angry.
If you are angry with someone, don't write to them until you have had time to cool off and think about the situation. Answers in a word or phrase will only add to your anger
Step 2. Develop your communication style
Just as writers have different styles, you too should set a standard for text messaging. You should try to use the Italian language correctly, because the abbreviations used in messages are now considered obsolete and almost childish. Many people now have tariff plans that allow you to send unlimited SMS, so you have no excuse to write sentences with tangles of consonants, numbers and symbols that replace normal words. For this reason, it is not always necessary to insert smiley faces or hearts after each sentence, if typing them does not make you really happy. Nobody could take you seriously if you put:):]: D: P: /:(or>:(after each of your sentences.
Step 3. Call someone to have a deeper conversation
If an argument has taken an unexpected turn and has become more intimate or bright, call your interlocutor and speak to him directly. Often people communicate their ideas better verbally, when they don't have to pay too much attention to the choice of every single word.
Meet your interlocutor in person to have a real connection with him. Don't let the messages interfere with your way of expressing your thoughts and defend your opinions in all possible ways. You can't convey all the emotions in one message, and it's hard to overcome the effectiveness of face-to-face communication
Step 4. Conclude on a positive note
Don't suddenly end a conversation that's going well. Doing so is the equivalent of putting the phone in the face of a person who is finishing a sentence. If the discussion is over, let the person know you need to go for now, or say goodnight if you need to go to sleep. Be polite and courteous, so that your interlocutor understands when to go and is not surprised by seemingly unwarranted interruptions.
Advice
- People forget what you say and what you do, but they never forget what you made them feel. Feelings matter.
- Try asking questions that suit your interlocutor. This will grab his attention and entice him to respond, sparking a conversation.
- Don't write everything in jargon. It may be difficult to understand you.
- If you are not good at texting due to age or lack of interest, ask an expert to help you.
- Make sure the person you're writing to is present and reading your messages. Continuing to write "Hello" to those who cannot answer is repetitive and annoying.
Warnings
- Don't write while driving!
- Avoid using text messages to divulge personal information at all costs, such as expressing your feelings for someone, asking someone out, breaking up with someone, texting someone with sexual content, or annoying someone. It's tacky and impersonal, and that content should be reserved for face-to-face conversations (although you should never bother someone).
