Understanding your feelings can be a real challenge, whether you are in a stable relationship or wanting someone from afar. While there is no clear and foolproof way to decipher your feelings, it is possible to make a certain distinction. These tips will help you understand the difference between love, infatuation, and desire.
Steps
Method 1 of 3: Part One: Recognizing True Love
Step 1. Find out if you treat the object of your interest as a person or a thing
You care for this person despite their flaws. You are committed to staying by his side under any circumstances. You can tell her anything about you, even an uncomfortable truth, because you know she will accept you anyway.
Step 2. Assess how confident you feel
You know that your partner will always be by your side regardless of everything and you are ready to commit for a lifetime.
Step 3. Think about how long this relationship has been going on
You have known this person for a very long time and you cannot imagine your life without them.
Step 4. Analyze the way you think about this person
A funny thing happened to you at work and you can't wait to tell him about it. Or you've had a bad experience and need to talk to someone who understands you. If your partner is the first person you think of in these circumstances, when you want to share an intimate thought, then chances are you are in love.
Step 5. Evaluate how you handle conflicts
When you argue, you keep arguing until you find common ground. No fight can ruin your relationship, and you appreciate that he always tells you the truth, even if it can be painful.
Step 6. Think about whether you would like to take the relationship to the next level
You are comfortable with your partner and have a strong bond based on trust.
Method 2 of 3: Part Two: Finding Out If It's Infatuation
Step 1. Find out if you treat the object of your interest as a person or a thing
When you are infatuated, the mind is obsessed with the other person's thinking. You don't just think about her, about the fact that you would like to reveal everything about yourself to her. You have idealized it and your vision does not necessarily correspond to reality.
Step 2. Assess how confident you feel
You don't feel very confident, rather you think you would like to impress this person. Your goal is to please her and you are anxious because you don't know her true feelings.
Step 3. Think about how long this relationship has been going on
Your relationship hasn't started long, and even if you constantly think about the other person, you're not sure if they have what it takes for a long-term relationship.
Step 4. Analyze the way you think about this person
You constantly think about his smiles, the way he looks at you or says your name. You obsessively think about these details and try to understand what his feelings are towards you based on these somewhat trivial elements.
Step 5. Evaluate how you handle conflicts
When you disagree, you fear the relationship is over. In addition, you are not sure that you know this person well and you doubt that your impressions of them may be completely wrong.
Step 6. Think about whether you would like to take the relationship to the next level
You would like to ask this person out as a real couple, but you are concerned about the possible answer. You fear that asking her for a commitment could scare her and end up moving away from you. Your feelings aren't deep enough for love. You're probably just plain infatuated.
Method 3 of 3: Part Three: When You Feel Excited, Bored, and Full of Desire
Step 1. Find out if you treat the object of your interest as a person or a thing
If you try to win someone over to show them as a trophy, or you just want to take them to bed, you actually treat them as a thing and you probably feel nothing but physical attraction.
Step 2. Assess how confident you feel
Safety is not important, you are only interested in the understanding between you in bed. After you get what you want, staying with her or leaving her is completely indifferent to you.
Step 3. Analyze how you think about this person
Try to figure out how you might get invited to his house. Your goal is to break down this person's defenses so that they are willing to have sex with you.
Step 4. Evaluate how you handle conflicts
What does it matter if you fight? You can find someone else without the hassle of fighting and fighting. The sex is great, but it's not worth it, unless it's makeover sex after an overwhelming fight.
Advice
- Friendship should carry some weight in a long-term relationship. In 50 years, if your partner doesn't really like you, you will be miserable.
- Don't expect a person to change for you.
