It's not easy for a woman to find a nice guy, and honestly it's not as easy for a man to find a good girl. This article is written from a man's point of view to help frustrated women who are really looking for a nice guy but keep finding failures.
Steps
Step 1. Be yourself
When you meet someone for the first time, you may be tempted to be someone you are not, such as "showing your best side". There is nothing wrong with wanting to make a good impression. However, it is possible to go too far and in return push men away. The same happens with the myths about sexy dressing and excessive flirting. If you don't respect yourself, you will only attract men who have no respect for you and your body, and a nice guy will find it harder to take you seriously. Be yourself and a real man will respect you.
Step 2. Get a life
Desperate, dramatic, and suffocating relationships often have their roots in the need and despair of having a man who fills life. Even if you have little faith in yourself, work harder on it to build it. Reach your goals, explore your passions, have an interesting life, do things that take you beyond your limits. Don't show that you are tough to overcome shyness; gradually learn to build trust with a group of people, so that your boyfriend is not the only person you open up to and share your life with. Also remember to trust yourself first and foremost. If you don't trust yourself, chances are you won't trust your man as much.
Step 3. Relax and be quiet
Most guys hate girls that are possessive, short-tempered, clingy, domineering, etc. Learn to relax and have fun. We all have a lot of things in life; don't be a melodramatic person who is hard to please. Having a woman around who makes life more difficult rather than pleasant will make him lose interest. If you do things like show genuine concern when a man is having a bad day, you will earn his respect and be able to win him over. He will reciprocate you for it. Remember that most men, especially good ones, are looking for someone to feel comfortable with, and not a woman who is always tense.
Step 4. Realize that there are differences in communication
Men often miss the subtle meaning that women convey with body language. Don't judge a guy for it; it's the way men are. Subtle bodily messages, like a smile, just make him think you might like it. He can't imagine that instead it means that you ARE interested in him without accusing him of being an arrogant egotist. To be more explicit, gradually introduce more obvious body language such as touching his arm in a playful way, teasing and teasing him in a playful way, winks, jokes between you, gaiety, or (when you know him better) try to find a point where it is ticklish. (Don't be afraid to tease him jokingly about smaller things. Women who pretend a man is perfect are seen as weak in their eyes.) Flirting will not only show him that you like him enough to approach him in a physical and playful way, but also break those physical barriers that allow a man to feel more comfortable to the point of making advances to you. Don't forget to see how he reacts to these things with you though.
Step 5. Take a good look inside
Psychological studies have shown that people seek partners who fill a psychological void. Sometimes these gaps are unhealthy. For example, an "unhealthy" woman will actually look for any man out of the desire for seduction, or to attract attention and feel desired. Look inside yourself and ask yourself why you want that man so much, be really honest with yourself, and if necessary, talk to a therapist about this. A troubled woman only attracts an equally troubled man, and a good, sincere man wants nothing to do with a woman who has more problems than he does. If you want a good and healthy relationship with a real man, make sure your mental state and intentions are healthy.
Step 6. Stop playing
Nobody likes a partner who plays mind games. This is deceptive and would hurt anyone who has faith in you. Be genuine, don't play games, and a nice guy will respect you and may even chase you. Playing mind games will only make Nice Guys run away. Remember the talk about communication? It is especially true in this case. If you like a guy, don't push him away by acting like you don't like him. Tell him. Of course, there are some men who like the thrill of being chased, but all good guys just want to respect you and your wishes, and they will leave you alone if you insist on doing so. Remember that men communicate directly; if you act like you don't want it, he'll think you don't really want it.
Step 7. Treat him with respect
This is the most important thing of all. Men hate being with a woman who inhibits them, and a nice guy won't take long to leave such a woman. Don't be afraid to help your man feel good about himself. A little known secret is that men are at least as insecure as women. If you are with his friends or family, take the opportunity to make your man seem "the man" of the couple. This will allow you to win her love and respect.
Step 8. Don't be afraid to make the first move
Let's be honest: no man desperately needs any woman; would rather meet a good girl. If he's a nice guy, then he'll at least appreciate a compliment to his charm. But remember that compliments are usually given to acquaintances. People who are intimate usually have a more honest relationship, with a playful way of teasing and teasing. Think about the beautiful relationship between brothers and sisters, parents and children, especially couples: they always joke, laugh, tease and flirt in a positive way. A woman who compliments all the time can be just plain boring and seem desperate. Even if you are an old-fashioned girl and you don't want to be the woman who asks a man out, you can also just approach him to talk to him, and be able to be with him. Do not overdo it anyway, unless he is already attracted to you before the meeting, because the more obvious you have been planning this meeting for a long time without his direct encouragement, the more desperate and less attractive you will seem. Work on how to build the attraction first.
Step 9. Respect yourself
If you say no, he should stop. If it doesn't, forget it. Never be uncomfortable saying no. Don't go against your morals to try to keep a boyfriend. If you think this is necessary, then either he is not the right man, or he is good, but he just doesn't fit in well with you (for example he is dating more people at the moment and is honest and straight about it while you stay. looking for an exclusive relationship). Don't even be uncomfortable saying yes. If you think the time is right, believe in your worth, don't be worried that you are "selling out." Respect yourself and be sure he will come back! A man who doesn't respect you from the beginning has never respected you enough to begin with; and a man who disrespects your desire to wait is too impatient to be a good companion. Either way, find someone else.
Step 10. Follow the golden rule
This means apply the same rule that you would apply to others as well as to yourself, including him. Real men notice this, they just don't shout it around. For example, if he tells you he has a girlfriend and things don't work out, stop! And she thinks that for a woman this can be a test of how to handle the situation. So don't take another step, but cut the communication as the "golden rule" suggests. Example number two: If you want to find the ticklish spots, then don't complain if he then tries to find yours in response. Don't go on with the talk about how you don't need men or "the men here, the men there" if you don't want him to treat you the same way. At the same time, however, he treats him, and the others, with respect, dignity and honor. Others will notice too and maybe, if they know you're looking for a good guy, a real man, but you haven't found him yet, they might introduce you to one!
Step 11. Don't be clingy
This means you don't have to show that you love someone by being close to them all the time. He too needs his space and he needs to know that you don't feel the need to follow him wherever he goes. Above all, he needs to know that you have your life.
Step 12. Do some research that may help you
If you want to know more about how to conquer a boy, there is an excellent online book (in English) that can help you: www.howtogetaman.org
Advice
- Practice the golden rule. If you want him to do something, you should be equally willing to do it yourself. Do you want him to ask you out or do anything else for you? You have to be willing to do the same, and not wait for him to do it first. Nice Guys respect the woman who first practices the rules she asks a man to abide by.
- A good way to meet someone is through other people, or activities you enjoy. Don't start practicing a hobby or habit just to meet someone. If you meet him at the bar, he will be inclined to be a drinker. If you meet him in a parish it is likely that he is religious. First impressions are important so if her first impression of you is that you are an "easy girl", it will be difficult for her to change. The same applies if his first impression of you is that you are a "stiff girl" or "mind games".
- Men are able to identify if the interaction in the office is in turmoil or distant. How then to become fantastic, wonderful and sweet, and flirt using your charisma to create the right environment, so that men can visit you at least once a day? And have the suitors in the office hanging around you from time to time? Take care of your body with good nutrition, hygiene and exercise. Why not? Use a beautician or style expert to fine-tune your look. Middle-aged and older people (women) usually do better with a normal face without an excessive double chin; men are more attracted to the profile than to an ideal face, so don't let yourself go.
Warnings
- Remember that interesting men are looking for interesting women. Make sure your life isn't just him.
- Always give a man the space he needs. Never meddle between a man and his friends, family duties, or favorite hobbies like playing in a band, asking him to choose. In the long run he will hate you for it, even if he initially chose you.
