Knowing your strengths and weaknesses can be very helpful in stabilizing your life and improving professional interactions. Self-knowledge is a powerful tool that too often people neglect, because it is difficult and uncomfortable, or because it makes you feel uncomfortable. What are considered strengths by some people, however, may not seem as useful to others, and this can make them difficult to identify. This is something you will need to figure out for yourself, but you can do exercises to identify strengths and weaknesses, whether for work or for personal motivation. You'll also find tips that will help you practice these tactics when you need them most, such as during job interviews.
Steps
Part 1 of 6: Understanding Your Qualities
Step 1. Appreciate your commitment
If you are willing to carefully research your strengths and areas where you could improve, you are already a strong person. It takes courage to take this path. Be proud of yourself and remember that you are a wonderful person.
Step 2. Write down what you do during the days
To identify strengths and weaknesses, think about the activities you do most often or enjoy the most. Spend a week writing down all the activities you do during the day, giving them a rating from one to five, based on liking and engagement.
Studies have found that keeping a journal is a great way to gain more self-awareness, but also to better understand your desires and strengths. You can simply write a list of the most significant moments of a day or give a detailed account of your deepest thoughts and desires. The more you get to know yourself, the easier it will be to identify your personal strengths
Step 3. Reflect on your values
In some cases, it can be difficult to identify strengths and weaknesses because you have never thought about what your core values are. These are the beliefs that shape your thoughts and how you judge yourself, others and the world around you. They are fundamental to your approach to life. Take the time to identify these values to decide which aspects of life are strengths or weaknesses from your perspective, regardless of the opinions of others.
- Think about the people you respect. What do you admire about them? What characteristics do they possess that you appreciate? Do you see them in your life?
- Imagine being able to change something in your community. What would you choose? Because? What can you deduce from what is really important to you?
- Remember a time in your life when you really felt satisfied or fulfilled. What time was it? What had happened? Who was with you? Why did you feel those feelings?
- Imagine your house is on fire (but no one is in danger) and you can only save 3 items. What would you save and why?
Step 4. Examine your answers for repeating elements
After reflecting on your values, go through the answers and look for commonalities. Maybe you admire Bill Gates and Richard Branson for their entrepreneurial spirit and creativity. This suggests that you value ambition, competitiveness and genius. Maybe you would like to solve the problem of poverty in your community, so that everyone has a roof and a hot meal. This suggests that you value community, welfare and the commitment to change your situation for the better. You can have many basic values.
You can find lists of values on the internet if you need to name the things you appreciate
Step 5. Determine if your life is aligned with your values
In some cases, we may feel that we are weak in a particular area when we do not respect our own principles, whatever the reason. Living a life in line with your values can lead to more pronounced feelings of satisfaction and success.
- You may, for example, place great value on ambition and competition, but feel stuck in a career-less job, in which you are never tested and never get the chance to prove your skills. You may feel that you are weak in that area because your life is not in line with what is important to you.
- Or you could be a new mom who would really like to go back to being a teacher, because you value culture and intellect a lot. You may feel that "being a good mother" is a weakness, because one of your values (the importance of teaching) conflicts with another (the importance of family). In this case, you can find the right balance between your principles to respect both. Wanting to go back to your job doesn't mean you don't want to enjoy your child.
Step 6. Consider the environment you live in
Think about what are considered strengths or weaknesses according to the social conventions and customs of the local context. Social conventions are a set of rules that govern interpersonal interactions and are used in a certain geological or cultural area to help maintain good social relationships. Knowing the different conventions will help you understand which characteristics are considered strengths or weaknesses in a particular geographic area.
- For example, if you live in a rural area, where everyone does manual work, community members will likely value physical work and commitment characteristics more. If you live in a large city, however, these attributes may not be considered as important unless you have a job that requires manual labor.
- Consider whether the environment you live in allows you to enhance your strengths and personal characteristics. If not, think about how you could change that or move to an environment where your best features can be more valuable.
Part 2 of 6: Do a Reflection Exercise
Step 1. Find people to ask questions
You can do a Reflective Best Self or RBS to identify your strengths and weaknesses. This exercise will help you understand what other people think about you, and then find the strengths of your character. To start, think about the people in your life. Include past and present colleagues, old professors and teachers, friends and family.
Finding people in all possible fields will help you evaluate your personality on many levels and in many different situations
Step 2. Ask for an opinion
Once you have chosen the candidates, send an email asking what your strengths are. Ask them to describe particular situations in which they have seen you demonstrate those characteristics. Be sure to mention that strengths can be related to skills or your personality. Both types of responses are important.
An email is typically the best way to ask this question, because the person won't have the pressure of having to answer right away, they can think calmly about what to say, and they can be more sincere. Plus, you'll have a written document to review later
Step 3. Look for commonalities between the answers
Once you have received all the results, you will need to look for similarities. Read each answer and think about its meaning. Try to identify the traits highlighted by each person and read the situations cited to look for other characteristics. After interpreting all the results, compare them with each other and find the repeated strokes most often.
- It may be useful to create a table with a column in which to enter the names of the traits, one column for each answer and one for your interpretations.
- Let's assume, for example, that more people have told you that you are able to handle situations of great pressure well, that you are good at dealing with crises and that you can help people in difficulty. This means that you can stay calm under pressure and that you are probably a strong and natural leader. You may also realize that you are a compassionate and sociable person.
Step 4. Create a self portrait
Once you have all the results, write an analysis of your strengths. Make sure you integrate all the different aspects that emerged from the answers and those that you have extrapolated from your analyzes.
You don't have to make a complete psychological profile, but an in-depth portrait of your best self. It will help you remember the characteristics you demonstrate when you give your best to be able to use them more in the future
Part 3 of 6: Writing a List of Your Actions
Step 1. Write down your reactions
Consider your reactions to situations that require initiative, reflection, and insight. Before moving on to something more concrete, try to consider spontaneous reactions to experiences you have already experienced. Buy or get a journal to write your thoughts in.
You should do this because spontaneous reactions are able to make you understand a lot about your behavior, both in ordinary situations and in intense ones. You can write them down to better decipher your actions and skills
Step 2. Think of a difficult situation where something bad happened
Maybe you were the victim of a car accident or a child pulled up in front of your car and you had to brake suddenly. How did you react? Did you withdraw into yourself or did you face the challenge head on, using the tools and resources available to resolve the situation?
- If you've taken control and acted like a leader, courage and the ability to deal with difficult situations are probably your strengths. If, on the other hand, you have reacted by crying desperately, feeling helpless or taking it upon others, one of your weaknesses may be not being able to maintain control in tense situations.
- Make sure you look at things from different points of view. Feeling helpless after a car accident, for example, is a perfectly natural reaction to the stress of the experience. However, if you have asked someone for help, collaboration could be your strength. You don't always have to go it alone to be strong.
Step 3. Find a less challenging situation
Think of a time when you faced a difficult decision, but one that wasn't life or death. How do you react, for example, when you enter a crowded room? Do you want to talk to everyone or do you want to find a quiet corner away from the noise and talk to just one person?
A person who tries to communicate is adept at socializing and behaving extrovertly, while a person who tends to be quiet is more adept at creating individual bonds and listening. You can use both of these strengths to your advantage
Step 4. Consider the times when you have faced a difficult personal situation
Think about when you were put in trouble and had to react immediately. Were you quick to adapt to the new situation? Are you able to think fast, quickly finding a great response to a malicious comment from a colleague? Or do you have a tendency to absorb the blow, think and react only later?
- Remember that your strengths can have downsides. If you spend most of the time you spend alone writing and reading, for example, you may not be as adept as other people at reading conversations, but you are probably great at finding the plot of a book and discussing deep topics. You may also have grown up with younger siblings and this can mean that you are compassionate, patient, and good at tempering.
- It is important to remember that the world needs many different people, with varying strengths and interests. You don't have to be good at everything, just what you think is important.
- Those who can answer brilliantly or who solve problems quickly may have great wit, but they may be weaker when they have to focus on the small details. On the other hand, those who take more time to think may have good planning skills but little mental flexibility.
Part 4 of 6: Write a Wish List
Step 1. Ask yourself what your wishes are
Your dreams say a lot about you, even if you've spent a long time denying them. Try to understand why you would want to engage in those activities or achieve those goals and what it would take to do so. Probably, these are the passions and dreams of your life that often belong to the areas in which you shine the most. Many people fall into the trap of doing what the family recommends and then become a doctor or lawyer, when their personal aspiration was to become a climber or a dancer. In a new section of the diary, write your true wishes.
Ask yourself: "What do I want from life?". Whether you've just interviewed for your first job or you've just retired, you should always have goals and aspirations in life. Find what motivates you and makes you happy
Step 2. Decide what you like
Start asking yourself what are the things you appreciate the most. Write down the answers to the question "What activities do I find satisfying or enjoyable?". For some people, sitting in front of the fireplace next to their Labrador is extremely satisfying. Others, on the other hand, prefer a climb with their bare hands or a trip.
Write a list of the activities or things you do that make you happy and give you pleasure. In all likelihood, they belong to the areas in which you particularly distinguish yourself
Step 3. Consider what motivates you
In addition to desires, you will need to decide what motivates you. Write in your journal the answers to the question "When do I feel energized and motivated?". Consider the occasions when you have felt ready to conquer the world or inspired to rise to the next level. The areas that inspire and motivate you are where you are strongest.
Note that many people manifest their wishes as children, indicating that childlike self-awareness that many of us lose when family, peers, social expectations, or financial pressures suppress those dreams
Part 5 of 6: Assessing Strengths and Weaknesses
Step 1. Reconsider your weaknesses
"Weakness" is not the right definition of the characteristics you can improve. Many people are actually not weak, even if they may think so. Almost everyone, however, has the feeling that they can improve some skills and surpass themselves in certain areas. When you are not feeling very strong in a field, it is normal to believe that it is a weakness and to feel the need to work on it to become stronger and more competent. Instead of focusing on "weaknesses", which have a negative connotation, think about the things you can improve - this will help you stay focused on your future and personal development.
You should conceive of weaknesses as a part of yourself that you have the opportunity to improve, because it is close to your desires, or which, conversely, is in no way relevant to your aspirations and personal goals. Coming to one of these conclusions is acceptable. Weaknesses are not permanent aspects of our person, but rather modifiable characteristics that we can change to excel
Step 2. Identify areas where you can grow
They can be related to anything, including professional and social skills or an inability to linger at the table. You could also make a simple reference to the inability to kick a ball or quickly perform mathematical calculations. Often times, it is possible to improve simply by learning a life lesson and not repeating the same mistakes. In other cases, you need to work hard to overcome a shortcoming you think you have.
An apparent "weakness" could simply be an indication that a particular business isn't for you, so it's important to admit your limitations. If everyone was good at the same things, or if everyone had the same tastes, the world would be really boring
Step 3. Focus on your strengths
Some people find focusing on their weaknesses is a waste of time, or even a wrong perspective on the issue. You should, therefore, focus primarily on strengths and try to develop them as much as possible. This approach can be more effective in identifying personal weaknesses. Since people often view traits that they don't want to improve or don't fit into an area of interest as weaknesses, it is more helpful to focus on desires and strengths and progress from there. Be generous when you recognize your qualities, because you probably have many, even in areas where you feel "weak". Then focus on the areas where you could be most efficient.
- For example, if you wanted to become more assertive, you should start working on certain traits related to assertiveness that you already demonstrate, such as confidence and clarity. You may have trouble saying no, but you are able to express your intentions clearly without hurting others' feelings.
- Think about the aspects of your personality that you consider strengths. Being kind, generous, open-minded or good at listening are extremely important strengths that you may overlook. Be aware of these traits and be proud of having them.
- Another way to think about your strengths is to consider them innate talents, abilities, and desires that fit your personality and visions for the future. In other words, they are the characteristics that allow you to succeed in something without having to commit yourself, because you have always been able to.
Step 4. Write down your strengths and weaknesses
After evaluating everything you have written about actions and desires, you will need to focus on what you believe are strengths and weaknesses. Using the list previously received from your acquaintances and what you have learned about yourself from the other exercises, write down the professional and personal areas in which you feel strong and those in which you are most lacking. Focus on an interpretation based on your current life and don't look to the past or future wishes.
Remember, no one is evaluating you or judging you based on your answers, so be honest with yourself. You may find it useful to create two columns, one for "Qualities" and the other for "Weaknesses". Enter everything that comes to mind
Step 5. Compare the lists
Do they meet your expectations or did you have any surprises? Did you think you were good at something, but from the analysis of your actions did you understand that this is not the case? These misjudgments arise when you try to convince yourself that you have a certain characteristic, but difficult situations show your true personality.
Are there any discrepancies between your desires and your strengths? These differences can occur when you try to lead your life according to the expectations of others or according to your own view of what should be done, while having completely different desires
Step 6. Consider all the surprises and discrepancies
Look at the lists you have compiled. Look for surprises or things that don't add up. Reflect on why some qualities and weaknesses you have identified are different from expectations. It is possible that you thought you liked some things or that something motivated you, but in reality it isn't? These lists will help you notice these inconsistencies.
Focus on the areas that have differences and try to identify the reasons that explain them. You wrote, for example, that your aspiration is to become a singer, but from the list of your strengths it appears that you are good at math or medicine? While a singing doctor might be original, the two professions are quite different. Find out what are the areas that can give you long-term motivation
Step 7. Ask friends and family for opinion
Ask a close friend or relative for constructive criticism of you. While self-analysis may give you some answers, an outside opinion will help you to value your observations or identify vain illusions. Knowing how to receive constructive criticism is also a fundamental characteristic for living in a community. It's important not to take a defensive stance or interpret criticism as a personal attack just because someone suggests an area where you could improve. Learning to integrate constructive criticism into everyday life is a strength.
- If you don't think a relative can be completely honest, choose someone who tells you the truth and doesn't sweeten the pill. Find an external, neutral person, preferably a peer or mentor, who gives you honest and constructive criticism.
- Ask for a review of your list. Ask the person to review and comment on your list of qualities and weaknesses. Helpful comments and questions may include: "What makes you feel like you won't be able to act quickly in an emergency?" An outside observer might remind you of a time when you were the hero of the day in an emergency and that you had forgotten.
Step 8. Seek the help of a professional
If you are still having problems, or are feeling more confident with an outside opinion, ask a professional to help you identify your strengths and weaknesses. There are companies that can help you build a psychological profile, which are often employed by recruiting agencies. For a fee, you can undergo tests and receive a psychologist's evaluation of your personal and professional profile.
- While these tests won't reveal the essence of your personality, they can be a very useful starting point for identifying strengths and weaknesses.
- From the ratings received, you should find out what your strengths and weaknesses are considered. An effective test should be comprehensive to highlight repeated aspects of the personality. Having undergone such a test, be sure to speak directly with the psychologist, to derive all possible information from it.
- You can take online tests to assess strengths and weaknesses. Look for tests on the most trusted sites, written by licensed psychologists or similarly qualified professionals. If you have to pay for the tests, do some research on the company offering them to make sure you are making a good investment.
Step 9. Reflect on what you have discovered
After evaluating your strengths and weaknesses, take time to reflect and try to understand how you feel. Decide if you want or need to work on any weaknesses and figure out what you should do about them.
- Take a class or find activities that allow you to improve your weaknesses. For example, if you find yourself completely blocked when you have to react spontaneously, put yourself in situations where you have to do it regularly. You could take a theater class, join a sports team, or sing karaoke in a bar.
- Consider seeing a counselor or finding other ways to talk about your fears and concerns. If taking a class or becoming a theater actor doesn't solve your problems, or if you have deep-rooted fears and anxieties that prevent you from progressing, consider talking to a psychologist.
Step 10. Reject perfectionism
Be careful not to become a slave to your weaknesses. This feeling can quickly lead you to perfectionism and stave off your success. It's best to start with something you do well, then find the details to fix and improve over time.
- Let's say, for example, that you want to improve your communication skills. After reflecting on yourself, you have decided to be good at listening. You lock yourself up, though, when it's your turn to speak and that's your weakness. You decide to talk more, perhaps by intervening with an extra sentence or two during breaks in conversation.
- A perfectionist might say that, not being skilled in speaking, he doesn't want to waste time working on that aspect, because he would make mistakes. Learn to recognize that mistakes are part of the growth process and that you will have to make them to develop your skills.
Step 11. Don't deny the important moments in life
We all excel at something. There will be occasions when, after trying an activity for the first time, you will find that you have a natural talent.
It can happen in sports, in art, in creative projects, in interactions with animals, or when you take the place of an absent colleague at work. Not everyone will be able to live the moments that you will live, but when they do happen to you, treasure them to improve in the future and express your true potential
Part 6 of 6: Leveraging What You Learned in Interviews
Step 1. Consider the relevance of your strengths and weaknesses
You can use everything you've learned about yourself in job interviews. Think about how relevant your qualities and weaknesses are to the job you are applying for. To prepare yourself, think about what tasks are required by the job and consider the occasions when you have found yourself facing similar activities. What personal attributes can be considered strengths or weaknesses in those activities?
For example, if you are applying for a job as a computer programmer, talk about how proficient you are in computer use and problem solving. On the other hand, it may not be as relevant to mention your ping pong prowess, unless you know your employer has the same passion as you
Step 2. Show sincerity and confidence
When asked what your best characteristics are in an interview, be honest in describing your strengths. When an examiner asks you that question, they're not just curious, they want to know how good you are at talking about yourself. Social skills and the ability to self-promote are fast becoming some of the most important characteristics in the world of work. To evaluate them, an examiner starts by asking the candidate to describe their strengths and weaknesses, then they will consider how comfortable they feel doing it.
Step 3. Practice your interview skills
To become more proficient, practice talking to other people. Ask a friend to play the role of examiner and try to describe yourself. Do this many times, with many different people, until you start to feel more comfortable describing your strengths and weaknesses. At first you may feel like you are reading a script, but after some time you will be able to be more and more natural.
- Before the interview, think about all the possible examples you can cite to demonstrate your personal qualities. Examiners don't just want to know what your strengths are, they'll ask you for concrete examples where you've used those qualities to overcome problems or obstacles. Reflect on those situations, perhaps writing down as many of them as possible, so that you are well prepared for the interview.
- For example, instead of saying "One of my best qualities is my attention to detail", he cites a concrete example: "In my previous job I was responsible for checking all the figures in our monthly budget. In many cases I have found mistakes that have saved us significant sums. This attention to detail will be very helpful to me in my new job in your company."
Step 4. Don't try to pass a strength for a weakness
Potential employers are not stupid and will quickly notice these trivial attempts to make a good impression. In some cases, there are hundreds of job applicants and the instinct of many is to turn what they believe is a strength into a weakness. What you consider a quality, however, may not be rated as such by employers, who often look for employees who value flexibility and teamwork. These types of responses often give the impression that you are not fully aware of your qualities. The most common responses include:
- "I'm a perfectionist and I can't stand things being done wrong." Rarely does an employer consider perfectionism to be a real selling point, because it suggests that you ask yourself and others to meet unreasonable standards, so you may have trouble with procrastination.
- "I'm stubborn and I don't let it go". This answer may suggest that you are not flexible and are not good at adapting.
- "I have a hard time maintaining a good balance between private life and career because I put a lot of effort into my work." This answer may suggest that you are unable to fend for yourself, will likely have a nervous breakdown in a short time, or will be a difficult colleague.
Step 5. Be honest about your weaknesses
When the examiner asks you a question about your weaknesses, answer honestly. There would be no reason to ask the question if the answer was a monologue about how wonderful you are. That's not what the examiner wants to hear. Instead, he wants an honest discussion about the things you can improve and understand that you really know yourself. Here are some examples of true flaws:
- Being too critical;
- Being suspicious of authority or your peers;
- Being too pretentious;
- Procrastination;
- Talk too much;
- Being too sensitive
- Show lack of assertiveness;
- Show lack of tact.
Step 6. Recognize the worst parts of your flaws
There are parts of the weaknesses you need to address and specify how they can affect your performance. It can make a great impression to talk about how a flaw has affected you in the past or how it could affect your professional performance. You will demonstrate sincerity and intuition, even if you have to be careful what you say.
Say, for example, "Today I am a procrastinator. I understand that this has an impact on the amount of work I can get done and on what my colleagues can complete. In college I was able to overcome the problem because I knew the system. I have found a way to get around it and still get results. I understand that this will not be possible in the world of work, because it is not the right way to work, to achieve my goals and accomplish my tasks."
Step 7. Show the examiner that you are committed to overcoming your shortcomings
Again, bringing practical examples is a better choice than an idealistic approach. Giving an idealistic answer might suggest that you are just trying to make a good impression and have no real insight into the problem.
For example, tell the examiner, "I'm taking concrete steps to correct my procrastinating habit. I set artificial deadlines and give myself incentives when I respect them. This has helped me a lot."
Step 8. Talk about your strengths confidently
You should seem confident, but not arrogant. Try to be confident but remain humble about past successes and your qualities. Try, of course, to honestly choose skills that are relevant to the business or organization you are applying for. The real strengths fall into three main categories:
- Knowledge-based skills, such as computer skills, languages and technical experience.
- Transferable skills, such as the ability to communicate, manage personnel and solve problems.
- Personal traits, such as friendliness, safety and punctuality.
Step 9. Offer examples when talking about a strength
It's good to say you're great at dealing with people, but it's even better to prove it. Describe the impact of your qualities in real life by citing examples from your personal or professional life. Eg:
- "I'm an excellent communicator. I pay attention to the words I say and avoid being ambiguous. I'm not afraid to ask my superiors for clarification when I don't understand their instructions. I try to imagine how different people can interpret the questions and statements."
- You can demonstrate your strengths and qualities by citing your past successes.
- If you've won any awards or accolades, now is the time to say it.
Advice
- Be careful not to get lost behind false desires created by mistaken beliefs. True desires are the ones that can bring total fulfillment into your life and not just daydreams. Knowing this difference could help you avoid serious mistakes when building a career and life in general.
- Changing weaknesses takes time, don't just try to turn a weakness into a strength. You cannot radically change your true nature, but you can make small improvements.
Warnings
- Don't think you don't have a chance if you have any weaknesses. We all have flaws to overcome. Imagine if you were the examiner and the candidate was just celebrating his perfection.
- In a job interview, never brag about your strengths and never complain about your weaknesses. Be direct and suggest ways to overcome your supposed weaknesses. When it comes to qualities, be sincere and humble, so as not to appear presumptuous.
