Has your reputation been damaged? Retrieving or restoring it isn't easy (that's why it's so important to protect it). Sometimes the loss of reputation is not due to a lack of you, but to lies and rumors; sometimes it is caused by the mistakes you made yourself. Restoring your good name isn't always easy… but it can be done, with patience, determination and perseverance.
Steps
Step 1. Recognize true friends
Don't defend yourself from lies, especially with your true friends; just say those things aren't true. Remember that your true friends won't believe the lies about you, while those who don't know you might, at first, believe such lies; but if you have the patience and the will to prove your good qualities, even those who don't know you well will doubt those lies.
Step 2. Don't defend yourself from gossip and don't contribute to rumors about others
If someone has been lying about you, unless it is a situation where you simply have to justify your actions, say nothing, or as little as possible. If you start explaining, other people will get involved and take someone's side, and eventually you will realize that things have only gotten worse. The best thing is to let the gossip die of its own accord - and, if it is based on lies, it will almost always be the case.
Step 3. Admit your mistakes and correct them
If you've actually done some nonsense and now regret it (because, as a result, your reputation has been shattered), think about some way to fix it. Are you able, first of all, to do the right thing, which is to admit what you did and apologize? It is a difficult but necessary thing. Be humble and sincere. Afterward, try to do some kindness to people, to help in some way, to be a caring friend or companion: to restore your reputation by making good deeds for the nonsense you have done. That way people will feel more good than bad about you.
Step 4. Seek help
If you've gotten yourself in serious trouble, tell someone who can help you. This can be the parents, a religious counselor (as long as he has no intention of making a serious moral issue out of it, making matters worse), a trusted teacher, or even a complete stranger to a helpline service. Most of the time, no matter how bad the problem is, there is a way to get out of it in time.
Step 5. Know that everyone makes mistakes
Remember that, within a few weeks or months at the latest, no one will remember your misdeeds because everyone will be too busy dealing with their own. No one is perfect: We all live and learn from our mistakes, and as we learn, we try to behave better. Don't blame yourself too much, but, at the same time, don't forget what happened and how difficult it was to reestablish the good opinion that all those people you care about have of you.
Advice
- Give yourself enough time to be forgiven. Too often we make a mistake and then we want it to be deleted immediately. Unfortunately, things don't work out that way; that is why it is smart to carefully protect your reputation by behaving like a person of good character.
- Remember that it is very difficult to prove a negative fact. When someone says you did something, it's hard for you to prove you didn't, unless someone knows for sure (because they were with you at the time you were supposed to have done that). Instead of trying to disprove this fact, just plead your innocence and nothing else. Be very careful, in the future, to show your good character, so that when someone hears that you failed to do something, the first thing they will think will be: "This is not like Mario. Something must have happened. or, if that's true, there must be a good reason."
- After you've somehow restored your reputation, protect it. Don't let others spread lies about you, but instead of just talking to anyone who told you a lie about you, go find whoever told that person. Hunt down the source of untruths until you find it. Confront that person - usually, the most effective thing is to just ask why. "What have I done to deserve your hatred? Why are you telling this about me?" Once you find out where it came from, you have a chance to put an end to the lie once and for all.
